Wow. My first thought was 5%, but I’m very happily married.

Would guess that this follows a fairly normal bell curve distribution with 20 pct being intensely faithful and 20 pct being in longer term or multiple affairs (which I’m defining as physical with intercourse).

In between I would guess from my own experience that most people have strayed a little emotionally and/or had physical interactions that fall short of sex (e.g. making out at a bar) depending on what arouses them. I’m pretty average in every way but often find school moms as well as total randoms flirting with me or giving me an inviting look which cues me to chat them up. I have zero interest in leaving my spouse so the furthest I’ve taken anything is just a few one on one playdates and some flirtatious text banter with a bored mom, but am sure those looking to go further can do so easily.

Agree with those who have said that monogamy is not human nature, particularly in 40s and 50s when you haven’t dated and slept around in some time. We reign in our instincts to salvage a healthy family rearing and financial structure. On the flip side also think alternative arrangements like polyamory are a bit weird; if you’re going to cheat just blow it up completely or operate completely under the radar screen.

Only miserable people post online. I think it's a small percentage of people who cheat.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:50-70% is crazy high.
I don’t know how you cheat in this day and age and keep it a secret.
I would guess 20%.

My ex had to know I was cheating but was willfully blind. He was so desperate to avoid doing what it would have taken to make me happy that he ignored it right up until I left.

Why didn’t you leave him sooner if you were going to cheat and leave anyway?

Didn’t know when the cheating started that our differences were irreconcilable. The fact he would just ignore all problems including cheating clinched it for me.

amazing... so you are the one who f'ed around and it was HIS fault that made you do it? no shame at all?

20% although there are more who at least give it serious thought.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:50-70% is crazy high.
I don’t know how you cheat in this day and age and keep it a secret.
I would guess 20%.

My ex had to know I was cheating but was willfully blind. He was so desperate to avoid doing what it would have taken to make me happy that he ignored it right up until I left.

Why didn’t you leave him sooner if you were going to cheat and leave anyway?

Didn’t know when the cheating started that our differences were irreconcilable. The fact he would just ignore all problems including cheating clinched it for me.

So it’s your husband’s fault that you cheated?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow. I would have said 5-10%. I’ve only known of one person in my adult life who cheated on a long term partner.

I knew of none. Then I got into my 50s and I have heard of sooooooo many. Lots of divorces happening now because either the wife or husband cheated and those are just the ones that speak of it.

Same. I used to think cheating only existing in the movies. I’m shocked at how many people we know have been unfaithful. I’m beginning to wonder if monogamy isn’t meant for humans.

Anonymous wrote: This morning he complained that we haven’t had sex in a year and I said “then what was it that we were doing at 11 last night”.

I assume he meant “we haven’t had sex at all this year”?

It depends on how you classify cheating. If we are including emotional affairs, I would say it's upward of 60-70%. Physical affairs 50%.

Anonymous wrote:Within our circle of friends I’m clueless if anyone has been unfaithful. Most have been married a long time and none are on a second marriage. I use to travel a lot on business and I was hit on plenty of times but I was never tempted. But, it was pretty clear that it’s not a small percent who are unfaithful. Thankfully, I have a great husband who has never failed to satisfy me sexually. This morning he complained that we haven’t had sex in a year and I said “then what was it that we were doing at 11 last night”.

?

Within our circle of friends I’m clueless if anyone has been unfaithful. Most have been married a long time and none are on a second marriage. I use to travel a lot on business and I was hit on plenty of times but I was never tempted. But, it was pretty clear that it’s not a small percent who are unfaithful. Thankfully, I have a great husband who has never failed to satisfy me sexually. This morning he complained that we haven’t had sex in a year and I said “then what was it that we were doing at 11 last night”.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:50-70% is crazy high.
I don’t know how you cheat in this day and age and keep it a secret.
I would guess 20%.

My ex had to know I was cheating but was willfully blind. He was so desperate to avoid doing what it would have taken to make me happy that he ignored it right up until I left.

Why didn’t you leave him sooner if you were going to cheat and leave anyway?

Didn’t know when the cheating started that our differences were irreconcilable. The fact he would just ignore all problems including cheating clinched it for me.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:50-70% is crazy high.
I don’t know how you cheat in this day and age and keep it a secret.
I would guess 20%.

My ex had to know I was cheating but was willfully blind. He was so desperate to avoid doing what it would have taken to make me happy that he ignored it right up until I left.

Why didn’t you leave him sooner if you were going to cheat and leave anyway?

Anonymous wrote:50-70% is crazy high.
I don’t know how you cheat in this day and age and keep it a secret.
I would guess 20%.

My ex had to know I was cheating but was willfully blind. He was so desperate to avoid doing what it would have taken to make me happy that he ignored it right up until I left.

Over 50%