Anonymous wrote:Shoe-free families, if you host a fancy (or fancy-ish, like a christening) gathering, are your guests milling around shoeless in their suits and dresses? I'm not being snarky; just genuinely curious..

Anonymous wrote:I get being shoe-free for the family. I would be annoyed, though, if I had to take off my shoes at someone's house for a social gathering. The reason is that my shoes are an integral part of my outfit, and without them the length would be wrong, the proportions would be off, and the look overall will be unfinished. I grew up in a country where everyone, EVERYONE took shoes off in people's houses and I'm sorry, no one ever looked elegant in a nice dress clearly made to be worn with heels with stockinged feet or SLIPPERS on. It's a wrong look and there is no way to make it right except to add shoes.

Anonymous wrote:I'm sure I will get flamed for this question, but here goes . . . We are a shoe free home (town house) and keep our shoes inside the basement area next to the garage. For those of you that are shoe free, and use some type of cleaning service, do you ask the cleaners to remove their shoes when they come to clean? We have carpet on our third floor and I hate that they are up there with shoes. I suspect there is probably something in their liability insurance that requires shoes, but I have never asked. We are building a new home (renting now) and I really hope to find some private individuals to clean that house and I'll buy them some shoes to wear while they are there! I know, I'm crazy!

Anonymous wrote:We are 100% shoe free, that goes for all guests and all repair people. For guests I let them know beforehand that we are shoe free and ask them to bring whatever they need to feel comfortable (socks, etc.) I do dislike it when I go to someone's house and they demand I take my shoes off and didn't tell me beforehand. I feel that letting all guests know beforehand solves the inhospitality issue.

Anonymous wrote:Shoe-free families, if you host a fancy (or fancy-ish, like a christening) gathering, are your guests milling around shoeless in their suits and dresses? I'm not being snarky; just genuinely curious..

Anonymous wrote:I hate walking barefoot on someone else's floors. I hate seeing FIL stretching his bare feet all over my couch and chairs. At least put socks on.

I hate the sight of feet more than shoes. I slip my shoes off at my door but don't expect others to. I would prefer they didn't, actually. Floors are washable.

Anonymous wrote:How self-absorbed are you as a guest to not notice if a home is shoe-free or not? We regularly host large parties (dinner, wine, super bowl, really any occasion) and have anywhere from 50-100 people in our home. I have yet to see anyone chafe at removing their shoes, and we don't mind if people need to where shoes for medical reasons. If people are declining invites because of our home being shoe-free, we never hear about it, and frankly if you are that socially unaware we don't want you in our home anyway.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hate walking barefoot on someone else's floors. I hate seeing FIL stretching his bare feet all over my couch and chairs. At least put socks on.

I hate the sight of feet more than shoes. I slip my shoes off at my door but don't expect others to. I would prefer they didn't, actually. Floors are washable.

You clearly have larger issues to solve.

Anonymous wrote:I hate walking barefoot on someone else's floors. I hate seeing FIL stretching his bare feet all over my couch and chairs. At least put socks on.

I hate the sight of feet more than shoes. I slip my shoes off at my door but don't expect others to. I would prefer they didn't, actually. Floors are washable.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let's face it-- it's just rude to make people take off their shoes, whether you provide them with new or used slippers or nothing at all. Some people have foot issues, some people's pant legs will be too long and drag the floor without shoes, some people had no idea you would require that and wore the socks with the hole in the toe, and some people chose their outfit because they love the shoes and they want to wear them. The reason doesn't matter-- if guests wanted to take off their shoes they would do so without prompting at all.

Justify it by talking about your floors, the germs on the floor that will kill your kids, or anything else. It's still the equivalent of keeping the plastic slipcovers on and it makes your guests less comfortable, no matter what they say to your face. The point of hospitality is to make everyone feel welcome in your home. Treating them like disease carriers or small children does not make them feel comfortable in your home.

So, no, there is no good way to change to a shoe-free home.

Exactly. I'm involved in a process right now that involves the possibility of interviews in one's home. The people running the program have made it clear that participants should never ask other participants to remove their shoes, even if it is the habit in that home. It is seen as rude and inhospitable and simply not culturally appropriate here. It is never seen as welcoming to put people in an awkward, uncomfortable situation.

Yes, you should know whether to do so without having to be asked. Pro tip: an area with all of the homes shoes neatly stacked, a host not wearing shoes indoor, and clean floor probably means it is a shoe-free home.