Anonymous wrote:I know I'm beating a dead horse, but I still feel like people don't understand that the issue is that I JUST cleaned it. Yes, he's a slob with the shoes and the socks and everything else, including that we both work but I do all the cleaning. I'm not complaining about that because I do let stuff go because he's got other redeeming qualities.

There is something about watching me clean something and immediately dirtying it that feels different to me.

Be happy for what you have.

Are you people effing serious?
I get it that it's a pain to live with a slob, but THIS ONE thing.... Just grow up and learn to appreciate what you have. Chances are what you have is a pretty decent guy, actually.
I have a neat freak husband and i promise you, it's not a good feeling to be on the receiving end of his nagging over pointless little things. It really has caused me loving him a lot less.

I know I'm beating a dead horse, but I still feel like people don't understand that the issue is that I JUST cleaned it. Yes, he's a slob with the shoes and the socks and everything else, including that we both work but I do all the cleaning. I'm not complaining about that because I do let stuff go because he's got other redeeming qualities.

There is something about watching me clean something and immediately dirtying it that feels different to me.

Anonymous wrote:My husband does 98% of the dishes so I usually don't care where he leaves his dishes. I do the laundry. So when I find his socks on the floor touching the outside of the hamper, I want to scream.

I hope you get help with that. But if you want to continue to let that assault your senses enough to feel like screaming, well, that's your choice.

I'm tired of "assuming" my husband will just leave his dishes around for me to deal with. It's not about symbolism so much as its about respect.

(Not OP)

Anonymous wrote:It just drives me crazy and I've told him a million times.

If the sink is empty, put your dish in the dishwasher. You know, that thing that is RIGHT next to the sink. It's fine if we've all eaten and there is a sink full of dishes. Ok, go ahead and add one more, no problem. But if I emptied the sink after dinner, don't put your late night snack dishes into my clean sink! It is like walking with muddy shoes on the floor someone just mopped when you can easily go around. I HATE emptying the sink and coming down the next morning to find dishes in it.

I know, I know, it's a small thing. However, it means I start off the morning irritated with him. The house is in a constant state of chaos due to the four people who live in it. Please, can you just give me the morning with a clean sink, for the love of God.

NP here; have not read replies. Just want to say as a DW of a total slob, that I get it, OP. It's not that it's a trivial thing and you being picky. it's something you've asked for time and time again, and it's something small, and he just doesn't do it. So it becomes symbolic of him not caring that it's important to you. So it becomes symbolic that he doesn't care.

But it's not symbolic. As a general rule, men are not symbolic creatures. So don't take it that way. See it as a dish, only a dish. Assume it will be there, so you don't have to deal with the morning disappointment. This approach will free you. It's about making your life together ok in the long term; not winning this battle.

And FWIW, the morning will never be easy. So digest and accept that, and you will be calm in the morning.

And OP, again...I totally get it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Well what IS SO HARD About putting it on the dishwasher? Are they so f$%&ing lazy they can't take one more SECOND to open the dishwasher and put the dish in? WOW.

It's not hard. Just not necessary. DH or I will load the dishwasher when it's ready to be loaded. Until then it can sit on the counter.

It's ready to be loaded when it's empty and you have dirty dishes. Do you not empty it until you need the dishes?

It gets unloaded when we have time. Sometimes it's empty and sometimes it's still full. Either way we usually unload/load as a batch. Not one-off dishes here or there. More efficient that way.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have kids? Just wait until you have teenagers in the house. The dishes don't even make it to the sink. DS loves his midnight snack and each morning all I can say is gross when I see the dishes. I keep nagging him to get them in the sink and rinse them - forget about the dishwasher.

I'm sorry, but this just isn't true in all families. And frankly, having two parents that set the right example from the start can help avoid it.

Leaving dishes anywhere except the dishwasher or the sink is 100% unacceptable in our house and results in not being allowed to eat outside the kitchen/dining room. I cannot imagine allowing dishes being left in other parts of the house as a few posters have mentioned. It's about setting & enforcing expectations.

Hahaha. Please, tell me how I can ban my husband from eating in the living room. I'd love to know how I can enforce this.

My husband does 98% of the dishes so I usually don't care where he leaves his dishes. I do the laundry. So when I find his socks on the floor touching the outside of the hamper, I want to scream.

Anonymous wrote:A happy family is better than a clean house. Not advocating filth and grime and squalor, but rather advocating "pick your battles." I only wish this was the worst problem I had right now...

NP. My husband's slovenly household habits make me unhappy.

So there's that.

Has anyone seen "The Magic Coffee Table?" It's a comedic video about this cleaning/household/relationship issue.

[youtube]O1_QTm-wpsY[/youtube]



Here's the link, in case I (still) didn't embed it properly.

http://youtu.be/O1_QTm-wpsY