"Can man ever be strictly friends with beautiful woman? "

Of course we can. Doesn't mean we won't stop wanting to pound the hell out of them, but it doesn't mean we can't be friendly with them.

I would consider myself attractive, my best friend is a guy and we have never even remotely come close to being sexual in any way. We've been friends since college. We just hit it off from the beginning in a very brother-sister way. He hangs out with my husband without me and I hang out with his wife without him. Sometimes the two of us hang out. In 20 years, it has always been just a friendship (unless he is really good at hiding any attraction to me). It's great to be able to talk to one another about issues with our significant others and get the opinion of the opposite sex (and trust me, if one of us thinks the other is wrong, we let each other know).

Nope, never if he's straight

Anonymous wrote:
I have a coworker who is smart and funny, and very attractive with a rockin' body. We've been friends for a decade and always gravitated to each other in social settings. At one after-work event (and after a few drinks), I confided that she was in an occasional fantasy of mine. I thought I was just acknowledging the obvious and paying a close friend a compliment, but I could tell right away that I had violated some unspoken understanding. In my mind, there was no reason my comments should have any effect on the friendship, but she was clearly uncomfortable with "the Truth". Maybe she preferred the unspoken tension, or thought I was making a proposition (I wasn't).

Probably not the best move if she wasn't the sort to laugh it off. I have had male friends have one to many and hit on me. I slap a hand or laugh it off and don't rub it in their face the next day. Men are men they are run by things other than their brains sometimes. You can't take it all so seriously

Anonymous wrote:
I have a coworker who is smart and funny, and very attractive with a rockin' body. We've been friends for a decade and always gravitated to each other in social settings. At one after-work event (and after a few drinks), I confided that she was in an occasional fantasy of mine. I thought I was just acknowledging the obvious and paying a close friend a compliment, but I could tell right away that I had violated some unspoken understanding. In my mind, there was no reason my comments should have any effect on the friendship, but she was clearly uncomfortable with "the Truth". Maybe she preferred the unspoken tension, or thought I was making a proposition (I wasn't).

That was a dumb move on your part. You made things awkward.

Of course they can. I have friends who I are attractive and who I would theoretically want to hook up with if circumstances were different (mostly, if I wasn't married to an awesome spouse and both I and the friend were interested and available). However, that's not on the table and we both know it, so we are just friends. Not a problem.

I have a coworker who is smart and funny, and very attractive with a rockin' body. We've been friends for a decade and always gravitated to each other in social settings. At one after-work event (and after a few drinks), I confided that she was in an occasional fantasy of mine. I thought I was just acknowledging the obvious and paying a close friend a compliment, but I could tell right away that I had violated some unspoken understanding. In my mind, there was no reason my comments should have any effect on the friendship, but she was clearly uncomfortable with "the Truth". Maybe she preferred the unspoken tension, or thought I was making a proposition (I wasn't).

When I was in medical school, I lived in a house with four other guys. Two of us actually lived together during residency. And yes, we're all still good friends still. But here is the thing, I was definitely more comfortable with them because I viewed them as brothers basically and they sort of saw me as a sister. And yes, while a few of their girlfriends didn't like me, all of their wives are what I would consider good friends now. And they actually were my "brides guys" at my wedding and ended up really becoming good friends with my husband.

So, yes, it happens. But I really think it depends on whether the girl who is a friend can become friends with the actually girlfriend or wife.

And in terms of looks, I would gander that I was a solid 8 during my 20's. Three kids and a busy career later, I would probably call myself a 6 on a good day and a 4 at my worst.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Once and for all, yes. I am attracted to a particular type of woman. You could be gorgeous and it wouldn't matter. No attraction to me.

This is the same for me.

Also, I wanted to comment that I love women and place a very high value on them aside from anything related to attraction. Some of the things I appreciate are:
How far ahead of guys they usually are socially.
Their attention to detail.
Ability to care for people
That they can dance and smile at the same time
Their innate ability to interact and identify with kids
They send cards
Ability to understand complex concepts even when they're of a technical nature

Anyway, I think of more things I like about women everyday.

You don't see any of those qualities in men?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If the woman is average looking, does the calculus change?

In DC average looking is hot because women here are so damn ugly

I don't think they're ugly. Like everywhere else, most are average-looking. They lack glamor, but even that is not everybody's cup of tea.

Anonymous wrote:Once and for all, yes. I am attracted to a particular type of woman. You could be gorgeous and it wouldn't matter. No attraction to me.

This is the same for me.

Also, I wanted to comment that I love women and place a very high value on them aside from anything related to attraction. Some of the things I appreciate are:
How far ahead of guys they usually are socially.
Their attention to detail.
Ability to care for people
That they can dance and smile at the same time
Their innate ability to interact and identify with kids
They send cards
Ability to understand complex concepts even when they're of a technical nature

Anyway, I think of more things I like about women everyday.

Anonymous wrote:If the woman is average looking, does the calculus change?

In DC average looking is hot because women here are so damn ugly

If by growing up you mean becoming celibate, I sure hope not LOL

Anonymous wrote:Do you people ever grow up? Good God!

LOL seriously. Especially in a major city, where people generally take care of themselves etc., there is always going to be some level of sexual tension. WHO CARES. You get over it. Just because I am married doesn't mean I'm not allowed to acknowledge a good looking female friend or whatever. Yes, there are female friends I WOULD sleep with, in an alternate reality or something ... that doesn't mean I'm friends with them because I want to seduce them night and day. I'm sure they feel the same way about me (I've been called a catch, and told I look hot, by female friends). This is natural, we are humans.