Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Meet/Marry them before they are rich. That's how you do it. DH and I met at the top college we both attended. His grades were nearly perfect and he was debating law school or ibanking. AND he knew he wanted a family, even at 22. He's a keeper. Together 14 years, married for 11.

That strategy involves getting these guys to commit while they're still in college and don't know any better about their options in the sexual marketplace [b]when they graduate. Now since women are also encouraged to go "explore" and what not less people are looking for their MRs in college, thats why this is falling by the wayside.

My small-town, unconnected, unknown, debt-burdened, intelligent, hard-working, and ambitious spouse committed to me during graduate school. And yes, now 25 years later and in their late-40s, they would undoubtedly have many options, given that they are well-known in their profession, very well-off financially, and well-connected in their professional circles.

There is no doubt that it helped my spouse's career greatly to have a very supportive spouse all those years. A spouse who did not mind a decade of cheap dinners at home; taking the metro for years because we could not afford a car, and then finally buying a Pontiac(!); buying a modest house eight years in -- a small, post-war colonial in an untrendy neighborhood and an undistinguished suburb -- because that was all we could afford; late hours and weekends spent at work; and only modest expenditures on clothing and extras.

In other words, yes, one can marry a "rich" spouse early on in one's life, but it takes years and years of hard work, support, love, and understanding to get to the "rich" part. That said, once you get there it is a huge feeling of accomplishment for both partners (whether one or both work), because you have finally made it and you did so together. So if you are a young, ambitious, intelligent professional, the best way to "snag a rich spouse" is to help build one up in partnership with you.

Article in WSJ about this.

http://www.wsj.com/articles/SB10001424052702304418404579465244191453008

Start up marriages vs Merger marriages

Merger marriages are what you tend to see on the weddings pages of the Sunday New York Times: highly educated couples in their 30s, both people well on their way to success. Lots of things can be said in favor of merger marriages. The bride and groom may be more mature, less likely to outgrow each other or to feel impelled, 10 years into the marriage, to make up for their lost youth.

But let me put in a word for startup marriages, in which the success of the partners isn't yet assured. The groom with his new architecture degree is still designing stairwells, and the bride is starting her third year of medical school. Their income doesn't leave them impoverished, but they have to watch every penny.

What are the advantages of a startup marriage? For one thing, you will both have memories of your life together when it was all still up in the air. You'll have fun remembering the years when you went from being scared newcomers to the point at which you realized you were going to make it.

Even more important, you and your spouse will have made your way together. Whatever happens, you will have shared the experience. And each of you will know that you wouldn't have become the person you are without the other.

Many merger marriages are happy, but a certain kind of symbiosis, where two people become more than the sum of the individuals, is perhaps more common in startups.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Meet/Marry them before they are rich. That's how you do it. DH and I met at the top college we both attended. His grades were nearly perfect and he was debating law school or ibanking. AND he knew he wanted a family, even at 22. He's a keeper. Together 14 years, married for 11.

That strategy involves getting these guys to commit while they're still in college and don't know any better about their options in the sexual marketplace [b]when they graduate. Now since women are also encouraged to go "explore" and what not less people are looking for their MRs in college, thats why this is falling by the wayside.

My small-town, unconnected, unknown, debt-burdened, intelligent, hard-working, and ambitious spouse committed to me during graduate school. And yes, now 25 years later and in their late-40s, they would undoubtedly have many options, given that they are well-known in their profession, very well-off financially, and well-connected in their professional circles.

There is no doubt that it helped my spouse's career greatly to have a very supportive spouse all those years. A spouse who did not mind a decade of cheap dinners at home; taking the metro for years because we could not afford a car, and then finally buying a Pontiac(!); buying a modest house eight years in -- a small, post-war colonial in an untrendy neighborhood and an undistinguished suburb -- because that was all we could afford; late hours and weekends spent at work; and only modest expenditures on clothing and extras.

In other words, yes, one can marry a "rich" spouse early on in one's life, but it takes years and years of hard work, support, love, and understanding to get to the "rich" part. That said, once you get there it is a huge feeling of accomplishment for both partners (whether one or both work), because you have finally made it and you did so together. So if you are a young, ambitious, intelligent professional, the best way to "snag a rich spouse" is to help build one up in partnership with you.

The best way to snag a rich man is to develop your own credentials and to become financially successful in your own right.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Meet/Marry them before they are rich. That's how you do it. DH and I met at the top college we both attended. His grades were nearly perfect and he was debating law school or ibanking. AND he knew he wanted a family, even at 22. He's a keeper. Together 14 years, married for 11.

That strategy involves getting these guys to commit while they're still in college and don't know any better about their options int he sexual marketplace when they graduate. Now since women are also encouraged to go "explore" and what not less people are looking for their MRs in college, thats why this is falling by the wayside.

Not looking for my "MRS" in law school, but wound up with it along with my well-used JD. How sexist can you be? Would you ever imply that a man went to college or any other school in order to find a wife simply because he married someone he met there?

I did not imply anything sexist. Women used to go to college to find their MRS degree. That was in the 1950s to 60s. Not any more. Its not a sexist comment. It used to happen.

Marrying someone before he or she gets rich usually means finding your partner in college. That does not happen anymore as both genders are encouraged to focus on work and not on finding a mate at their age.

I think people meet their spouses in graduate school but from what I recall a large majority of my graduate school classmates were also married, so prospects were way smaller.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Meet/Marry them before they are rich. That's how you do it. DH and I met at the top college we both attended. His grades were nearly perfect and he was debating law school or ibanking. AND he knew he wanted a family, even at 22. He's a keeper. Together 14 years, married for 11.

That strategy involves getting these guys to commit while they're still in college and don't know any better about their options int he sexual marketplace when they graduate. Now since women are also encouraged to go "explore" and what not less people are looking for their MRs in college, thats why this is falling by the wayside.

Not looking for my "MRS" in law school, but wound up with it along with my well-used JD. How sexist can you be? Would you ever imply that a man went to college or any other school in order to find a wife simply because he married someone he met there?

Anonymous wrote:Meet/Marry them before they are rich. That's how you do it. DH and I met at the top college we both attended. His grades were nearly perfect and he was debating law school or ibanking. AND he knew he wanted a family, even at 22. He's a keeper. Together 14 years, married for 11.

That strategy involves getting these guys to commit while they're still in college and don't know any better about their options int he sexual marketplace when they graduate. Now since women are also encouraged to go "explore" and what not less people are looking for their MRs in college, thats why this is falling by the wayside.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know common wisdom says that you need to be super-hot and submissive with a career in pharmaceutical sales, but that hasn't been my experience. DH is in biglaw and we met in law school, and I still have a pretty serious career. Most of the successful guys at his firm are married to other driven professional women. I don't know many with sugar baby trophy wives.

YET. Wait until they are all in their 50s (and their wives are in their 50s).

We are(!) in our 50s, many of us, and still together. At this point neither our husbands nor our wives are getting any younger, but we are still in it together.

+1 We are retired now. Been together for nearly 30 yrs and growing old together.

Anonymous wrote:Meet/Marry them before they are rich. That's how you do it. DH and I met at the top college we both attended. His grades were nearly perfect and he was debating law school or ibanking. AND he knew he wanted a family, even at 22. He's a keeper. Together 14 years, married for 11.

I agree with you. Marry for love, of course, but also for the shared values and goals, and the potential you see in a classmate or colleague in university or graduate school or your early professional life. The go ahead and build a mutually-supportive life together. DH was a small-town boy from a no-account background, with big-money student debts when we met. But I saw only a nice, intelligent guy, with a hard work ethic, lots of ambition, and big dreams. More than 24 years later, he is what most people would immediately recognize as well-off and very successful.

Meet/Marry them before they are rich. That's how you do it. DH and I met at the top college we both attended. His grades were nearly perfect and he was debating law school or ibanking. AND he knew he wanted a family, even at 22. He's a keeper. Together 14 years, married for 11.

High income does not equal rich.

The profession most likely to become rich is actually that of engineer (school teachers too strangely..). This isn't due to income (which can be good, but not on the same level as finance, consulting, big law, sales reps), rather engineers are good at defense and invest well producing on average 22% more per dollar of investment income than millionaires on average. That is to say engineers have long term thinking, and their profession doesn't require them to spend a lot of money to look acceptable (most millionaire engineers drive hondas/toyotas and most millionares in general own F150's). They're good, boring, stable providers. Plus most of them have no game, so they won't come across as "exciting" and are unlikely to dump you when you get old/fat.

The problem is that engineers are very frugal and are unlikely to be a great sugardaddy from that standpoint.

I did not know he would end up becoming rich. I met him in college. A lot of men at the same college were in the same program that he was. Not all of them were great boyfriend or husband material.

I was considered good looking and I was intelligent. I also was not impressed with jerks and jocks. I was drama-free, did not sleep around, had tons of friends, had a full social calendar and knew where I was going career-wise. I was not looking for a relationship or a hookup. DH was also similar to me. Had his career goals planned and was not looking for a relationship. We became friends first, and our feeling grew. Married out of college for 27 years now.

I was very clear about what kind of person I wanted to be my life partner, and money was not what I was looking for. I could never ever have married, slept with or had children with a jerk. Most of the people on this thread want to marry for money and that means that they are going to attract jerks.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you people for real?

My comments were 100% dead serious.

I have a lot of cash, I'm in my early 40's. I want a hot 25-35 year old woman who is fit/toned, tanned, preferably a nice set of tits (fake is ideal), if not fake, I will pay for the surgery). She needs to look gorgeous in a dress/business suit and be able to carry a conversation with a group of people, someone I'm proud to take to events and can handle their wine. However, she needs to be kinky and playful back when we're home, and aggressive in bed, wanting it all.

I can even go as far as listing out ideal measurements if necessary. If I could truly go online to a reputable site and submit my requirements to get a list of results back and "order" this person, I would be VERY happy.

Two things one can surmise about the previous poster. First, you can be certain that this man has no class. And second, you know that this man does not possess "a lot" of money; otherwise he could (and certainly would) have already "bought" himself a "Barbie" willing to fulfill his adolescent fantasies and fetishes.

The fact that he attempted to hit on a random DCUM poster further proves your point...

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know common wisdom says that you need to be super-hot and submissive with a career in pharmaceutical sales, but that hasn't been my experience. DH is in biglaw and we met in law school, and I still have a pretty serious career. Most of the successful guys at his firm are married to other driven professional women. I don't know many with sugar baby trophy wives.

YET. Wait until they are all in their 50s (and their wives are in their 50s).

We are(!) in our 50s, many of us, and still together. At this point neither our husbands nor our wives are getting any younger, but we are still in it together.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you people for real?

My comments were 100% dead serious.

I have a lot of cash, I'm in my early 40's. I want a hot 25-35 year old woman who is fit/toned, tanned, preferably a nice set of tits (fake is ideal), if not fake, I will pay for the surgery). She needs to look gorgeous in a dress/business suit and be able to carry a conversation with a group of people, someone I'm proud to take to events and can handle their wine. However, she needs to be kinky and playful back when we're home, and aggressive in bed, wanting it all.

I can even go as far as listing out ideal measurements if necessary. If I could truly go online to a reputable site and submit my requirements to get a list of results back and "order" this person, I would be VERY happy.

Two things one can surmise about the previous poster. First, you can be certain that this man has no class. And second, you know that this man does not possess "a lot" of money; otherwise he could (and certainly would) have already "bought" himself a "Barbie" willing to fulfill his adolescent fantasies and fetishes.

How many of these threads do we need? Obviously there is an interest and maybe Jeff should just post a sticky?