Anonymous
10/25/2025 13:40
Subject: SLAC vibes - Middlebury, Wesleyan, Vassar....
Anonymous wrote:I have an athletic, straight son who is politically progressive and socially very tolerant (volunteers with kids who have disabilities, befriended the trans kid in his class who couldn't find a partner for a project, etc). He's considering some SLACs at which he could play his sport. We have visited F&M and Dickinson, both of which seem like decent fits vibe-wise.
What are the student bodies like at Middlebury, Wesleyan, Trinity (CT), Haverford, Occidental, and Vassar? Maybe the Maine ones as well (Colby, Bates, Bowdoin)?
I don't think a super artsy crunchy place will be the best fit for him....he is going to want to find friends who want to watch professional sports, join a fantasy football league, etc, and girls who are interested in dating men. I feel like at a smaller school you really have to make sure it's the right fit.
Except for Trinity, I know all these schools very well. From your description of your son, I would pick Middlebury, Early Decision.
Anonymous
10/25/2025 12:09
Subject: SLAC vibes - Middlebury, Wesleyan, Vassar....
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Wesleyan and Vassar would be bad choices for middle of road kids into dating.
If this is really true, it's a sad commentary on the state of affairs in higher ed today.
It’s not true. It’s a dated stereotype. Sophomore DS at Vassar. He and his roommate both “middle of road” non-athletes, have had a great time dating a variety of women since first week of freshman year. The athlete division isn’t really a thing on campus. Almost everyone goes to the same parties. There is a typical breakdown of athletes, artsy, intellectual, nerds as any big university, albeit on a smaller scale. The bigger challenge is dating and breaking up on a smaller campus, where everyone knows your business and you can’t help but bump into your ex. But they learn quickly how to navigate relationships responsibly. Nobody wants a d-bag reputation.
Doesn’t Vassar have a really high female to male ratio? The world is his oyster! (Or clam!
Anonymous
10/25/2025 12:03
Subject: SLAC vibes - Middlebury, Wesleyan, Vassar....
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Check out Colorado College, too.
But be aware of block schedule: 3.5 weeks of ONE class only. Students typically take 8 courses in one year. Pro: only need to focus on one class at a time. Con: info crammed into 3 weeks
Is this the one where kids bid for classes? How does that even work?
Anonymous
10/25/2025 12:03
Subject: SLAC vibes - Middlebury, Wesleyan, Vassar....
Anonymous wrote:Check out Colorado College, too.
But be aware of block schedule: 3.5 weeks of ONE class only. Students typically take 8 courses in one year. Pro: only need to focus on one class at a time. Con: info crammed into 3 weeks
Anonymous
10/25/2025 11:29
Subject: SLAC vibes - Middlebury, Wesleyan, Vassar....
Anonymous wrote:I think your best bet is to apply to any that might possibly be a good fit, then do admitted student days and make decisions based on firsthand experience. My D26 is applying to Vassar, Wes, Middlebury and while she’s definitely liberal, she’s also in a fantasy football league right now, enjoys watching sports and from the way you described your son, would be good friends with him. All the people who write things like “too woke” etc most likely haven’t had kids at these schools. Personally, I didn’t get a “too artsy” vibe from tours and info sessions as Vassar or Wes (haven’t toured Midd) they just seemed very accepting and diverse. They all sound like good fits for your kid, have him decide for himself which one is his favorite after acceptances roll out.
My DS is ‘26 and is shotgunning most all these schools. He’s an outdoorsy kid who played football until it became clear his calling was in a math class and not on a football field. Wants the LAC experience and will be happy going to any of them, Wes included.
They are all hard enough to get into that he knows he’ll have to take what he gets.
Anonymous
10/25/2025 11:09
Subject: SLAC vibes - Middlebury, Wesleyan, Vassar....
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Have you looked into Washington and Lee? Definitely socially tolerant. Definitely girls who want to date men.
I think my son is a bit of a goldilocks - can't stomach going to a school named after Lee.
Right. Because he's so tolerant. Thanks for making that point again.
You think it’s some big gotcha to equate a desire to live peacefully and respectfully with people of all backgrounds with the celebration of a traitor who led an army bent on maintaining chattel slavery. How embarrassing for you.
You mean George Washington, right?
Continuing to embarrass yourself. Good lord.
Anonymous
10/25/2025 11:04
Subject: SLAC vibes - Middlebury, Wesleyan, Vassar....
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Have you looked into Washington and Lee? Definitely socially tolerant. Definitely girls who want to date men.
I think my son is a bit of a goldilocks - can't stomach going to a school named after Lee.
Right. Because he's so tolerant. Thanks for making that point again.
You think it’s some big gotcha to equate a desire to live peacefully and respectfully with people of all backgrounds with the celebration of a traitor who led an army bent on maintaining chattel slavery. How embarrassing for you.
You mean George Washington, right?
Anonymous
10/25/2025 10:54
Subject: SLAC vibes - Middlebury, Wesleyan, Vassar....
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Wesleyan and Vassar would be bad choices for middle of road kids into dating.
If this is really true, it's a sad commentary on the state of affairs in higher ed today.
It's not true. People who want to date will find people to date at any college.
Anonymous
10/25/2025 10:40
Subject: SLAC vibes - Middlebury, Wesleyan, Vassar....
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Wesleyan and Vassar would be bad choices for middle of road kids into dating.
If this is really true, it's a sad commentary on the state of affairs in higher ed today.
It’s not true. It’s a dated stereotype. Sophomore DS at Vassar. He and his roommate both “middle of road” non-athletes, have had a great time dating a variety of women since first week of freshman year. The athlete division isn’t really a thing on campus. Almost everyone goes to the same parties. There is a typical breakdown of athletes, artsy, intellectual, nerds as any big university, albeit on a smaller scale. The bigger challenge is dating and breaking up on a smaller campus, where everyone knows your business and you can’t help but bump into your ex. But they learn quickly how to navigate relationships responsibly. Nobody wants a d-bag reputation.
Anonymous
10/25/2025 10:30
Subject: SLAC vibes - Middlebury, Wesleyan, Vassar....
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Have you looked into Washington and Lee? Definitely socially tolerant. Definitely girls who want to date men.
I think my son is a bit of a goldilocks - can't stomach going to a school named after Lee.
Right. Because he's so tolerant. Thanks for making that point again.
You think it’s some big gotcha to equate a desire to live peacefully and respectfully with people of all backgrounds with the celebration of a traitor who led an army bent on maintaining chattel slavery. How embarrassing for you.
Anonymous
10/25/2025 10:27
Subject: Re:SLAC vibes - Middlebury, Wesleyan, Vassar....
Anonymous wrote:Nice to see so many informed people pushing back on the Wes stereotypes. It's a great school in both the humanities and sciences and is very diverse socially, with *lots* of bro-y straight dudes doing econ and aiming for finance. What perhaps unites the student body as a group is the "wealthy" vibe it gives off. I have known a number of Wes grads in my profession (academia) and I would have been happy to send my kid there had he chosen it.
My kid’s tour guide at Wes was a veteran (apparently they have a good number of veterans, but I don’t have data). He said he was nervous about whether he’d fit in and feel respected, and was pleasantly surprised by how welcome he felt and how free he felt to share his perspective, which was very different than many students’.
Anonymous
10/25/2025 10:24
Subject: SLAC vibes - Middlebury, Wesleyan, Vassar....
Anonymous wrote:I think your best bet is to apply to any that might possibly be a good fit, then do admitted student days and make decisions based on firsthand experience. My D26 is applying to Vassar, Wes, Middlebury and while she’s definitely liberal, she’s also in a fantasy football league right now, enjoys watching sports and from the way you described your son, would be good friends with him. All the people who write things like “too woke” etc most likely haven’t had kids at these schools. Personally, I didn’t get a “too artsy” vibe from tours and info sessions as Vassar or Wes (haven’t toured Midd) they just seemed very accepting and diverse. They all sound like good fits for your kid, have him decide for himself which one is his favorite after acceptances roll out.
Also, they won’t define “woke.” It’s a moving target. I wonder why that is?
Regardless, my kid at Wes loves it. It’s a welcoming environment (is that what they mean by “woke”? That all people are welcome and treated with respect?) with fantastic academics and so many things to get involved in. The president is one of the few speaking loudly and consistent against the Trump administration’s efforts to destroy higher education. It’s not for everyone, but no place is. Check it out.
Anonymous
10/25/2025 10:24
Subject: SLAC vibes - Middlebury, Wesleyan, Vassar....
Anonymous wrote:Wesleyan and Vassar would be bad choices for middle of road kids into dating.
If this is really true, it's a sad commentary on the state of affairs in higher ed today.
Anonymous
10/25/2025 10:23
Subject: SLAC vibes - Middlebury, Wesleyan, Vassar....
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Have you looked into Washington and Lee? Definitely socially tolerant. Definitely girls who want to date men.
I think my son is a bit of a goldilocks - can't stomach going to a school named after Lee.
Right. Because he's so tolerant. Thanks for making that point again.
Anonymous
10/25/2025 10:15
Subject: SLAC vibes - Middlebury, Wesleyan, Vassar....
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Have you looked into Washington and Lee? Definitely socially tolerant. Definitely girls who want to date men.
I think my son is a bit of a goldilocks - can't stomach going to a school named after Lee.
This is reasonable. I also think people suggesting W&L because it’s “tolerant” in response to a post seeking schools for a progressive straight boy aren’t really listening to your question.
What about Tufts? It’s D3 but twice the size of other NESCACs.
Not Tufts for a heterosexual male hoping to date heterosexual women.
Why not? It’s huge for a SLAC. I’d assumed it wouldn’t be hard to find your crowd there.