Anonymous wrote:Most men are total babies about bypass surgery and freak out afterword. He needs to grow up.

Another reason to not marry them, fellas.

Anonymous wrote:DH refused to follow doctors' orders. He dropped dead of a heart attack at age 40.

Darwinism takes its course.

You chose him.

Go to therapy.

Anonymous wrote:Depression is very common after bypass surgery or a heart attack.

but so is a clear outlook and understand of why the person ended up where they are. I am willing to bet that is the case because a depressed person wouldn;t bring that sort of thing up.

Anonymous wrote:Depression is very common after bypass surgery or a heart attack.

Yes depression is very common after a life changing brush with death. But, nevertheless, be glad he is opting to try and change things rather than "hanging up his hat" and walking away. Go to therapy!
If you want to save your marriage.

My dad had a bypass and all kinds of emotions and insane behavior came out. He got back to normal (actually much happier) but it took about a year.

If he wants to go to therapy, you should go, OP. So what if you don't want to? It's called Compromise. If you want to keep your marriage, then meet him halfway and give therapy a chance.

Anonymous wrote:He might be going through depression after undergoing surgery...

+1. My dad had this surgery and was depressed after it, too - I think that's very common.

Regardless, I would go to counseling with him. You may not feel the tension but he evidently does, and when someone tells you it's therapy or divorce...you should really choose the therapy!

Not to take away from the issue, but love the term "emotional oppression"

Any update, OP?