Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD is high stats and has zero desire to attend college with a bunch grinders on the spectrum. These are the kind of classes that the T20 have cultivated with their excessive EC requirements and focus on "pointy".

+1000 We see this over and over when we visit the top 20 schools.

Are you guys talking about the Asian nerds that dominate top 10 campuses? Yeah they're grinders and have taken over most of the clubs too.

It is not just top 10 schools. It most of the top 20.

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Anonymous wrote:This suggestion will naturally strike many as gross, but I would try to find out via discreet googling if the school has a "phantom s***er" problem. Let me explain.

When I was in college, I had a friend at one of the Seven Sisters who would complain to me about how someone (or someones) would defecate in the middle of hallways in the dead of night as some kind of sick revenge on the college community.

I didn't think much of it, but when I told the story to some of my study abroad classmates, about a third of them said the same thing happened at their colleges. Apparently, at least in the 00s, this was A Thing at some institutions.

So, if you can avoid schools where this happens, that would be a good idea.

One of the better pieces of advice I’ve seen on here

My kid read similar reports from Cornell when she was applying.

Well, looks like there are tons of options, and if you have the $$$ to spend on your kid’s tuition, then they even have more options to find a good fit.

We are lucky here in the US, where finding a good “fit” can be a priority. Students in other countries just go to the best /closest / highest ranked / affordable university and make the best of it. “Will my child be happy, find friends?” is usually not a concern. And yes, I am aware, students tend to live at home or on off campus housing, and they don’t have athletics, so the colleges are usually not selling an “experience” as much as they do here.

I feel here, in the US, we have to help our kids know who they really are, how they socialize (if at all), what kinds of extracurriculars are they drawn to, will they handle very cold/hot weather. I think some students are just caught up in the rat race to outperform their HS peers in the acceptance game, and loose sight of finding a good fit. I believe as parents, we should guide them but also, how much is too much? Then again, they can always transfer.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD is high stats and has zero desire to attend college with a bunch grinders on the spectrum. These are the kind of classes that the T20 have cultivated with their excessive EC requirements and focus on "pointy".

+1000 We see this over and over when we visit the top 20 schools.

Are you guys talking about the Asian nerds that dominate top 10 campuses? Yeah they're grinders and have taken over most of the clubs too.

University of Michigan has been terrific for these very reasons. Fun, positive social life combined with strong academics.

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Anonymous wrote:So much has been made of wanting kids to be at a place where they are with a cohort of intellectual peers. With the poor mental health epidemic on college campuses, where’s the discussion on the kids’ mental health? My kid is surrounded by very driven peers at their T-25 but I constantly remind them they cannot function well without balance and perspective. I want my kid to be challenged but I also want them surrounded my classmates who are kind, thoughtful and well-adjusted. It’s sad how campus communities are now seen more as professional networks instead of a source of social/emotional support not just during college but beyond as well.

Warm weather schools also help with mental health as opposed to cold, grey and long winter schools. A consideration for many considering colleges.

This often is a very important factor for some, but not all, students.

Check sunbelt suicide rates.

The weather is important, but I place more emphasis on the surroundings of the school.

Based on my observations and experiences, I prefer a school that is in a big & safe city, or at least very close to one.
Having social opportunities outside of academic time in the city is a huge plus.

After a long day of intense academic work, even a quick engagement with the city's infrastructure can be a great relief, enjoyable, and offer insights into adult life. The city makes all of this easier, without needing to plan a dedicated trip.

My daughter hates cities. She hates the smells, the crowds, and the noise. See how that works?

It sounds like she has sensory issues and is probably on the spectrum.

Not the PP, but wth? My entire family hates cities and we have no "sensory issues". What a leap. Some people simply enjoy space and fresh air as opposed to crowded, dirty, noisy cities.

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Anonymous wrote:Social was our #1 priority in choosing schools. This is what people mean by "fit."

+1

Same. There are highly intellectual kids at most schools.

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Anonymous wrote:So much has been made of wanting kids to be at a place where they are with a cohort of intellectual peers. With the poor mental health epidemic on college campuses, where’s the discussion on the kids’ mental health? My kid is surrounded by very driven peers at their T-25 but I constantly remind them they cannot function well without balance and perspective. I want my kid to be challenged but I also want them surrounded my classmates who are kind, thoughtful and well-adjusted. It’s sad how campus communities are now seen more as professional networks instead of a source of social/emotional support not just during college but beyond as well.

Warm weather schools also help with mental health as opposed to cold, grey and long winter schools. A consideration for many considering colleges.

This often is a very important factor for some, but not all, students.

Check sunbelt suicide rates.

The weather is important, but I place more emphasis on the surroundings of the school.

Based on my observations and experiences, I prefer a school that is in a big & safe city, or at least very close to one.
Having social opportunities outside of academic time in the city is a huge plus.

After a long day of intense academic work, even a quick engagement with the city's infrastructure can be a great relief, enjoyable, and offer insights into adult life. The city makes all of this easier, without needing to plan a dedicated trip.

My daughter hates cities. She hates the smells, the crowds, and the noise. See how that works?

It sounds like she has sensory issues and is probably on the spectrum.

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Anonymous wrote:DD is high stats and has zero desire to attend college with a bunch grinders on the spectrum. These are the kind of classes that the T20 have cultivated with their excessive EC requirements and focus on "pointy".

WTF are ”grinders in the spectrum?”

DP. Half the Ivy kids. Tons in Silicon Valley.

I wish I knew as much as people on here, to have such astute observations and firsthand knowledge of literal percentages of a student bodies at eight different schools.

Or, your kid is just average. It’s okay, mine is too.

I think you just need to go on a few top20 college tours to see this played out in front of you. It's pretty obvious when you see the kids.
It's even more apparent at accepted student events. My kid committed to an Ivy and we recently went to an accepted student summer reception and I would say that 75% of the kids I talked to were on the spectrum.

This is what the AOs want, this is what they get. We saw it too. There was no way my DC would have been happy at one of these schools. We visited many top 20 schools. Dartmouth was one of a handful of top 20 schools that had more of a “normal, smart kid” vibe, but the rural isolation was just too much. My social, really smart kid opted for a top public flagship. I wonder of the professors and AOs notice how the school population and vibe has changed so drastically?

Anonymous wrote:DD is high stats and has zero desire to attend college with a bunch grinders on the spectrum. These are the kind of classes that the T20 have cultivated with their excessive EC requirements and focus on "pointy".

+1000 We see this over and over when we visit the top 20 schools.