Anonymous wrote:In laws are offering to pay for our two kids to go to private as they are concerned with where things stand with the current education system. We have a rising Kindergartener next year and one in preschool now. I am all for smaller class sizes and opportunities that private schools provide, but DH nor I attended private school. We are not poor by any means, but we do not drive fancy cars and live in a townhouse in NOVA. We both work full time and can't attend lot of the extra curriculars and parent events that I am being told there are. I feel like we are not going to fit in socially and won't have much in common with the other parents, but I care more about their education than anything. Would love some input from anyone in our situation.

So, I am a teacher at a private school and my own children attend the school only because there is a tuition remission for employees, which makes it a possibility for us. There are things I cannot attend b/c I am teaching at the time they happen. There are things I choose not to attend b/c mixing work life with school parent life can be tricky. I know that we will never be able to "keep up with the Jones'". While at times I may feel inadequate b/c we don't live in the right zip code, have a fancy car, or an extra home, etc, ultimately our community is great and my kids are doing well and getting a good education. Look for a school with a community you can see appreciating you. You will know who will and will not.

Yes, we accepted. It's the easiest way for wealth transfer and indirectly helps the school as we'd be on financial aid otherwise.

I wish grandparents would pay. Neither set offers, but they more than offer their criticism at our choices - worst of both worlds.

I'd take it in a heartbeat since they will criticize either way.

They have (we can afford it, so it was just a power play) and no.

Elementary in FCPS is the weakest link. I would stay with private at least through 4th grade. You can switch for upper Elementary or middle school. You dont have to graduate with private school and can even pick one that doesn't have a high school or middle school. That saves a lot of reasons why you dont stay with the private school kids. If you are into Catholic be aware the only sports that are social are baseball and basketball and tennis so if you already dont fit in, being involved in these will help.

Own it Op. If you want private don't hide behind, "it's what the Grandparents want."

This. Know your own mind, Op. Why are you asking here? Be honest with yourself and if it's what you want, admit it.

Anonymous wrote:Ask them to save it for college and send your kids to public

Why would it be an either/or? They probably have enough for both.

Just to add. We just started our kid at private for HS and they have a special grandparents event. They know. You aren’t alone. We took the money. When we have more money, we will pay more and they will pay less.

Bolded not bolder.

Anonymous wrote:In laws are offering to pay for our two kids to go to private as they are concerned with where things stand with the current education system. We have a rising Kindergartener next year and one in preschool now. I am all for smaller class sizes and opportunities that private schools provide, but DH nor I attended private school. We are not poor by any means, but we do not drive fancy cars and live in a townhouse in NOVA. We both work full time and can't attend lot of the extra curriculars and parent events that I am being told there are. I feel like we are not going to fit in socially and won't have much in common with the other parents, but I care more about their education than anything. Would love some input from anyone in our situation.

I would not based solely on the bolder above.

I would want to make decisions about my children’s education. Your wording sounds like your in laws want that right. Thats a no from me as I can see the strings attached.

100% yes.

Absolutely yes.

Op, DH and I both products of public school, we live in a wealthy school district in MoCo, and send our kids to private with grandparents paying. Kids are at a k-8.

I think you can get an amazing education at public or private schools in this area. But they really are different experiences. For our family, we live in a wealthy neighborhood so kids are actually getting more socioeconomic diversity at private school, but I know that’s not typically the case.

We have good friends who have kids in MCPS and there are structural differences in elementary school and middle school. For private school, they get PE every day (in addition to recess), and they get more than 1x per week Art, music, PE, and science class. The class sizes are small and my kids know all the teachers and kids, and the heads of school. Our local elementary was large (120-140 kids per grade) and the kids don’t know all the teachers because their is turnover and they don’t have a chance to meet them all.

In middle school, kids all have to take a language, music, art, PE and a sport. They can take drama and clubs mostly meet during the school day, so kids can participate easily. In MCPS, in middle school the kids get two electives (pick a language or music and then I think there is one you rotate through some subjects) and I don’t think you can do sports until you are older.

From a parent perspective, teachers and admin at private are responsive and will meet with you about your child, including at least 2 in person conferences. At our public elementary, there is only one meeting with the teacher and then some are very good/responsive to email and some are not. My sense from my friends is that parents are not really interacting with the teachers a lot because the parents are not really going into the school on a regular basis - the kids go in alone and then come out as a class but without the teachers.

This may all be different if you are not in MCPS or a different school.

There are smart kids and caring parents in both communities. My friends are very happy with their kids public school education and we are very happy with our private school. We would probably pay for it if the grandparent didn’t, but I’m very thankful they are willing to pay - our k-8 feels like it’s focused on keeping the kids young, and lots of playground play after school, not many kids in middle school have cell phones, and it really feels like a small and caring community.

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Anonymous wrote:In laws are offering to pay for our two kids to go to private as they are concerned with where things stand with the current education system. We have a rising Kindergartener next year and one in preschool now. I am all for smaller class sizes and opportunities that private schools provide, but DH nor I attended private school. We are not poor by any means, but we do not drive fancy cars and live in a townhouse in NOVA. We both work full time and can't attend lot of the extra curriculars and parent events that I am being told there are. I feel like we are not going to fit in socially and won't have much in common with the other parents, but I care more about their education than anything. Would love some input from anyone in our situation.

Oh just stop.

Public schools are great; you are brain-dead.

There is no private school in the DMV that beats public school, particularly in math & science.

I am in the 1% of this country financially, and I would never think like your idiotic in-laws or you.

Yes, some kids need private school. There is nothing wrong with that; however, to say that private is overall better than public, you are an idiot. Go back to your hole MAGA.

This is such a lie. My kids go to public and it's awful. The problems are so numerous I can't even list them. Go to the other school forums to see all the complaints. I'm sure there are top public schools, but it's in the zip codes that don't allow townhouses or apartments (Great Falls and Langley!). Teachers just cannot keep up with the need that students have. Kids are hungry, don't have permanent homes, barely speak English, and the poverty is high for half the kids in my school.

But that’s just life. All over the world, people are hungry, lack basic amenities, and live in poverty. I get that you fear real life but why raise the next generation that way? Kids have to learn to live in the world, as it is. If you don’t like the reality, work to make it better, instead of trying to put your (and your kids) head in the sand.

By this same logic, no one should be living in nice houses, drive nice cars, or eat good food because think about how much worse it is elsewhere in the world!

DP. I personally find a family of 3 living in a 5,000 sq ft house, owning 3 luxury cars, taking multiple long haul flight vacations annually, purchasing $10k handbags, and regularly eating environmentally damaging meat and fish to be disgusting. People who live like this are not normal. It is not desirable. They are empty no matter how much yoga or spiritual retreats they do. They don’t talk to regular people. They are removed from what’s going on in the world in part because if they paid attention, they couldn’t continue to work their lecherous jobs that give them that kind of money.

DP. I’m curious about your meat/fish comment…so all non-vegetarians?

People who eat fetish beef all the time are ridiculous. You don’t have to be vegetarian, but wandering around like your choices are consequence-free is crazy.

WTF is fetish beef?

Glad I scrolled down before typing the exact comment. WTF!!

I'll be honest, half the reason I read these forums is for these Easter eggs

Honestly I keep checking new posts on this thread solely because I keep hoping for an explanation of the fetish beef.

I have faith we will continue to hear the evils of private school and fetish beef.

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Anonymous wrote:In laws are offering to pay for our two kids to go to private as they are concerned with where things stand with the current education system. We have a rising Kindergartener next year and one in preschool now. I am all for smaller class sizes and opportunities that private schools provide, but DH nor I attended private school. We are not poor by any means, but we do not drive fancy cars and live in a townhouse in NOVA. We both work full time and can't attend lot of the extra curriculars and parent events that I am being told there are. I feel like we are not going to fit in socially and won't have much in common with the other parents, but I care more about their education than anything. Would love some input from anyone in our situation.

Oh just stop.

Public schools are great; you are brain-dead.

There is no private school in the DMV that beats public school, particularly in math & science.

I am in the 1% of this country financially, and I would never think like your idiotic in-laws or you.

Yes, some kids need private school. There is nothing wrong with that; however, to say that private is overall better than public, you are an idiot. Go back to your hole MAGA.

This is such a lie. My kids go to public and it's awful. The problems are so numerous I can't even list them. Go to the other school forums to see all the complaints. I'm sure there are top public schools, but it's in the zip codes that don't allow townhouses or apartments (Great Falls and Langley!). Teachers just cannot keep up with the need that students have. Kids are hungry, don't have permanent homes, barely speak English, and the poverty is high for half the kids in my school.

But that’s just life. All over the world, people are hungry, lack basic amenities, and live in poverty. I get that you fear real life but why raise the next generation that way? Kids have to learn to live in the world, as it is. If you don’t like the reality, work to make it better, instead of trying to put your (and your kids) head in the sand.

By this same logic, no one should be living in nice houses, drive nice cars, or eat good food because think about how much worse it is elsewhere in the world!

DP. I personally find a family of 3 living in a 5,000 sq ft house, owning 3 luxury cars, taking multiple long haul flight vacations annually, purchasing $10k handbags, and regularly eating environmentally damaging meat and fish to be disgusting. People who live like this are not normal. It is not desirable. They are empty no matter how much yoga or spiritual retreats they do. They don’t talk to regular people. They are removed from what’s going on in the world in part because if they paid attention, they couldn’t continue to work their lecherous jobs that give them that kind of money.

DP. I’m curious about your meat/fish comment…so all non-vegetarians?

People who eat fetish beef all the time are ridiculous. You don’t have to be vegetarian, but wandering around like your choices are consequence-free is crazy.

WTF is fetish beef?

Glad I scrolled down before typing the exact comment. WTF!!

I'll be honest, half the reason I read these forums is for these Easter eggs

Honestly I keep checking new posts on this thread solely because I keep hoping for an explanation of the fetish beef.