Anonymous
Post 07/05/2025 16:09     Subject: Re:If you’re a single woman having an affair with a married man
Why don't we hear a lot from the men who are having affairs with married women?


I can give you my story. I was freshly divorced and met a woman ("Betty") via OLD. She stayed over on our first date, and I thought this was going to be great. However, I started noticing things were off. For example, we never went to her place. She said it was because her soon-to-be ex-husband still had to live with her so he could stay on her health insurance. Additionally, she would only call at specific times of the day (I believe she could only call during her commute home). I figured out that she might get a divorce "someday", but that day was not anytime soon, and for right now, she was married.

However, she was very submissive and did not care if our "dates" were limited to dropping by my apartment when we were free. She had no boundaries that I ever found, and it was a perfect form of NSA fun. It got old quickly when I started seeing other women, and I found I could get everything I got from her from them without any creepy "I'll call today at 5:10 to plan a 6:15 hookup" vibe.

I ended it by stopping picking up when she called at 5:10.
Anonymous
Post 07/05/2025 15:37     Subject: If you’re a single woman having an affair with a married man
Anonymous wrote:Why don't we hear a lot from the men who are having affairs with married women?


Very fair question ..
Anonymous
Post 07/05/2025 15:01     Subject: If you’re a single woman having an affair with a married man
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:So many posts seem to assume these relationships are all the same. There's probably more variation.

I'm 45yo married man with kids. There has been no intimacy of any kind in my marriage for years. We generally get along, we're good co-parents, but deep down, both of us are very unhappy with our marriage and are staying together only for the kids right now. Meanwhile, my AP is divorced, same age as me, and also has kids. We met many years ago and became friends. Over time, the conversations became deeper and the friendship became more real. Eventually, romantic feelings developed, and after a long period dancing around the issue, we gave in to those feelings. She knows what's going on in my marriage because I've been talking to her about it for years. She knows I'm not b.s.-ing her just to get her into bed or stringing her along. I would never have considered doing this if I didn't feel like I'd exhausted all other options with my wife, and I think my AP has the same view. We like being together. Neither of us has any concrete expectation about where this will go. She's not looking for a permanent partner any more than I am, but we do genuinely care about each other and enjoy our time together.


Agree, not every case is black and white. I was faithful for 20 years to DH, but we had problems from the beginning that worsened over time. Eventually I wanted to pursue a divorce that put our kids first, he wanted scorched earth. My AP is divorced and understands what the collateral damage would be to me and my kids. I wish that I had a clean break, but it wouldn't be, and I'm not willing to put my teens through the hell DH would cause.


I understand that you're saying it's the lesser of two evils, but it's like you're building a big old bonfire for your husband to light when he finds out. A guy who's too spiteful and horrible to divorce without cheating on him isn't going to provide a nice experience when he finds out he was cheated on.

And while I believe your husband is probably not the greatest, using that as justification means everyone who wants to cheat can just say, "Oh but my spouse is too spiteful to divorce." If we can dehumanize other people to get out of treating them right, there will always be people who do that.
Anonymous
Post 07/05/2025 14:45     Subject: If you’re a single woman having an affair with a married man
Anonymous wrote:Someone I considered a friend is having an affair with a married man, and this has made me lose all respect for her - they were hooking up until about a week and a half ago and his wife had a baby last weekend. I think she’s pathetic, he’s pathetic, and the situation overall is pathetic.

She’s never had a great time with relationships, and is frankly a difficult person to deal with in general. That she’s mid-forties, never been married (nor asked), no kids, no career - I think it all speaks for itself. I’m ending the friendship.


I think a lot of women are very vulnerable to men's advances that they may want to admit. There is something in the woman's brain that makes her put asides all morals etc when the right man hits it with her. He can married, unattractive, poor, rich, short, tall, fat, a thief, gangster it doesn't matter. If this guy captivates her attention that's it.
Anonymous
Post 07/05/2025 14:40     Subject: If you’re a single woman having an affair with a married man
This thread proves that a lot of people men and women should have never been married to begin with. Some of the posts here are just sad to read. All of that could have been avoided had they stayed unmarried. Folks marriage is not mandatory lol. I will never cheat on my wife no matter what happens in our marriage. It took me awhile before I decided to marry DW 20 years. I needed to make sure she would be the last woman I would sleep with, love, and have children with. When we were dating we both made sure we knew each other well. We didn't rush to get married. 20 years in we are deeply in love and I do not see that changing.
Anonymous
Post 07/05/2025 14:37     Subject: If you’re a single woman having an affair with a married man
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:So many posts seem to assume these relationships are all the same. There's probably more variation.

I'm 45yo married man with kids. There has been no intimacy of any kind in my marriage for years. We generally get along, we're good co-parents, but deep down, both of us are very unhappy with our marriage and are staying together only for the kids right now. Meanwhile, my AP is divorced, same age as me, and also has kids. We met many years ago and became friends. Over time, the conversations became deeper and the friendship became more real. Eventually, romantic feelings developed, and after a long period dancing around the issue, we gave in to those feelings. She knows what's going on in my marriage because I've been talking to her about it for years. She knows I'm not b.s.-ing her just to get her into bed or stringing her along. I would never have considered doing this if I didn't feel like I'd exhausted all other options with my wife, and I think my AP has the same view. We like being together. Neither of us has any concrete expectation about where this will go. She's not looking for a permanent partner any more than I am, but we do genuinely care about each other and enjoy our time together.
The coward has entered the chat.


The but but, but we are different story is so the same.

They can’t just admit they follow toxic pattern and they have to pretend that they are different than everyone else better.
Anonymous
Post 07/05/2025 14:34     Subject: If you’re a single woman having an affair with a married man
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:AP here. He’s married I suspect he’ll stay that way. His kids and their wellbeing are very important to him. He even has a loving realtionship with his wife which is good everywhere except for attraction and sex. She rejects him for sex constantly and he’s not sure he can get erect for her anymore anyway without help from meds. I’m just out of a long term relationship and don’t want anything serious. We both get good, really good, sex and neither of us are interested in it going any further. So, yeah, I’m hanging out with friends on the 4th but I don’t currently feel like I need more.


Some women are incredible. This piece of sh**t here knowingly f**g a married man goes as far as saying yeah he cares about his kids and wife b**ch how about you go find another man who is not taken. A woman will destroy another woman's lofe and not be bothered by it 1 second.


No the AP is not married stop blaming them

The person who is married is the trash


And the person having sex with trash is …?



Your spouse…
Anonymous
Post 07/05/2025 13:49     Subject: Re:If you’re a single woman having an affair with a married man
Agree, not every case is black and white. I was faithful for 20 years to DH, but we had problems from the beginning that worsened over time. Eventually I wanted to pursue a divorce that put our kids first, he wanted scorched earth. My AP is divorced and understands what the collateral damage would be to me and my kids. I wish that I had a clean break, but it wouldn't be, and I'm not willing to put my teens through the hell DH would cause.


So you are having an affair as a favor to your kids because you are scared of what your DH might do?

If you get caught, you will have given your DH everything he needs to go scorched earth. It is unlikely your affair would impact your property or custody settlement, but it would affect your reputation.
Anonymous
Post 07/05/2025 13:09     Subject: If you’re a single woman having an affair with a married man
Someone I considered a friend is having an affair with a married man, and this has made me lose all respect for her - they were hooking up until about a week and a half ago and his wife had a baby last weekend. I think she’s pathetic, he’s pathetic, and the situation overall is pathetic.

She’s never had a great time with relationships, and is frankly a difficult person to deal with in general. That she’s mid-forties, never been married (nor asked), no kids, no career - I think it all speaks for itself. I’m ending the friendship.
Anonymous
Post 07/05/2025 13:05     Subject: If you’re a single woman having an affair with a married man
Anonymous wrote:So many posts seem to assume these relationships are all the same. There's probably more variation.

I'm 45yo married man with kids. There has been no intimacy of any kind in my marriage for years. We generally get along, we're good co-parents, but deep down, both of us are very unhappy with our marriage and are staying together only for the kids right now. Meanwhile, my AP is divorced, same age as me, and also has kids. We met many years ago and became friends. Over time, the conversations became deeper and the friendship became more real. Eventually, romantic feelings developed, and after a long period dancing around the issue, we gave in to those feelings. She knows what's going on in my marriage because I've been talking to her about it for years. She knows I'm not b.s.-ing her just to get her into bed or stringing her along. I would never have considered doing this if I didn't feel like I'd exhausted all other options with my wife, and I think my AP has the same view. We like being together. Neither of us has any concrete expectation about where this will go. She's not looking for a permanent partner any more than I am, but we do genuinely care about each other and enjoy our time together.


Agree, not every case is black and white. I was faithful for 20 years to DH, but we had problems from the beginning that worsened over time. Eventually I wanted to pursue a divorce that put our kids first, he wanted scorched earth. My AP is divorced and understands what the collateral damage would be to me and my kids. I wish that I had a clean break, but it wouldn't be, and I'm not willing to put my teens through the hell DH would cause.
Anonymous
Post 07/05/2025 13:00     Subject: If you’re a single woman having an affair with a married man
Anonymous wrote:So many posts seem to assume these relationships are all the same. There's probably more variation.

I'm 45yo married man with kids. There has been no intimacy of any kind in my marriage for years. We generally get along, we're good co-parents, but deep down, both of us are very unhappy with our marriage and are staying together only for the kids right now. Meanwhile, my AP is divorced, same age as me, and also has kids. We met many years ago and became friends. Over time, the conversations became deeper and the friendship became more real. Eventually, romantic feelings developed, and after a long period dancing around the issue, we gave in to those feelings. She knows what's going on in my marriage because I've been talking to her about it for years. She knows I'm not b.s.-ing her just to get her into bed or stringing her along. I would never have considered doing this if I didn't feel like I'd exhausted all other options with my wife, and I think my AP has the same view. We like being together. Neither of us has any concrete expectation about where this will go. She's not looking for a permanent partner any more than I am, but we do genuinely care about each other and enjoy our time together.
The coward has entered the chat.
Anonymous
Post 07/05/2025 12:49     Subject: If you’re a single woman having an affair with a married man
So many posts seem to assume these relationships are all the same. There's probably more variation.

I'm 45yo married man with kids. There has been no intimacy of any kind in my marriage for years. We generally get along, we're good co-parents, but deep down, both of us are very unhappy with our marriage and are staying together only for the kids right now. Meanwhile, my AP is divorced, same age as me, and also has kids. We met many years ago and became friends. Over time, the conversations became deeper and the friendship became more real. Eventually, romantic feelings developed, and after a long period dancing around the issue, we gave in to those feelings. She knows what's going on in my marriage because I've been talking to her about it for years. She knows I'm not b.s.-ing her just to get her into bed or stringing her along. I would never have considered doing this if I didn't feel like I'd exhausted all other options with my wife, and I think my AP has the same view. We like being together. Neither of us has any concrete expectation about where this will go. She's not looking for a permanent partner any more than I am, but we do genuinely care about each other and enjoy our time together.
Anonymous
Post 07/05/2025 12:28     Subject: If you’re a single woman having an affair with a married man
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:AP here. He’s married I suspect he’ll stay that way. His kids and their wellbeing are very important to him. He even has a loving realtionship with his wife which is good everywhere except for attraction and sex. She rejects him for sex constantly and he’s not sure he can get erect for her anymore anyway without help from meds. I’m just out of a long term relationship and don’t want anything serious. We both get good, really good, sex and neither of us are interested in it going any further. So, yeah, I’m hanging out with friends on the 4th but I don’t currently feel like I need more.


Some women are incredible. This piece of sh**t here knowingly f**g a married man goes as far as saying yeah he cares about his kids and wife b**ch how about you go find another man who is not taken. A woman will destroy another woman's lofe and not be bothered by it 1 second.


No the AP is not married stop blaming them

The person who is married is the trash


And the person having sex with trash is …?


Trash-bin?
Anonymous
Post 07/05/2025 12:27     Subject: If you’re a single woman having an affair with a married man
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:AP here. He’s married I suspect he’ll stay that way. His kids and their wellbeing are very important to him. He even has a loving realtionship with his wife which is good everywhere except for attraction and sex. She rejects him for sex constantly and he’s not sure he can get erect for her anymore anyway without help from meds. I’m just out of a long term relationship and don’t want anything serious. We both get good, really good, sex and neither of us are interested in it going any further. So, yeah, I’m hanging out with friends on the 4th but I don’t currently feel like I need more.


Some women are incredible. This piece of sh**t here knowingly f**g a married man goes as far as saying yeah he cares about his kids and wife b**ch how about you go find another man who is not taken. A woman will destroy another woman's lofe and not be bothered by it 1 second.


No the AP is not married stop blaming them

The person who is married is the trash


And the person having sex with trash is …?
Anonymous
Post 07/05/2025 11:50     Subject: If you’re a single woman having an affair with a married man
Why don't we hear a lot from the men who are having affairs with married women?