Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do not like the exclusiveness. It means someone is left out.

In my experience, rush is a matching process (both the sorority and the women give preferences) and there is a spot in a sorority for anyone who wants to join. Some people may not get their #1 choice but there is a place for everyone.

It's a matching process based on looks, clothes and money. If that's what you value, then go for it.

Definitely was not based on those things at my school. I mean, you couldn't just show up in your pjs with bedhead, but no one is checking clothing labels or anything like that. At my top 25 school most students were highly motivated to do well in school and go on to graduate school/professional degrees. We didn't have time for that nonsense.

It might be different at another school, but please don't blindly apply your bias towards every sorority at every school.

Matching process is an apt description. Those disappointed by the process are likely to lack critical self awareness and know their place.

I fixed it for you.

The Greek system at each school is really different and if OP's daughter likes having a huge group of girls around her all the time, it can be a good way to make friends at first. My school was 60% Greek, which I kind of knew going in but I didn't understand the implications of it until every single girl on my freshman hall rushed, except for a few who were on sports teams. The school ended up being really cliquish with not a lot to do except drink at the fraternities or study, so it was hard to make friends. I wasn't into musical theater, newspaper, or religious groups either, so a sorority was probably a good fit in the end. Hopefully the school OP's daughter picks will have a little more variety, so if she decides in the end to not rush, there will be tons of other ways to be involved. It's that type of thing you don't really find out when you take the tour though.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do not like the exclusiveness. It means someone is left out.

In my experience, rush is a matching process (both the sorority and the women give preferences) and there is a spot in a sorority for anyone who wants to join. Some people may not get their #1 choice but there is a place for everyone.

Actually, there is not a place for everyone.

Actually, at my school anyone who wants to join a sorority will get a spot. Maybe not their #1 choice, but a spot somewhere.

Seems to be the case at most universities I'm familiar with, but I'm sure there are exceptions. In my experience everyone falls into one of four categories.

Loved the Greek system
Honestly never had interest in the Greek system.
Pretends not to have ever been interested in the Greek system, but was unable to pursue due to anxiety or financial considerations and thus possibly resentful.
Disappointed by the outcome of the rush process.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do not like the exclusiveness. It means someone is left out.

In my experience, rush is a matching process (both the sorority and the women give preferences) and there is a spot in a sorority for anyone who wants to join. Some people may not get their #1 choice but there is a place for everyone.

Actually, there is not a place for everyone.

Actually, at my school anyone who wants to join a sorority will get a spot. Maybe not their #1 choice, but a spot somewhere.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do not like the exclusiveness. It means someone is left out.

In my experience, rush is a matching process (both the sorority and the women give preferences) and there is a spot in a sorority for anyone who wants to join. Some people may not get their #1 choice but there is a place for everyone.

Actually, there is not a place for everyone.

At 55, I still use my sorority connections frequently. Whenever I've moved into a new city, joining my alum group means I'm immediately hooked into a community -- and if they are not doctors and dentists and lawyers themselves, they can point me in the right direction of good ones. Once, when my parents were struggling and I was far away, Kappas in my parents' city stepped up and helped me out -- even though they had never met me.

It's called the power of community, folks, and it can be a game-changer in life.

Back at school, it offered me the opportunity for leadership by running for various offices. And I had terrific built-in study groups for those difficult classes, and if I was having trouble in a class, I could find someone to tutor.

People can bitch all they want because they are thinking of movie stereotypes of sororities and their members, but I have found a fabulous, nationwide, lifelong support group.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i was Greek and think it was an incredibly important training ground. Rush and other social functions offer amazing opportunities to learn how to engage with all kinds of people and make conversations (I could probably charm the pants off of that stupid small minded woman who would disown her daughter for joining a sorority.)

Of all the things I took away from my college experience, the social Skills learned in the sorority are the ones I use daily in the workplace. My husband is high level finance, and it's very much the same case. In most careers, you have to have a brain and social skills to advance to leadership positions. CEOs have to go to at lot of parties....

Except engaging with people who were excluded.

Did you not know how to make conversation when you went away to school? And your sorority was where you learned how to make conversation?

Seriously?

I don't know what to tell you. Life isn't fair and every person, sorority or not, self-selects somehow. I'm sure you have excluded someone at some point in your life (probably because they were in a sorority!). All I know for certain is that during rush and other social events during Greek life forced me to learn socializing with strangers skills that I still use (frequently) today. Even coming from a very social family, that time in my sorority helped. I also had a to. Of fun and made great friends. So it was a win for me. Do t k ow what else to tell you..

+1

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do not like the exclusiveness. It means someone is left out.

In my experience, rush is a matching process (both the sorority and the women give preferences) and there is a spot in a sorority for anyone who wants to join. Some people may not get their #1 choice but there is a place for everyone.

It's a matching process based on looks, clothes and money. If that's what you value, then go for it.

Definitely was not based on those things at my school. I mean, you couldn't just show up in your pjs with bedhead, but no one is checking clothing labels or anything like that. At my top 25 school most students were highly motivated to do well in school and go on to graduate school/professional degrees. We didn't have time for that nonsense.

It might be different at another school, but please don't blindly apply your bias towards every sorority at every school.

Matching process is an apt description. Those disappointed by the process are likely to lack critical self awareness.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do not like the exclusiveness. It means someone is left out.

In my experience, rush is a matching process (both the sorority and the women give preferences) and there is a spot in a sorority for anyone who wants to join. Some people may not get their #1 choice but there is a place for everyone.

It's a matching process based on looks, clothes and money. If that's what you value, then go for it.

Definitely was not based on those things at my school. I mean, you couldn't just show up in your pjs with bedhead, but no one is checking clothing labels or anything like that. At my top 25 school most students were highly motivated to do well in school and go on to graduate school/professional degrees. We didn't have time for that nonsense.

It might be different at another school, but please don't blindly apply your bias towards every sorority at every school.

I'll add that sororities were attractive to many people at my school who wanted to have fun in those brief hours outside of schoolwork and other activities/sports, but didn't have time to go socialize with everyone on our large campus to find their social niche. The Greek system was an efficient way to find compatible friends. It wasn't perfect, but most people I know had a good experience.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do not like the exclusiveness. It means someone is left out.

In my experience, rush is a matching process (both the sorority and the women give preferences) and there is a spot in a sorority for anyone who wants to join. Some people may not get their #1 choice but there is a place for everyone.

It's a matching process based on looks, clothes and money. If that's what you value, then go for it.

Definitely was not based on those things at my school. I mean, you couldn't just show up in your pjs with bedhead, but no one is checking clothing labels or anything like that. At my top 25 school most students were highly motivated to do well in school and go on to graduate school/professional degrees. We didn't have time for that nonsense.

It might be different at another school, but please don't blindly apply your bias towards every sorority at every school.