Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It's not complex at all. Most people cheat for sex. The fill in the gap for the lack of sex in their relationship. That's a simple desire. The motivation to cheat is not complex. Substantial body of research my a$$. Cheaters aren't talking to "researchers."Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:As a faithful husband I read all these stories about wives forgiving and staying with their POS hubbies and I feel like I am missing something lol..Maybe I should have an affair too cause DW will probably forgive me.
Nah she is the perfect woman for me. There is nothing another woman can/will offer me that my wife hasn't/won't offer me.
Cheating is rarely about finding someone better; it’s far more often connected to unresolved personal trauma or unmet internal needs. [b]The psychology behind it is complex, and framing it otherwise overlooks a substantial body of research on the subject.
So no, not everyone would cheat. Individuals with a stable internal framework generally don’t. But the motivations behind it are still understandable, even to those who would never make that choice.
My xH cheated multiple times despite me wanting sex with him regularly. In fact, I could barely get him to have sex with me - he'd do it once or twice a month to shut me up. He preferred sitting downstairs sexting other women on his phone.
And no, I didn't get fat, didn't let myself go, none of that. The women he cheated with were all fatter, uglier, and older than me (caught him pursuing women as old as 70 when he was early 40s!). I could have been a Victoria's Secret model and slid down a stripper pole, and he wouldn't have been interested.
Clearly being good looking isn't enough. His GFs might be fatter, uglier, and older. But they may also be kinder, smarter, and more interesting than you are.
Not that he seems like a prize.
Nope. Simple. Cheaters have severe character flaws and immorality. Most cheaters "affair down" with a much lesser person who they can feel superior with or be their worst selves with. Liars/cheaters are much more likely to enact deviant behavior with each other.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It's not complex at all. Most people cheat for sex. The fill in the gap for the lack of sex in their relationship. That's a simple desire. The motivation to cheat is not complex. Substantial body of research my a$$. Cheaters aren't talking to "researchers."Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:As a faithful husband I read all these stories about wives forgiving and staying with their POS hubbies and I feel like I am missing something lol..Maybe I should have an affair too cause DW will probably forgive me.
Nah she is the perfect woman for me. There is nothing another woman can/will offer me that my wife hasn't/won't offer me.
Cheating is rarely about finding someone better; it’s far more often connected to unresolved personal trauma or unmet internal needs. [b]The psychology behind it is complex, and framing it otherwise overlooks a substantial body of research on the subject.
So no, not everyone would cheat. Individuals with a stable internal framework generally don’t. But the motivations behind it are still understandable, even to those who would never make that choice.
My xH cheated multiple times despite me wanting sex with him regularly. In fact, I could barely get him to have sex with me - he'd do it once or twice a month to shut me up. He preferred sitting downstairs sexting other women on his phone.
And no, I didn't get fat, didn't let myself go, none of that. The women he cheated with were all fatter, uglier, and older than me (caught him pursuing women as old as 70 when he was early 40s!). I could have been a Victoria's Secret model and slid down a stripper pole, and he wouldn't have been interested.
Clearly being good looking isn't enough. His GFs might be fatter, uglier, and older. But they may also be kinder, smarter, and more interesting than you are.
Not that he seems like a prize.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It's not complex at all. Most people cheat for sex. The fill in the gap for the lack of sex in their relationship. That's a simple desire. The motivation to cheat is not complex. Substantial body of research my a$$. Cheaters aren't talking to "researchers."Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:As a faithful husband I read all these stories about wives forgiving and staying with their POS hubbies and I feel like I am missing something lol..Maybe I should have an affair too cause DW will probably forgive me.
Nah she is the perfect woman for me. There is nothing another woman can/will offer me that my wife hasn't/won't offer me.
Cheating is rarely about finding someone better; it’s far more often connected to unresolved personal trauma or unmet internal needs. [b]The psychology behind it is complex, and framing it otherwise overlooks a substantial body of research on the subject.
So no, not everyone would cheat. Individuals with a stable internal framework generally don’t. But the motivations behind it are still understandable, even to those who would never make that choice.
My xH cheated multiple times despite me wanting sex with him regularly. In fact, I could barely get him to have sex with me - he'd do it once or twice a month to shut me up. He preferred sitting downstairs sexting other women on his phone.
And no, I didn't get fat, didn't let myself go, none of that. The women he cheated with were all fatter, uglier, and older than me (caught him pursuing women as old as 70 when he was early 40s!). I could have been a Victoria's Secret model and slid down a stripper pole, and he wouldn't have been interested.
Anonymous wrote:I confronted him with proof and he immediately went into 10 hours (literally) of telling me everything. 2+ years later I still haven't found out anything he did not tell me that first night so no trickle truthing. His entire demeanor changed like you could actually see the weight of his secret life being lifted off him.