Is your child mainlining? Drug use has never made sense to me.

For the posters who think that teens are only experimenting with drugs and aren’t somehow “old” enough to be addicts, you are wrong. Teens can be addicts. Parental intervention is great, but it can’t stop addiction all the time. The best parents on earth can’t stop addiction. It just isn’t how the disease works.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, if it is heroin, you need to ditch the kid ASAP.

There is no saving a heroin addict. It will just end with pain and suffering for the entire family. Change the locks and don't let him in.

You are wrong. I have family members who have been as low as you would like, who are now clean, sober and well-employed.

Don't you dare tell me I don't know what its like. My 22 year old son is a heroin/multi-drug addict and has been since age 16. If I could have him alive again, I would do ANYTHING. Sadly, the truth is, as soon as he stuck a needle in his veins he was dead. The only thing you can do is kick him out, change the locks, and hold a funeral for the human being he is.

Look at the stats. The only successful method of getting 'clean' is to give them a script for suboxone or methadone, aka legal heroin, to pad the stats. That's not clean, that's just being a legal junkie.

You are a terrible parent.

Take great issue that the only way to get clean is through suboxone or methadone. There are many, many heroin users who have gotten clean through hard withdrawal and no substitute drugs at all.

I do kind of agree that suboxone and methadone are legal heroin and do have lots of objections to them being promoted as the answer. They are addictive and getting off them can be harder than heroin because they have much longer half lives. But many people see nothing wrong with people being on these drugs for life. It is very common for users to use methadone or suboxone as backstops for days when they can't score heroin. Plus, there is now a methadone clinic lobby that clamors for more public funding. That said, these drugs do have a role in treating addiction, just not nearly as prominent as they do now.

Way better to do naltrexone (Vivitrol), which blocks opiate receptors and is non-addictive.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, if it is heroin, you need to ditch the kid ASAP.

There is no saving a heroin addict. It will just end with pain and suffering for the entire family. Change the locks and don't let him in.

You are wrong. I have family members who have been as low as you would like, who are now clean, sober and well-employed.

Don't you dare tell me I don't know what its like. My 22 year old son is a heroin/multi-drug addict and has been since age 16. If I could have him alive again, I would do ANYTHING. Sadly, the truth is, as soon as he stuck a needle in his veins he was dead. The only thing you can do is kick him out, change the locks, and hold a funeral for the human being he is.

Look at the stats. The only successful method of getting 'clean' is to give them a script for suboxone or methadone, aka legal heroin, to pad the stats. That's not clean, that's just being a legal junkie.

You are a terrible parent.

Not a terrible parent at all. People who haven't dealt with serious opioid addiction have no idea.

Check your child's reading material, TV viewing and social media use. I was definitely at risk for OD as a teen, partly because mental health care and depression were romanticized by my the stuff I was reading.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, if it is heroin, you need to ditch the kid ASAP.

There is no saving a heroin addict. It will just end with pain and suffering for the entire family. Change the locks and don't let him in.

You are wrong. I have family members who have been as low as you would like, who are now clean, sober and well-employed.

Don't you dare tell me I don't know what its like. My 22 year old son is a heroin/multi-drug addict and has been since age 16. If I could have him alive again, I would do ANYTHING. Sadly, the truth is, as soon as he stuck a needle in his veins he was dead. The only thing you can do is kick him out, change the locks, and hold a funeral for the human being he is.

Look at the stats. The only successful method of getting 'clean' is to give them a script for suboxone or methadone, aka legal heroin, to pad the stats. That's not clean, that's just being a legal junkie.

You are a terrible parent.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also, I'm sure this won't be a popular opinion, but along with getting my kid help I'm not sure I would actively try to cover this up. You know, there's consequences to this shit. You wanna play with drugs, maybe you can accept that it's going to cause your peers to gossip about you and possibly ostracize you. That's what happens when you're a druggie, decent people avoid you. I wouldn't be in such a hurry to soften that blow for my kid as it might do a lot towards making them reconsider their drug usage.

Druggies are decent people too, PP. Addiction is a disease. People need help--not stupid judgement. Did you realize that drug overdoses are now the leading cause of accidental death in this country? We need mental health services, needle exchanges, access to OD prevention drugs, and lots of compassion:
http://www.npr.org/2016/02/18/464463631/when-a-loved-one-dies-of-overdose-what-happens-to-the-family

Yeah yeah yeah that's all well and good but many of these people could have been straightened out well before becoming addicts with good parental intervention and maybe some solid natural consequences from peers. A teen who is experimenting with drugs isn't at the addict stage yet. Goal is not to cure an addict here, it's to prevent further use of drugs period because it's still stoppable at this age. Social rejection is a big influence at that age is all I'm saying.

You're an idiot. The "rock bottom" theory of recovery doesn't work with kids or adults. And drug-using kids likely hang out with drug-using peers. They don't care what their straight classmates think.

So very sorry about your nephew. My little brother is 28 and still fighting addiction (numerous rehabs), it is truly a horrendous disease. On day he will either be clean or I will get a call I secretly dread. Hugs to you and your family.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hazelden's teen/young adult program was very helpful for my nephew.

http://www.hazeldenbettyford.org/treatment/locations/plymouth

Nephew poster here. Percocet (prescribed for legitimate pain) to heroin addiction in Ivy League school. OD'd and lived. Graduated with 4.0 GPA. Got clean with several attempts at rehab. Went to NA. Got a second degree in hard sciences to apply to medical school. Still clean after 7 years. Was in a car accident earlier this fall. ED gave him percocet and he stupidly took it. Back to heroin in a week. Died second week of November of heroin (heavily laced with fentanyl according to the medical examiner) OD. Top of his medical school class.

Believe me, this did not happen because his parents did not intervene and "stop" his addiction. His parents would have done anything for him and did do everything possible to help him.

Addiction is an illness. Parents can get kids help, but cannot prevent addiction especially as kids get older.

There is so much bad information in this post. Drug use is scary in any kid. Rely on real addiction experts to get help.

Addicts are people, many of whom appear quite normal outwardly. They are not necessarily the "druggies" you think of as dirty, homeless, and social outcasts. my nephew was never a social outcast.

Anyone who refers to medical treatment of heroin as legal junkies has absolutely no idea about what addiction really is.

Addiction is a disease.

Damn that is absolutely heartbreaking.

Anonymous wrote:Hazelden's teen/young adult program was very helpful for my nephew.

http://www.hazeldenbettyford.org/treatment/locations/plymouth

Nephew poster here. Percocet (prescribed for legitimate pain) to heroin addiction in Ivy League school. OD'd and lived. Graduated with 4.0 GPA. Got clean with several attempts at rehab. Went to NA. Got a second degree in hard sciences to apply to medical school. Still clean after 7 years. Was in a car accident earlier this fall. ED gave him percocet and he stupidly took it. Back to heroin in a week. Died second week of November of heroin (heavily laced with fentanyl according to the medical examiner) OD. Top of his medical school class.

Believe me, this did not happen because his parents did not intervene and "stop" his addiction. His parents would have done anything for him and did do everything possible to help him.

Addiction is an illness. Parents can get kids help, but cannot prevent addiction especially as kids get older.

There is so much bad information in this post. Drug use is scary in any kid. Rely on real addiction experts to get help.

Addicts are people, many of whom appear quite normal outwardly. They are not necessarily the "druggies" you think of as dirty, homeless, and social outcasts. my nephew was never a social outcast.

Anyone who refers to medical treatment of heroin as legal junkies has absolutely no idea about what addiction really is.

Addiction is a disease.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many of the private rehab facilities, like Ashley, have substantial financial aid (scholarships) and become quite affordable when combined with insurance (which typically pays next to nothing). Start calling and ask about aid. And don't just call locally. Also call out of state and start with the big ones, like Hazleton or Betty Ford. They will help point you in the right direction if they can't help directly.

And stay AWAY from Delray Beach Florida! While it is the rehab capital of the US, the places there are more often than not scams that are nothing more than cash cows for the owners.

Hazleton and Betty Ford are big leagues. Hugely expensive, and for SERIOUS long-term addicts. Not a teen who may have been experimenting or is new to drugs. You don't go that hard for something at this age.

Hazelden and Betty Ford are now the same organization. They have a teen and young adults program. If you have kids with drug problems, getting them into good rehab programs is important. They have programs for addicts, both long and short term.

If you think Hazelden is only for long term addicts (i'm not sure how you qualify for that), you don't know much about addiction and treatment.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry--have BTDT. Have been with my child seizing while heart rate dropped to ten beats a minute wondering if the EMTs would ever make it in time with their Narcan. This may not have been your absolute low point, but it was mine.

I have told no one about this or the addiction problem other than immediate care providers. Child has made excellent recovery and is in college getting nearly all As with heavy STEM course load. The planned career path would be challenging with a history of drug use.

I suppose I could have unloaded on everyone I know that but for Narcan I would have a dead child or some of the worst of the addiction period but it would have been profoundly unproductive.

I would have lost my child's trust--which ultimately, as child liberally acknowledges, allowed me to pull child out of addiction. Think about it--this is your child's health problem; it really isn't yours to share. Beyond that, what good would it have done? There are way too many people out there just dying to hear the worst about your child so they can feel better about theirs and you can bet none of them believe in redemption, of which my child is living (emphasis) proof.

PP I know this is an old post so you might not even be around. But if you are: can you please share what you did to help pull your D.C. Out of this?

Surprised to see this thread on which I commented multiple times come up again. I also did the post on the previous page about myths. Child used off and on for some time without getting physically addicted. One of these incidents involved the OD. I instituted a program of twice weekly drug tests at a set time (earlier random drug tests were an abject failure). Refusal to take the test it was made clear was the same as a positive. The consequence for a positive was outpatient rehab. I went to the rehab to line up things in advance so I could be ready to act immediately if needed.

I was out of town for eight days and child used multiple times. When I came back child knew I would do a drug test first thing. She turned herself in and said she needed help because she had become physically dependent. Took her to the rehab to register. Detox was in order but child couldn't face being on a locked ward, so our only option was at home detox. I used the Thomas Recipe, which gives advice on how to do this. There are medications that can help--we had Klonipin and used that with various supplements. It is not pleasant and I took time off work to monitor, but in retrospect I highly recommend. A lot of detox is quite pleasant because people are heavily medicated on benzos. Most places put people on suboxone, which is addictive. so a person has to go through a second detox. DIY detox is rough and more of a deterrent to further use.

Child went a couple of times to the outpatient rehab, but the stress of everything brought on seizures (epileptic) so the outpatient place kicked her out because of her health issue. I arranged individual therapy instead. All of this accompanied by a lot of NA, which child had attended off and on before. The detox experience made it more serious and child starting doing a lot of NA service, something strongly encouraged because it helps keep people bought in. NA is a very no excuses place; if you take on a responsibility like making the coffee and show up late you can't do the coffee making for a couple of weeks. I continued the twice a week drug testing for a number of months until it became clear things had very much turned around.

In sum, child had history of occasional heroin use that I very ineffectively tried to stem. OD made me realize how ineffective. So what worked: learning how to successfully institute boundaries and consequences, doing regular drug tests, planning ahead for failure (the relapse and ensuing physical dependence), DIY detox, therapy, and NA, lots of NA. Rehab was not particularly useful though lining it up as a consequence was helpful.

What still amazes is that treating the drug problem successfully was pretty much free--biggest outlays was for drug test kits (much cheaper off the internet than at the CVS) and ingredients for cookies child baked for NA. This doesn't include the individual therapy which child insists was helpful, although NA seemed more to do more from my perspective. I gladly would have paid for inpatient rehab but frankly I don't think it would have worked better than DIY and may well have led to less good outcomes.

I am the PP with the nephew. I am so sorry and I know you must be in so much pain. There is hope though. Sending you hugs and love. I know even with 3 years sober and doing so well (goes to meetings every day) he would say, as would his son he is one day away from ODing. It just never totally goes away.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, if it is heroin, you need to ditch the kid ASAP.

There is no saving a heroin addict. It will just end with pain and suffering for the entire family. Change the locks and don't let him in.

You are wrong. I have family members who have been as low as you would like, who are now clean, sober and well-employed.

+1

My father was a heroin addict back in the 70s.He' been clean for nearly 40 years & has been an amazing father (& now grandfather).

Oh My this is so not true. My nephew was a serious H addict and many other things. Homeless, multiple felonies, etc. He is now in a prestigious Engineering BA/MA program and we could not be prouder of him. 8 years of Hell though. The last 4 being the hardest.

Anonymous wrote:Sorry--have BTDT. Have been with my child seizing while heart rate dropped to ten beats a minute wondering if the EMTs would ever make it in time with their Narcan. This may not have been your absolute low point, but it was mine.

I have told no one about this or the addiction problem other than immediate care providers. Child has made excellent recovery and is in college getting nearly all As with heavy STEM course load. The planned career path would be challenging with a history of drug use.

I suppose I could have unloaded on everyone I know that but for Narcan I would have a dead child or some of the worst of the addiction period but it would have been profoundly unproductive.

I would have lost my child's trust--which ultimately, as child liberally acknowledges, allowed me to pull child out of addiction. Think about it--this is your child's health problem; it really isn't yours to share. Beyond that, what good would it have done? There are way too many people out there just dying to hear the worst about your child so they can feel better about theirs and you can bet none of them believe in redemption, of which my child is living (emphasis) proof.

PP I know this is an old post so you might not even be around. But if you are: can you please share what you did to help pull your D.C. Out of this?