I went to two colleges.

One was local, similar to GMU. I just did everything on my own, including shopping. I don't think my parents even knew when classes began.

Then I transferred to the big state flagship (UVA type school) my second year. I just loaded everything into my little 4 speed hatchback, including furniture, and off I went, moving myself in, finding my own place to live with a friend and finding a job to put myself to put myself through school. I even filled out the financial aid forms myself.

My little sister helped me lift my dresser into the car. My mom made me my favorite meal, and off I went. I don't think my dad was there to say goodbye. I think I even checked my own tires and fluid before hitting the road.

Early 1990s.

How different things are today.

We (including me) really baby-fy our yound adults.

It is probably not good for them for us to make them so dependent on us for even basic adult life skills.

For perspective, my dc will be moving into his freshman dorm at a university that is IN OUR CITY.

So, we will be staying infinite nights.

When we dropped our son off at Haaaavard we stayed two days. Then we came home and got on DCUM and looked for threads where we could say Haaaaavard.

Anonymous wrote:we did two nights. arrived at 10pm. move in that next morning. there were school-related activities (parents had a separate schedule from kids .. this may be bs at your school, was not at ours). I had a meeting the next morning with the development office (wasn't instigated by me, you can be sure). Left that day around 2pm.

Both Harvard and Yale have parents programming people stay for fwiw.

Northwestern has parent programming, that culminates with a March through the Arch with the pep band and speakers. It is the morning after move in.

Anonymous wrote:Yeah, only two hours away, zero nights.

Unless they have an early move in slot.

Then, get a room the night before.

Do what works for you regardless of other opinions. Even if you don’t see your kid who will be busy with Orientation, you might enjoy a quiet night at the hotel and a nice breakfast out. Your DC might have a couple things they want you to pick up at Target and drop off on day two. Happens all the time, no judgment.

Anonymous wrote:We are staying 3 nights. Don’t expect to see my kid after we drop him off at his room. But we are driving 20 hours each way. So, the extra night is for much needed rest before turning around and heading back.

20 hours?! Why are you not flying and getting stuff there?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are staying 3 nights. Don’t expect to see my kid after we drop him off at his room. But we are driving 20 hours each way. So, the extra night is for much needed rest before turning around and heading back.

If it's a 20 hour drive, why not just fly?

With the contents of a heavily packed car?

You don’t need to drive everything there. Our son went to a school that was 10 hours away. We flew there and checked large duffle bags. It was free on Southwest. Airport was 15 minutes from school.

Rented a car. Had dorm bedding shipped to school that we order from a college dorm outfit place. You could also order items on Amazon and have it shipped to a locker in the college town. There were a few items that he still needed, so we made a Target run with the rented car.

Easy peasy.

+1. Have done this for multiple children including twins whose schools were 11 and 17 hours away in opposite directions from our home. Going to do it again next month for next younger kid, school is about 16 hours away. I will fly with him and rent a car.

It boils down to three lists: (1) things we bring from home (4 duffles max, plus student's rolling carryon; one duffle holds all the washed bedding), (2) things we buy there at Target (fly in a day early for shopping, knowing exactly which items are available at which Targets, often further from the college because college Target will be out of stock), and (3) things we order on Amazon to be shipped to hotel (probably foam mattress pad and one or two other things). A little organization goes a long way.

To be clear, this response is for the PP driving 20 hours, not OP who is only driving 2 hours.

Did this cost more than driving? How much for three people? What if bringing things from home is less expensive than buying all new, even from Target?

Depends on how cheap you need to be. A third person would cost more (another plane ticket). In part the difference would depend on how many hotel nights and in how many rooms. Compare to what time flights are available in the morning. 2 or 3 people can split the driving on a 16 hour trip and do it in one day would avoid a night each way in a hotel, though you are still getting a hotel at the destination for at least one night, probably two, and that is a lot of driving. More sane driving, one hotel night halfway there and one hotel night halfway back.

Best you price it out yourself for your particular circumstances and preferences. Include the cost of gas.

We do mostly take stuff from home on the plane in duffles, two per person for parent and student (note that Southwest will no longer have free bags). Probably spent a couple hundred dollars at Target, etc. We are full paying 95k/yr, so this is not a big deal. Different financial situations call for different approaches.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:dont miss Yale's Opening Days. After move in, there are all the receptions for various groups (intl, jewish, ROTC . we were none), but def go to the residential college reception and the family dinner.

then the next day the Assembly (bring nice-ish clothes) and then the family lunch.

they're pretty clear on when you should leave, think it's 2pm on the second day, after the lunch.

Yea we get it. Your kid went to Yale. We’re all impressed.

NEVER CHANGE, DCUM! 😂😂😂

I went to college 4 hours away. My parents dropped me off and left. Everyone’s parents were taking their kids out to dinner that night. Luckily- a girl I met at orientation invited me out to eat with her parents.

This was 30 years ago- but I wish my parents had stayed for that…

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:dont miss Yale's Opening Days. After move in, there are all the receptions for various groups (intl, jewish, ROTC . we were none), but def go to the residential college reception and the family dinner.

then the next day the Assembly (bring nice-ish clothes) and then the family lunch.

they're pretty clear on when you should leave, think it's 2pm on the second day, after the lunch.

Yea we get it. Your kid went to Yale. We’re all impressed.

Wow. You are pathetic. This anonymous poster really gets a lot of street cred by announcing here their kid went to Yale. I'm sure it is the highlight of their day. Much as your sad attempt to make a funny was the highlight of yours. In your case I would say get out of town ASAP so you don't embarrass your child.

What a crazy response. PP was funny.

Wow. Responding to support yourself. That is even sadder.

I’m a different poster. You can check with Jeff. You are even more pathetic than I realized! It’s okay that you and your loved ones have named dropped! You can always reform.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:dont miss Yale's Opening Days. After move in, there are all the receptions for various groups (intl, jewish, ROTC . we were none), but def go to the residential college reception and the family dinner.

then the next day the Assembly (bring nice-ish clothes) and then the family lunch.

they're pretty clear on when you should leave, think it's 2pm on the second day, after the lunch.

Yea we get it. Your kid went to Yale. We’re all impressed.

Wow. You are pathetic. This anonymous poster really gets a lot of street cred by announcing here their kid went to Yale. I'm sure it is the highlight of their day. Much as your sad attempt to make a funny was the highlight of yours. In your case I would say get out of town ASAP so you don't embarrass your child.

What a crazy response. PP was funny.

Wow. Responding to support yourself. That is even sadder.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:dont miss Yale's Opening Days. After move in, there are all the receptions for various groups (intl, jewish, ROTC . we were none), but def go to the residential college reception and the family dinner.

then the next day the Assembly (bring nice-ish clothes) and then the family lunch.

they're pretty clear on when you should leave, think it's 2pm on the second day, after the lunch.

Yea we get it. Your kid went to Yale. We’re all impressed.

I am impressed. And it’s a specific example that while people who are just doing a drive by might be fine for THEM but is hardly universal advice

Stay zero nights. Help move in and go home!!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:dont miss Yale's Opening Days. After move in, there are all the receptions for various groups (intl, jewish, ROTC . we were none), but def go to the residential college reception and the family dinner.

then the next day the Assembly (bring nice-ish clothes) and then the family lunch.

they're pretty clear on when you should leave, think it's 2pm on the second day, after the lunch.

Yea we get it. Your kid went to Yale. We’re all impressed.

Wow. You are pathetic. This anonymous poster really gets a lot of street cred by announcing here their kid went to Yale. I'm sure it is the highlight of their day. Much as your sad attempt to make a funny was the highlight of yours. In your case I would say get out of town ASAP so you don't embarrass your child.

What a crazy response. PP was funny.