Anonymous
Post 05/30/2013 17:37     Subject: Am I being a "martyr"?
You are a self centered slut, OP. Your poor, poor daughter. I hope she gets as far away from you as she can.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2013 17:33     Subject: Am I being a "martyr"?
Anonymous wrote:It's pretty clear you take your 17 yo for granted anyway.


+1 and you DD was correct.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2013 17:31     Subject: Re:Am I being a "martyr"?
Anonymous wrote:Everyone is attacking here, but I wouldn't leave a 17 year old alone with 4 kids. That's not responsible, really. OP should have paid for a baby sitter. OP really loses all credibility by having multiple baby daddies, of course. But If this were a widowed catholic woman with 6 children from the same father, people would expect the oldest DD to take on a lot more responsibility here. When I was growing up in the 60's and 70's, the oldest absolutely had to do the things the OP is describing. That said, OP has been reproductively reckless.


Are you serious???? At 17YO, I was watching my younger siblings - walking them home from school, etc. as was every other 17YO I know who had younger siblings. And this was in the 60's and 70's. How old do you think the babysitter would have been?

Well, her daughter IS doing it and the mother who is sprinkling out these babies is showing no appreciation for it. We all HELPED with our younger siblings but even I, with VERY old school parents, was not commanded to schlep my infant siblings back and forth to the mall if I wanted to go. A widow is a LOT different than a baby mama. Come on!
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2013 17:21     Subject: Re:Am I being a "martyr"?
Everyone is attacking here, but I wouldn't leave a 17 year old alone with 4 kids. That's not responsible, really. OP should have paid for a baby sitter. OP really loses all credibility by having multiple baby daddies, of course. But If this were a widowed catholic woman with 6 children from the same father, people would expect the oldest DD to take on a lot more responsibility here. When I was growing up in the 60's and 70's, the oldest absolutely had to do the things the OP is describing. That said, OP has been reproductively reckless.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2013 17:16     Subject: Am I being a "martyr"?
Anonymous wrote:OP here, I just took them all because she had already dressed them and had them fed. Also, during the doctors appointment she took them to the park downstairs and about a mile away. The kids are 2 mos, 19 mos (one at the appt), 3 yr old twins, and a 6 yr old. And she had a few toys that she packed to bring, I thought they would be okay in the waiting room.


Wow, at your original post I thought how selfish you were. That's not reasonable to ask a 17 year old to babysit 4 or 5 kids to entertain them like that. It is not her job to raise your children. Helping occasionally, ok, but you are raising them, not her. I think you owe her a huge thank you for her help and a little gratitude. She is right. You choose to have 6 kids, they are your responsibility and you should have knowing after the first few how hard it is. If she got them dressed, fed, packed up and in the car, then I am very impressed given I'm not getting what responsibility you are taking for your kids except driving. 4 kids under 3 is way too much to ask her to handle.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2013 16:53     Subject: Am I being a "martyr"?
Anonymous wrote:OP here, I just took them all because she had already dressed them and had them fed. Also, during the doctors appointment she took them to the park downstairs and about a mile away. The kids are 2 mos, 19 mos (one at the appt), 3 yr old twins, and a 6 yr old. And she had a few toys that she packed to bring, I thought they would be okay in the waiting room.


whoa. I haven't read every response but OP, you are in the wrong. Like other PPs have said, why in the world would you take all of them for one child's dentist appointment? When you answererd that, you turned it into your DD's "fault" since she had already dressed them. Yep, you're a martyr. And to accuse your daughter of being "unsupportive" of you when you clearly are not supportive of her is just ridiculous. Look, this may sound harsh but you need to get a grip. These are YOUR children that you signed on to raise, not your daughter's. I totally agree that helping out should be a part of every teenager's life, but I think you are taking advantage of her. Step it up, OP. Take care of your own kids yourself, especially your oldest before she moves away and never comes home.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2013 15:51     Subject: Am I being a "martyr"?
If you think she's a troll, stop feeding her.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2013 15:28     Subject: Am I being a "martyr"?
I'm only on page two but this has got to be a troll.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2013 15:25     Subject: Re:Am I being a "martyr"?
Troll, troll, troll.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2013 15:24     Subject: Re:Am I being a "martyr"?
OP very unfair to you 17 year old. Way to alienate her. Have you considered birth control?
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2013 15:21     Subject: Am I being a "martyr"?
Anonymous wrote:Nope, not a fake post. DD, has a very active social life so don't feel sorry for her. She is acting like a brat. Seriously parents have no spines anymore?

She babysits outside of the family and makes money. I give her an allowance of $70/wk to help out around the house with the kids, the laundry, cooking, cleaning up etc.



Wow. $10 a day for labor that would cost you $100 a day under other circumstances. Granted, there's room and board included, but geez.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2013 15:18     Subject: Am I being a "martyr"?
Anonymous wrote:No, she's not a step child, why? She loves the kids and they love her! The kids are her half brothers and sisters though as they do not have the same dad and I am a single mom.

I just need support sometimes and I do not appreciate the attitude DD gives me sometimes about her responsibilities in this household.

Case and point, the other day DD wanted to go to the mall with a friend. I told her yes but she had to take the 2 DCs with her (2mos and 19 mos). She pitched a fit yelling at me about how she's "entitled" to free time without the kids. I told her she was being disrespectful and I wouldn't stand for it. She actually said "entitled"! Long story short, she ended up taking the kids with her and having a nice day with them at the mall. Like I have stated before, she is being a self centered brat, but I guess that is to be expected from a teenager.

Wow. Just be prepared for her to not really like you when she gets older. It would totally be justified.

You don't sound like a horrible mother, just a self-centered one who is not taking responsibility for her choices. I wish your 17 year old daughter well and I hope that she hatches an amazing escape plan because you have sentenced her to hell.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2013 15:08     Subject: Re:Am I being a "martyr"?
It sounds to me like you should be kissing her ass for watching the little ones all the time. If her form of teenage rebellion is to call you a non-expletive name while she watches your kids in a waiting room, then you are pretty damn as lucky to have her.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2013 15:07     Subject: Re:Am I being a "martyr"?
This can't be real - it just can't be.

If it is OP, you are clueless. Your DD will miss her siblings - but I doubt she misses you.

I hope that you take full advantage of her now. Because I predict when she goes to college, she will be on the first plane or train leaving and no money in the world will get her back here.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2013 14:55     Subject: Re:Am I being a "martyr"?
Your poor daughter. She's sacrificing her teen years for a mother that wants to have more children than she can care for. You're lucky she's as helpful as she is.