Anonymous
Post 03/20/2025 19:37     Subject: Questions for people who've gone out to eat alone
Anonymous wrote:New job requires travel, so I'm going to be frequently eating in my hotel room, however, I'm not entirely opposed to eating out alone. For those of you who do it:

1. You sit at the bar, right? Usually best, or a small table. Considered rude to take up a 4 person table. Do you walk in and walk out if the bar has no seats and/or the bar only has one open seat, which means you have to squeeze in tightly between two groups? Muscle your way in. Be loud and boisterous and people will either slink away if they are shy, or they will talk to you and you make new friends. I think I'd be deeply uncomfortable eating with randoms that close to me on both sides. Make plenty of belching noises and fart some, that will make them move further away from you.

2. What do you do if the bar has no TV? That would be unusual in this day and age of cheap flatscreens. But at least I wouldn't be subjected to some stupid sports crap. I assume with or without TV, you just play on your phone most of the time? No, that's what a child would do, using a phone as a security blankie to look important and busy to hide their awkwardness. And if no TV, you basically play on your phone the entire time? Again no. Socialize with people, play the jukebox, buy some people drinks. Watch the beginning of "Schindler's List" If there's a TV, at least you can look up and let it occupy chunks of your time.

3. Do you tend to eat really quickly when alone? I always eat quickly. Paying for a hot meal, I eat it while it is hot. While you're eating, and in-between bites, do you look around or look straight ahead? I don't see any reason to pause, I think I'd just hoover up my food and quickly pay. You sure seem to be socially anxious. Chillax!

4. Sort of related to 3, do you give you credit card when you order to speed up cashing out and your exit? No, cash only. Tip in cash only also for reasons.


Answers in bold to keep them clear.
Anonymous
Post 03/20/2025 18:48     Subject: Re:Questions for people who've gone out to eat alone
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I prefer a table to the bar. I don't want the bartender to feel like he/she has to make small talk. I don't feel in a rush - just order, eat, pay at a normal pace. I often bring a book or do the crossword on my phone, but when I'm actively eating I just eat. I guess look around a little? Whatever feels natural. Once you do it once or twice you'll see it's no big deal.


[/b]If you’re a solo woman a chatty bartender is trying to bone you[b], if you’re a solo man the bartender is taking pity on you and forcing conversation. It’s all very awk.


Yes, the bartender cannot resist the middle aged mom eating alone.


Most bartenders will screw anything with a pulse.


True. Pulse optional, honestly.
Anonymous
Post 03/20/2025 18:46     Subject: Re:Questions for people who've gone out to eat alone
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I prefer a table to the bar. I don't want the bartender to feel like he/she has to make small talk. I don't feel in a rush - just order, eat, pay at a normal pace. I often bring a book or do the crossword on my phone, but when I'm actively eating I just eat. I guess look around a little? Whatever feels natural. Once you do it once or twice you'll see it's no big deal.


[/b]If you’re a solo woman a chatty bartender is trying to bone you[b], if you’re a solo man the bartender is taking pity on you and forcing conversation. It’s all very awk.


Yes, the bartender cannot resist the middle aged mom eating alone.


Most bartenders will screw anything with a pulse.
Anonymous
Post 03/20/2025 17:50     Subject: Re:Questions for people who've gone out to eat alone
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I prefer a table to the bar. I don't want the bartender to feel like he/she has to make small talk. I don't feel in a rush - just order, eat, pay at a normal pace. I often bring a book or do the crossword on my phone, but when I'm actively eating I just eat. I guess look around a little? Whatever feels natural. Once you do it once or twice you'll see it's no big deal.


[/b]If you’re a solo woman a chatty bartender is trying to bone you[b], if you’re a solo man the bartender is taking pity on you and forcing conversation. It’s all very awk.


Yes, the bartender cannot resist the middle aged mom eating alone.
Anonymous
Post 03/20/2025 17:41     Subject: Questions for people who've gone out to eat alone
Anonymous wrote:Why do you care so much about how others perceive you, OP? No one cares. No, you don't have to sit at the bar. Eating by yourself is fine. People travel for business all the time.


+1
No one is looking at you.
No one cares what you do.
You are not the center of the universe.
Act like an adult.
Anonymous
Post 03/20/2025 16:54     Subject: Questions for people who've gone out to eat alone
Anonymous wrote:I sit at a table. It might feel strange the just few times but eventually you won’t think about it.

When I was a young woman, I learned quickly not to sit at the bar alone. Some men seem to think this means you are a prostitute or looking for a sugar daddy.


As a woman, this is why I select a table. Because while some people are great and it’s lovely to chat…. Enough men act skeevy and can turn a pleasant evening I to an unappetizing and rushed meal.
Anonymous
Post 03/20/2025 16:50     Subject: Questions for people who've gone out to eat alone
Anonymous wrote:^People watching. Enjoying an atmosphere. Enjoying a view. Enjoying the weather. Lots of reasons.

And regarding the phone thing. Your bar neighbor does not care what you're looking at on your phone.


Woman here.
I prefer a table to the bar.
I read or do some work (non-computer).
I eat on my way back to the hotel.
Good luck.
Anonymous
Post 03/20/2025 16:45     Subject: Questions for people who've gone out to eat alone
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I don't mind eating alone usually. I ask for a table if there is one available. I enjoy the food, look at my phone, and tip nicely.

The only issue if it is a weird place where no else is alone and not a big city and the staff act like you are a loser, but that has only happened a couple times.


Big city or not, the staff is judging you.


NP: Luckily I don't really care what people think of me, especially if I'm never going to see them again!


Same. It would be a sad way to live if I cared about that.


It’s the server’s disposition. You can tell they feel sorry for you. They’re also wondering why didn’t just order to-go.
Anonymous
Post 03/20/2025 16:22     Subject: Questions for people who've gone out to eat alone
Got to page 2 then quit.

I might sit at the bar or a two top or a regular table depending how busy they are or if I want to wait. Sometimes I even make a reservation for one person.

I might watch bar TV. I might read a book.
I like to sit and look at scenery if it's that kind of location. Sit outside, watch the waves. But sometimes I just sit, enjoy my own company.

I do not hoover my food, rush. I order well. Tip well.
I am not apologetic.

Been eating alone on business trips since the 1970s ffs.

I
Anonymous
Post 03/20/2025 16:00     Subject: Questions for people who've gone out to eat alone
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I don't mind eating alone usually. I ask for a table if there is one available. I enjoy the food, look at my phone, and tip nicely.

The only issue if it is a weird place where no else is alone and not a big city and the staff act like you are a loser, but that has only happened a couple times.


Big city or not, the staff is judging you.


NP: Luckily I don't really care what people think of me, especially if I'm never going to see them again!


Same. It would be a sad way to live if I cared about that.
Anonymous
Post 03/20/2025 15:59     Subject: Re:Questions for people who've gone out to eat alone
Anonymous wrote:I prefer a table to the bar. I don't want the bartender to feel like he/she has to make small talk. I don't feel in a rush - just order, eat, pay at a normal pace. I often bring a book or do the crossword on my phone, but when I'm actively eating I just eat. I guess look around a little? Whatever feels natural. Once you do it once or twice you'll see it's no big deal.


If you’re a solo woman a chatty bartender is trying to bone you, if you’re a solo man the bartender is taking pity on you and forcing conversation. It’s all very awk.
Anonymous
Post 03/20/2025 15:59     Subject: Questions for people who've gone out to eat alone
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I don't mind eating alone usually. I ask for a table if there is one available. I enjoy the food, look at my phone, and tip nicely.

The only issue if it is a weird place where no else is alone and not a big city and the staff act like you are a loser, but that has only happened a couple times.


Big city or not, the staff is judging you.


NP: Luckily I don't really care what people think of me, especially if I'm never going to see them again!
Anonymous
Post 03/20/2025 15:57     Subject: Questions for people who've gone out to eat alone
Anonymous wrote:I don't mind eating alone usually. I ask for a table if there is one available. I enjoy the food, look at my phone, and tip nicely.

The only issue if it is a weird place where no else is alone and not a big city and the staff act like you are a loser, but that has only happened a couple times.



Big city or not, the staff is judging you.
Anonymous
Post 03/20/2025 14:44     Subject: Questions for people who've gone out to eat alone
Just when you think DCUM can’t get any weirder, another steps up to the plate, and sayhold my beer.
Anonymous
Post 03/20/2025 14:43     Subject: Questions for people who've gone out to eat alone
Anonymous wrote:Americans are so uptight about everything. Does anyone in this country simply know how to enjoy themselves without getting blind drunk or stoned? Sad.


Stop that. Everyone responding to OP is telling she that she's being neurotic, so why are you making a sweeping generalization about Americans? Cut that out.