Anonymous wrote:I hope someone has said this to the OP - DO NOT GET A DOG.

If you are this high maintenance and picky now, what will happen if your dog develops one of these habits? Poor poor dog.

You sound a little too self-absorbed to give love to someone other than yourself.

This is what I was going to say. Even if OP does the right thing by adopting a dog from a shelter or rescue group, she'll return it as soon as it fails to check one of the boxes on her list. No matter where the dog comes from, it should go to a home where it will be loved unconditionally -- not one where it has to meet a strict list of criteria.

We also have a Havanese and he fits all your criteria.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is no one breed that is all of that. Not sure which (if any) of the attributes are qualities that you can live with and which are absolute deal breakers for you.

It would be helpful if you could list your top 10 attributes from most important to least important.

OP here. Dealbreakers: neurotic, hyper, destructive, noisy, aggressive (to dogs or people).

Basically need a calm dog that, as an adult, can handle being alone for 6-8 hour stretches, will mostly lie down quietly while indoors, and will not snarl, lunge at or bite other dogs or people. Prefered size 20-45 pounds.

From your first list I'd stay away from hounds, schnauzers, pit/mixes -terriers [except westies or wheatens], coats that require groomers [unless you have a poodle natural that gets an occasional clip]. I assume you mean the big outdoor trash can since even my perfect behavior dogs did open the lid of a step on and surf the contents. We once had a herding breed that only liked certain other dogs but she just ignored others. Sheltie [hair easy to brush yourself], corgi. From the right lines/breeders those are aussie/border collie lites. We passed on one because we didn't like mom. Go to breeders and meet the mom and their other dogs.

I hope someone has said this to the OP - DO NOT GET A DOG.

If you are this high maintenance and picky now, what will happen if your dog develops one of these habits? Poor poor dog.

You sound a little too self-absorbed to give love to someone other than yourself.

I miss my husky... my first dog but very intelligent and bilingual!

My Cavalier King Charles/Poodle mix meets the qualifications. He is honestly the best dog I have ever had, and I have had six total. I think some of that is just his personality, but others I have met are equally sweet and relaxed.

Thank you for the greyhound replies. Not the OP but thinking seriously about a dog in the next year after a couple years without due to young children and cross-country moves.

I adopted my greyhound from Greyhound Rescue in WV when he was 2 y.o. He died last year at 13.

Given that my dogs actively seek out small children in order to be crawled up, laid on and dressed in baby clothes, I have to disagree that all dogs object to being "mauled" by children. It is quite possible to teach kids to respect the dog without going to extremes.

We adopted our greyhound from James River Greyhounds. He was about 1 1/2 years old. He is 9 now and is doing great! Easy-going sweetheart.

For those recommending retired greyhounds, how much time do you get with them? -- How old are they when you adopt, and how long do they live? Where do you get them?

king Charles Spaniel

No dog is going to have all the traits you request. You honestly don't sound like a dog person.

If you must, I think two totally opposite recommendations would be pug (lazy, good with kids, face is too smushed it to be overly destructive with stuff), or retired racing greyhound (couch potato mellow dogs). The degree to which any dog is going to be mellow or good with kids really depends on the individual dog and sometimes is hard to predict.

You might want to get a 3-5 year old dog. The rescue would know if they have been observed with children, and they are likely to have calmed down from the puppy phase.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is no one breed that is all of that. Not sure which (if any) of the attributes are qualities that you can live with and which are absolute deal breakers for you.

It would be helpful if you could list your top 10 attributes from most important to least important.

OP here. Dealbreakers: neurotic, hyper, destructive, noisy, aggressive (to dogs or people).

Basically need a calm dog that, as an adult, can handle being alone for 6-8 hour stretches, will mostly lie down quietly while indoors, and will not snarl, lunge at or bite other dogs or people. Prefered size 20-45 pounds.

The thing is, these can be individual characteristics, not breed characteristics, so it's hard to know. If you adopt an adult dog, you will have a better idea.

I have a shih tzu that meets all these critera. We adopted him as an adult, though, so it's hard to know how much is his individual personality -- I wouldn't have considered one before we met him.

DNE