My family is asian-american and we don't wear shoes in the house but we are not super anal about it. If we are home and staying home then we don't wear shoes. I go in and out from the deck with or without shoes. I don't want people walking around in the house with nasty contractor boots or even in their socks. They have to wear booties or not come in the house at all. I wouldn't expect private school parents to be wearing nasty shoes so I probably wouldn't make anybody remove their shoes.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't care about shoes in the house one way or the other. If you have a party put a note on the invite so I know to wear socks because I do feel weird about walking around other people's homes barefoot.

This. Lots of women will wear outfits without socks and I'd feel very strange walking around in an acquaintance's home barefoot... even though I wouldn't mind or be offended by the request to remove my shoes.

I don't have an issue with being asked to take off my shoes, but do not like walking barefoot in another's home. I keep a pair of footie socks in my bag. Shoes off socks on and everyone is happy!

Anonymous wrote:I don't care about shoes in the house one way or the other. If you have a party put a note on the invite so I know to wear socks because I do feel weird about walking around other people's homes barefoot.

This. Lots of women will wear outfits without socks and I'd feel very strange walking around in an acquaintance's home barefoot... even though I wouldn't mind or be offended by the request to remove my shoes.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This has been the norm for me but I’m Muslim American. We have a large rug in the living room and the upstairs and stairs are carpeted. I don’t want to shampoo my rugs after a party. We also have one child who is crawling. Be respectful of other peoples house rules.

You also need to learn how to be a gracious host by not treating them like they will track cow manure into your house. Frankly, I find the idea of people walking barefoot with smelly , oily or foot powdered feet far more objectionable than people keeping their shoes on.

That’s you. People can track in all sorts of stuff with shoes. You think the average person has dog sh** stuck to their feet? I think not.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This has been the norm for me but I’m Muslim American. We have a large rug in the living room and the upstairs and stairs are carpeted. I don’t want to shampoo my rugs after a party. We also have one child who is crawling. Be respectful of other peoples house rules.

You also need to learn how to be a gracious host by not treating them like they will track cow manure into your house. Frankly, I find the idea of people walking barefoot with smelly , oily or foot powdered feet far more objectionable than people keeping their shoes on.

My house, my rules.

Anonymous wrote:I’m Indian and grew up in a non-shoes house. My parents never asked anyone to take off their shoes. I don’t either - and when people ask me, I say do what is comfortable. They (And I) just knew we’d being doing a lot of mopping and vacuuming the next morning with certain guests. The good thing is that guests who don’t get the clue and keep their shoes on are the type of guest to wonder out of the common areas (which makes cleaning easier).

I live in a community with a bunch of Indians and they always ask for no shoes. It’s fine with me. Your parents weren’t the norm.

Anonymous wrote:This has been the norm for me but I’m Muslim American. We have a large rug in the living room and the upstairs and stairs are carpeted. I don’t want to shampoo my rugs after a party. We also have one child who is crawling. Be respectful of other peoples house rules.

You also need to learn how to be a gracious host by not treating them like they will track cow manure into your house. Frankly, I find the idea of people walking barefoot with smelly , oily or foot powdered feet far more objectionable than people keeping their shoes on.

Just put a tent in the yard for people that need shoes.

I don't care about shoes in the house one way or the other. If you have a party put a note on the invite so I know to wear socks because I do feel weird about walking around other people's homes barefoot.

No, but I’d provide slippers or flip flops or shoe covers. State on the invitation no shoes.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think we’re all missing the much more important point that a school is asking all of the families to host a large gathering at home??? That’s insane to me! I assume it’s fake, right?

All our class parties at someone’s home. They were by grade. Smaller schools though.

A family volunteering to host a one off party is really different than a series of dinners where families are expected to take turns hosting.

There is nothing in OP that says it’s a series of dinners. It’s grade wide parent party. She’s under no pressure to volunteer if she’s this rigid. But it would be weird to host 40-60 people she may or may not know and force all to take off their shoes in a country where it’s not considered the norm.

We are a no shoe house because I like to be barefoot but have a sensory thing about dust/dirt/grit on my feet. (I have a lot of trouble at the beach.) I ask kid guest to take their shoes off, but never adults. If they ask if they should, I tell them it’s up to them. People usually do, but I don’t mind if they don’t, I just sweep later.

we are also a no shoe house but i dont make people do this. it sucks for them and sometimes people have not had a pedicure or they might have a foot secret or something. i think if you want to have people over en masse then just deal. we ask close friends to take off shoes.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think we’re all missing the much more important point that a school is asking all of the families to host a large gathering at home??? That’s insane to me! I assume it’s fake, right?

All our class parties at someone’s home. They were by grade. Smaller schools though.

A family volunteering to host a one off party is really different than a series of dinners where families are expected to take turns hosting.

Anonymous wrote:Anyone offended by this request isn’t someone I would want to be friends with. Besides, most people know this is the norm for Asian families.

I am an uncouth Midwesterner who hosts a lot, and find that 90% of people ask whether they should take their shoes off as they come in.

np So you have such a low bar for friendship. A murderer who takes off his shoes in your house is ok but, a normal person who has foot problems and rescues cats is an enemy for life?