Anonymous wrote:

Not our experience in a neighborhood that has lot of Prep, Gonzaga, Landon and Whitman boys. They are still cordial to one another, but they infrequently see one another and rarely socialize.

Kids do not go to school together for 9 years, K-8, and then stop being friends because of the HS they go to.

They may not have a lot of time with all the commitment of HS, but the friendship does not just poof disappear due to HS choice.

You are probably talking about kids that did not go to elementary together and were never good friends.

No. Those friendships slowly dissolve. There's a group dynamic going on.

One just can't show up to meet with a group of your current friends and say. Here's my old friend, Jack. He goes to Landon or GP or whatever)" and then expect the new group to just acquiesce.

That's not the way it works.

Not our experience in a neighborhood that has lot of Prep, Gonzaga, Landon and Whitman boys. They are still cordial to one another, but they infrequently see one another and rarely socialize.

Kids do not go to school together for 9 years, K-8, and then stop being friends because of the HS they go to.

They may not have a lot of time with all the commitment of HS, but the friendship does not just poof disappear due to HS choice.

You are probably talking about kids that did not go to elementary together and were never good friends.

Landon family, here is a question for you. I was interested and disappointed to read the Prep person warn that former friends in Catholic community may exclude us if we choose Landon over Prep. Is that same sort of family exclusion common at Landon? I'm not asking so much about the boys, but rather about how families (ie, adults) treat one another at these schools. TIA.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you suggesting that the Catholic community would ostracize a family simply because the family decided to send a son to Landon rather than Prep?

"Ostracize" is a too strong a word. But attending these Catholic high schools is a big part of what keeps the group together.

There's one poster on here that wishes it weren't true.

Ok, if "ostracize" is too strong, what word would you use? If I'm DC Irish-Catholic, and I choose to send my son to Landon rather than Prep, what will happen to me? Will other people I have known for years begin to treat me differently?

Think of it this way. It's an opportunity for you and your son to develop a whole new set of friends.

These high schools are a way of binding the group together.

Do you understand just how contentious the relationship between Prep and Landon is? They view one another quite negatively and that spills over to the parents too.

Not really. My son graduated from Prep, his friend went to Landon (our next door neighbor), he had other friends go to St. John's, Gonzaga and WJ. It really juvenile to think they are not friends anymore over where they went to HS.

Kids are friends with neighbors and kids from sports team no matter where they go to school. Kids that play club teams make friends from all over.

Not our experience in a neighborhood that has lot of Prep, Gonzaga, Landon and Whitman boys. They are still cordial to one another, but they infrequently see one another and rarely socialize.

+1 Landon family. No love lost between Prep kids and Landon kids. Some play on outside teams together but even then, it is not common.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you suggesting that the Catholic community would ostracize a family simply because the family decided to send a son to Landon rather than Prep?

"Ostracize" is a too strong a word. But attending these Catholic high schools is a big part of what keeps the group together.

There's one poster on here that wishes it weren't true.

Ok, if "ostracize" is too strong, what word would you use? If I'm DC Irish-Catholic, and I choose to send my son to Landon rather than Prep, what will happen to me? Will other people I have known for years begin to treat me differently?

Think of it this way. It's an opportunity for you and your son to develop a whole new set of friends.

These high schools are a way of binding the group together.

Do you understand just how contentious the relationship between Prep and Landon is? They view one another quite negatively and that spills over to the parents too.

Not really. My son graduated from Prep, his friend went to Landon (our next door neighbor), he had other friends go to St. John's, Gonzaga and WJ. It really juvenile to think they are not friends anymore over where they went to HS.

Kids are friends with neighbors and kids from sports team no matter where they go to school. Kids that play club teams make friends from all over.

Not our experience in a neighborhood that has lot of Prep, Gonzaga, Landon and Whitman boys. They are still cordial to one another, but they infrequently see one another and rarely socialize.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you suggesting that the Catholic community would ostracize a family simply because the family decided to send a son to Landon rather than Prep?

"Ostracize" is a too strong a word. But attending these Catholic high schools is a big part of what keeps the group together.

There's one poster on here that wishes it weren't true.

Ok, if "ostracize" is too strong, what word would you use? If I'm DC Irish-Catholic, and I choose to send my son to Landon rather than Prep, what will happen to me? Will other people I have known for years begin to treat me differently?

Think of it this way. It's an opportunity for you and your son to develop a whole new set of friends.

These high schools are a way of binding the group together.

Do you understand just how contentious the relationship between Prep and Landon is? They view one another quite negatively and that spills over to the parents too.

Not really. My son graduated from Prep, his friend went to Landon (our next door neighbor), he had other friends go to St. John's, Gonzaga and WJ. It really juvenile to think they are not friends anymore over where they went to HS.

Kids are friends with neighbors and kids from sports team no matter where they go to school. Kids that play club teams make friends from all over.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you suggesting that the Catholic community would ostracize a family simply because the family decided to send a son to Landon rather than Prep?

No.

There is somebody that keeps posting this "insular" opinion in the Private school forum. They probably live in Bethesda/Chevy chase/potomac area. It's not really like that everywhere else.

Add NW DC/Chevy Chase, Rockville and Kensington to that list and you may have a point. That leaves Gaithersburg, Silver Spring and NoVa and the rest of Up-County.

Gonzaga draws kids from all over the beltway.

Rockville... No. St. Mary's, st.e's, st. judes, st. Patrick's ... not insular.

You must be surrounded by HR and mater dei families.

We chose to go the independent school route vs. our parish elementary for our kids and I definitely feel like some of my former friends have dropped us, or at least made less of an effort despite our attempts to remain close. It was a tough choice for us, but one we felt strongly was better for our kids. And yes, we live in one of the areas mentioned. It is highly "Balkanized" as I've come to realize. It seems that you can't be fully "in" with the Catholic group unless you're fully a part of it in every aspect.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you suggesting that the Catholic community would ostracize a family simply because the family decided to send a son to Landon rather than Prep?

"Ostracize" is a too strong a word. But attending these Catholic high schools is a big part of what keeps the group together.

There's one poster on here that wishes it weren't true.

Ok, if "ostracize" is too strong, what word would you use? If I'm DC Irish-Catholic, and I choose to send my son to Landon rather than Prep, what will happen to me? Will other people I have known for years begin to treat me differently?

Think of it this way. It's an opportunity for you and your son to develop a whole new set of friends.

These high schools are a way of binding the group together.

Do you understand just how contentious the relationship between Prep and Landon is? They view one another quite negatively and that spills over to the parents too.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you suggesting that the Catholic community would ostracize a family simply because the family decided to send a son to Landon rather than Prep?

"Ostracize" is a too strong a word. But attending these Catholic high schools is a big part of what keeps the group together.

There's one poster on here that wishes it weren't true.

Ok, if "ostracize" is too strong, what word would you use? If I'm DC Irish-Catholic, and I choose to send my son to Landon rather than Prep, what will happen to me? Will other people I have known for years begin to treat me differently?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you suggesting that the Catholic community would ostracize a family simply because the family decided to send a son to Landon rather than Prep?

No.

There is somebody that keeps posting this "insular" opinion in the Private school forum. They probably live in Bethesda/Chevy chase/potomac area. It's not really like that everywhere else.

Add NW DC/Chevy Chase, Rockville and Kensington to that list and you may have a point. That leaves Gaithersburg, Silver Spring and NoVa and the rest of Up-County.

Anonymous wrote:Are you suggesting that the Catholic community would ostracize a family simply because the family decided to send a son to Landon rather than Prep?

"Ostracize" is a too strong a word. But attending these Catholic high schools is a big part of what keeps the group together.

There's one poster on here that wishes it weren't true.

Anonymous wrote:Are you suggesting that the Catholic community would ostracize a family simply because the family decided to send a son to Landon rather than Prep?

No.

There is somebody that keeps posting this "insular" opinion in the Private school forum. They probably live in Bethesda/Chevy chase/potomac area. It's not really like that everywhere else.

Are you suggesting that the Catholic community would ostracize a family simply because the family decided to send a son to Landon rather than Prep?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Given the non sequitur posts by boosters here, I'd look at some other schools if I were you.

Lots of other alternatives. But if you are Catholic and if you and your sons want to continue to be part of the DC Catholic community, you might want to consider the short and long term impact of these "other schools" rather carefully.

We are a Catholic family and considering all private schools. What exactly do you mean by this statement?

Well, to get it you have to have a pretty good understanding of the DC "Catholic" community. It's largely Irish and quite insular. Most of them wouldn't dream of sending their kids to non-Catholic private schools. It's bad enough when someone who went to Gonzaga decides to send their son to Prep. They are surprised when one of the community sends their kids to public schools, but assume its either due to a financial problem or because there might be some learning issues. They are shocked when someone chooses a non-Catholic private school. Its seen as a mild thumb in the eye of the group and an indication that the family really isn't as interested as they thought in being part of the larger group.

All these private schools are insular. Once you are there these schoolmates become almost exclusively your child's circle of friends. Old neighborhood and grammar school friendships start to atrophy. And these schools are frequently paired with single sex schools like Gonzaga is with Georgetown Visitation. That's who of the opposite sex they hang out with, go to dances with, and may eventually marry.

But the real key is these schools are where lifelong close friendships for the majority are formed for those that stay in the DC area. And it goes beyond friendships to business and to who your doctor, dentist, lawyer, accountant, real estate person, etc., etc. is.

So, in a way, the decision really is of which group do you want to be a part. And the answer can't be, "All of them". Washington is a highly Balkanized community.