Beginning of my marriage, I would've said that it didn't matter how many guys my wife slept with. But, when the kids came along and the sex dried up, it helped that I didn't have to think about how she was perfectly willing to fuck all those other guys but was no longer willing to fuck me.

I dunno. As a guy I don't care if a woman has had one, but just the same really don't want to hear about it. For me, it's not in my DNA to walk into a bar, meet someone, and then have sex after a short conversation. Now if it was a woman friend and somehow we decide that since both of us are not dating someone, we would like to go home with each other, that's different.

The answer to your original question, OP, is "who cares?" As in, "who cares what men think?" Do what makes you happy. That's what matters. And finding a partner who is okay but with your choices.