Shortly after my DH and I announced our engagement, (about a month) my sister announced hers. I was excited for her, and glad that I had someone to share the prewedding planning with. Fast forward to the actual wedding planning and her wedding was just a few weeks after mine was. There was a slew of drama that came up because I wanted similar colors as she did(really stupid), and I was trying to "get my wedding done quicker to out shadow hers". Got past that, and shortly after I found out I was pregnant. Just had our kid 10 days ago, and now sister announced she's pregnant.
Is it normal for it to just happen this way? It feels like she's following in my footsteps as quickly as she can. She's older than me, and said she still didn't plan on getting pregnant for a few years as to finish school. But BIL said they started trying about two weeks ago. I just don't understand it, it has been making it feel less special to not only me, but our family to be going through so many congratulations so quickly.

So it sounds like OP knew that her sister was going to be announcing her wedding and OP rushed forced her boyfriend to propose quickly so that she could preemptively announce her wedding before the sister could announce her and upstage the sister. Then OP quickly planned the wedding to make sure that her came before the sister and again made sure she was the center of family attention, and finally she got pregnant immediately after her wedding to ensure that her child would be first born and center of the universe grandchild.

What? OP didn't do all that? Things just happened in a natural order? Her boyfriend proposed when he wanted to, they planned the wedding for the best available date that worked for family and that they could get the places they wanted? And they happened to get pregnant naturally?

Is it possible, OP, that you sister did the same? If you didn't spitefully plan everything to try and upstage your sister, then why do you think she did this to you? I think this says more about you than it says about her.

Anonymous wrote:You sound like a wonderful sister...

I feel really bad for your sister. I'm sure you have made her feel like crap for years just because you are a selfish little brat.

Seriously grow up, sorry its about someone else now.

You know what happened to biblical Rachel? Her sister Leah showed up at her wedding in her place AS THE BRIDE and she had to wait 7 years to become wife #2. SUCKS!

Some sisters like to follow their sister footsteps.
my SIL is like that. They follow each other's footstep. It's like they try to outdo what the other one will do, like big wedding and bigger wedding and more demands. One got a big house, the other got a bigger mcmansion and close to each other. They only have 1 kid and 4 ginormous bedrooms and huge basement. My poor brother has to clean a giant house.

My own sister tried don't follow my footsteps. If she did, she would be very responsible. Unfortunately, of all the things she can pick up from me, she got pregnant while single and do not have a job. I got pregnant when I was single but I'm with baby daddy and we are very responsible in many ways.

So, if I have to choose, I would rather have that mcmansion sister...at least we know they are responsible in the financial part.

Anonymous wrote:Shortly after my DH and I announced our engagement, (about a month) my sister announced hers. I was excited for her, and glad that I had someone to share the prewedding planning with. Fast forward to the actual wedding planning and her wedding was just a few weeks after mine was. There was a slew of drama that came up because I wanted similar colors as she did(really stupid), and I was trying to "get my wedding done quicker to out shadow hers". Got past that, and shortly after I found out I was pregnant. Just had our kid 10 days ago, and now sister announced she's pregnant.
Is it normal for it to just happen this way? It feels like she's following in my footsteps as quickly as she can. She's older than me, and said she still didn't plan on getting pregnant for a few years as to finish school. But BIL said they started trying about two weeks ago. I just don't understand it, it has been making it feel less special to not only me, but our family to be going through so many congratulations so quickly.

Wait, your sister announces her pregnancy after child is born? how long should she have waited? Years?

You sound terrible.

Wow, and the worst sister of the year goes to the OP. What a spoiled brat. I feel sorry for your family...

Anonymous wrote:I think it's pretty normal for people in their 20s-30s to experience these milestones in close succession. Aren't you happy your kid will have a cousin close in age? Are you not close to your sister?

+1 Of course it's normal. If we took a pill here, most people got engaged, married and pregnant in fairly close succession. When you meet the right person and are of a certain age, that's just how it goes. And you said she's older than you.

My SIL confided in me that she was newly pregnant the week after my oldest was born. I was thrilled that our kids would be close in age and that I had my SIL to go through first-time motherhood with. Plus my brothers and I all got married within a year of each other, and had kids around the same time.

I guess I'm not understanding why you think your sister's choices are about you.

Anonymous wrote:I think you're both dumb for having babies like 20 minutes after getting married.

I highly recommend it.
I'm 40 with 16 and 14 year old kids, love it.

OP, I am shocked your married sister had sex with her husband and got pregnant to steal your thunder. I think she should not have consummated her marriage for at least a few years to prevent getting pregnant. What a selfish cow!

Please think about how you can cause some drama in her life! Especially during the holidays - make sure you make her miserable.

Anonymous wrote:I think you're both dumb for having babies like 20 minutes after getting married.

They are probably old.

I think you're both dumb for having babies like 20 minutes after getting married.

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Anonymous wrote:My sister planned her wedding 3 weeks before my due date. Have you ever been measured for a matron of Honor gown while 7 months pregnant?

Oops, I meant three weeks after my due date.

So you're upset that she waited until after the baby was born to have her wedding? That seems much better than being in a wedding while pregnant, and how nice that you were on maternity leave and didn't have to take more time off work to be in the wedding. Seems like she was being thoughtful to me.

No, she scheduled her wedding to be three weeks after my due date. I had no idea when the child would be born. As it was I was 5 weeks post partum as "luckily" he arrived early. I was not healed from the birth as it was rough with a 2+ tear one way and a 3+ tear the other. I had stitched up and down the proverbial wazoo. I had to fly with my newborn alone to get there and had to leave him in a hotel for the day with a babysitter until the end of the reception.

I'm confused. Would you rather she have had her schedule her wedding before your due date? Or you think that scheduling three weeks after your due date is not enough time? How long should she have delayed her marriage so that you could feel fully healed from childbirth?

No, actually, she could have scheduled her wedding date whenever. My post was more to the op and that we have little control over what other people do. In retrospect, I should have declined the matron of honor position as the whole week up to and including the wedding was too much for me. I should have flown up a week later and just been there for the wedding. If my child had come on time, I don't know what would have happened. Flying with a two week old and only two weeks post partum would have been even worse.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My sister planned her wedding 3 weeks before my due date. Have you ever been measured for a matron of Honor gown while 7 months pregnant?

Oops, I meant three weeks after my due date.

So you're upset that she waited until after the baby was born to have her wedding? That seems much better than being in a wedding while pregnant, and how nice that you were on maternity leave and didn't have to take more time off work to be in the wedding. Seems like she was being thoughtful to me.

No, she scheduled her wedding to be three weeks after my due date. I had no idea when the child would be born. As it was I was 5 weeks post partum as "luckily" he arrived early. I was not healed from the birth as it was rough with a 2+ tear one way and a 3+ tear the other. I had stitched up and down the proverbial wazoo. I had to fly with my newborn alone to get there and had to leave him in a hotel for the day with a babysitter until the end of the reception.

I'm confused. Would you rather she have had her schedule her wedding before your due date? Or you think that scheduling three weeks after your due date is not enough time? How long should she have delayed her marriage so that you could feel fully healed from childbirth?