Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My oldest is 12, so we are not there yet but I wouldn't. Anything could go wrong (break in, carjacking, a stalker who observes that a young girl is alone in the house at night, a fire, etc). I'd take her or have your older son come stay with her.

Would you leave an 18 yo alone? 22? 35?
Those events can happen to anyone, hopefully they have tools and plans but sometimes misfortune happens, a fire can even happen with parents in the house. A 26 y o alone could fall down the stairs!

Agree. If our house is broken into in the middle of the night by a crazed killer I doubt anything would be different if I was here vs. just my daughter. Ditto the same for a rapid fire. And I have no idea what carjacking has to do with leaving a kid home alone.

Signed, a mom who has left her 15 year old home alone overnight on more than one occasion.

Anonymous wrote:We left them alone but they could only make food in the microwave and the toaster oven (both with timers so would turn off).

Cooking on a hot stove is probably the most dangerous thing to do in the house.


We also had her call us everyday after showing, as that’s the second most dangerous thing.

Agreed, in college you will have neighbors, RAs, maybe even roommates. As a solo in a SFH you are very isolated.

Are you kidding!? She is almost an adult.

I have a 17 year old DD - I would definitely be comfortable leaving her.

Anonymous wrote:DH has a work trip that he’d like me to attend a few hours away from where we live . DD17 doesn’t want to come along. I’m not sure if we should let her stay alone. She’s not a partier so I’m not worried about that. But, we’ve never left her alone overnight before. She’s willing to stay alone and is responsible. I guess I’m just overly anxious. So considering all this, should we?

Overly anxious about what? This shouldn't even be a question

Yes

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP: She did just turn 17 and is a junior not senior. I have a 25 year old DS who lives very close who can check up on her and is close by in case of an emergency, or if I still don’t
comfortable with her being alone, she can stay with DS or he can come over to stay with her.

I am in the exact same boat. Both DH and I need to be gone for 5 nights. 20 yr old DS is also 30 min away (an hour with traffic), so she can stay with him on the weekend, but she has to be in school the other two days so she has to be home. DD said she would be fine, but I don't feel comfortable with it as she has anxiety and panic attacks. Yes, she's on meds. She just turned 17. I might call her aunt to stay with her for 2 nights, so DD would only be alone at night for 1 night.

I mean this nicely, but don't you think you're sending her the wrong message if she says she can handle it and you send the aunt over?

She is currently going through a really rough patch right now. She lost her entire friend group; has been having panic attacks; crying. She is also an anxious person, and yes, I do worry about her going off to college, but as PPs have stated, she will not be alone in the dorm building by herself. There are other people in the building. If she was alone in the building, she'd freak out. We have a largish sfh.

She texted me today that she was in the counselor's office, having a meltdown.

No, I don't think she should be alone at night right now. We'll see how she feels next week.

My oldest yes. Even if he had people over, it would only be a couple and they would play video games and order pizza. He is an introvert who doesn't like a lot of people so he isn't going to have a party.

The younger one is 15 and I wouldn't leave her alone yet. She has a large gaggle of friends and acquaintances and isn't particularly mature or thoughtful. She wouldn't intentionally do something crazy but she might end up in a crazy situation before she realizes what is happening. Her decision making isn't always stellar!

Yes, and I’d let them have a friend stay over.

Anonymous wrote:
I would be ok leaving one of my children home for two days. She's responsible. However, I wouldn't leave my other child home because she engages in high-risk behavior and hangs with friends with similar behaviors. I have no doubt she would have a party at the house.

I also have one that would leave home and one who is 14 who I'll be unlikely to ever leave home. She is just like me and I had my share of parties.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My oldest is 12, so we are not there yet but I wouldn't. Anything could go wrong (break in, carjacking, a stalker who observes that a young girl is alone in the house at night, a fire, etc). I'd take her or have your older son come stay with her.

Would you leave an 18 yo alone? 22? 35?
Those events can happen to anyone, hopefully they have tools and plans but sometimes misfortune happens, a fire can even happen with parents in the house. A 26 y o alone could fall down the stairs!

18 is an adult. When your child is still 17 years and 364 days old you have a legal responsibility to make a good faith effort to keep them safe. While most teens can stay home alone safely at that age, one with a history of "issues" should be guarded more closely. Whenever you are tempted to be a lax parent with your teen because you want to be a "cool" parent, try to imagine justifying your choices in front of a judge. Hope that helps.

Op did not say this teen has issues and "issues" continue through adulthood

Your legal liability is what you need to consider at all times. These weirdos who claim that they stop keeping track of their kids once they hit high school are not a model to follow. Many 15 yos can be safely left alone over the weekend and many 17 yos cannot. You must understand what level of supervision your particular child needs so that you do not get in trouble for negligence.

I let my 17 year old DD do it once. I made her head home from hanging out with friends early--TBH I was mostly worried about her parking and entering our house from our pretty secluded driveway in the dark.

Anonymous wrote:My oldest is 12, so we are not there yet but I wouldn't. Anything could go wrong (break in, carjacking, a stalker who observes that a young girl is alone in the house at night, a fire, etc). I'd take her or have your older son come stay with her.

This sounds like a mom who tells kids if they get a job they will be mugged walking to car to keep them at home in a weird dependent relationship.

I would be ok leaving one of my children home for two days. She's responsible. However, I wouldn't leave my other child home because she engages in high-risk behavior and hangs with friends with similar behaviors. I have no doubt she would have a party at the house.

This thread amply demonstrates why you shouldn't ask DCUM things.

You are selfish. Stay home.