Anonymous
05/03/2024 09:59
Subject: Parents/in-laws paying estate tax to avoid giving while alive
Holy crap. My in laws just give us debt. Helped pay their mortgage, house still got foreclosed on. Now paying for fun stuff like assisted living that they cannot afford. So just enjoy that you’re not doing that. We can’t afford them!
Anonymous
05/03/2024 09:55
Subject: Parents/in-laws paying estate tax to avoid giving while alive
Anonymous wrote:Here's how it goes in my family:
Mom: "I've decided that we will pay the kids' tuition this year. We can see that you are struggling financially." (She says this because I work, unlike she did.)
Me: "No, no, that's really not necessary. We are managing fine."
A week later...Mom: "Your husband didn't even mention the gift we were thinking of giving you. I don't feel like he appreciates how generous we are."
Me: "I told you we didn't need the money. Why would he thank you for a gift we haven't even received? Please don't worry about us so much."
Mom: "It just kills me to see you working so hard. He should be happy we are trying to help so that you could take a break from working."
Me: "I don't really want to take a break from working."
Mom: "We are offering to help you and I just don't feel like you're grateful."
Whereas if she REALLY wanted us to have the money, she'd just surprise us with the check at Christmas. But she wants the buildup and us on our knees telling her how much we depend on her. Meanwhile my father doesn't even know she's offering this money!
Just give your mom the contact info for the bursar's office and tell her to call them to arrange payment. Let her pay for it and actually follow through on her own accord, if she's serious. She's waiting on you to help move this along. Don't look a gift horse in the mouth.
Anonymous
05/02/2024 20:28
Subject: Parents/in-laws paying estate tax to avoid giving while alive
Anonymous wrote:Here's how it goes in my family:
Mom: "I've decided that we will pay the kids' tuition this year. We can see that you are struggling financially." (She says this because I work, unlike she did.)
Me: "No, no, that's really not necessary. We are managing fine."
A week later...Mom: "Your husband didn't even mention the gift we were thinking of giving you. I don't feel like he appreciates how generous we are."
Me: "I told you we didn't need the money. Why would he thank you for a gift we haven't even received? Please don't worry about us so much."
Mom: "It just kills me to see you working so hard. He should be happy we are trying to help so that you could take a break from working."
Me: "I don't really want to take a break from working."
Mom: "We are offering to help you and I just don't feel like you're grateful."
Whereas if she REALLY wanted us to have the money, she'd just surprise us with the check at Christmas. But she wants the buildup and us on our knees telling her how much we depend on her. Meanwhile my father doesn't even know she's offering this money!
This sounds like an SNL skit. I think our moms may be related.
Anonymous
05/02/2024 20:22
Subject: Parents/in-laws paying estate tax to avoid giving while alive
Here's how it goes in my family:
Mom: "I've decided that we will pay the kids' tuition this year. We can see that you are struggling financially." (She says this because I work, unlike she did.)
Me: "No, no, that's really not necessary. We are managing fine."
A week later...Mom: "Your husband didn't even mention the gift we were thinking of giving you. I don't feel like he appreciates how generous we are."
Me: "I told you we didn't need the money. Why would he thank you for a gift we haven't even received? Please don't worry about us so much."
Mom: "It just kills me to see you working so hard. He should be happy we are trying to help so that you could take a break from working."
Me: "I don't really want to take a break from working."
Mom: "We are offering to help you and I just don't feel like you're grateful."
Whereas if she REALLY wanted us to have the money, she'd just surprise us with the check at Christmas. But she wants the buildup and us on our knees telling her how much we depend on her. Meanwhile my father doesn't even know she's offering this money!
Mom: "I've decided that we will pay the kids' tuition this year. We can see that you are struggling financially." (She says this because I work, unlike she did.)
Me: "No, no, that's really not necessary. We are managing fine."
A week later...Mom: "Your husband didn't even mention the gift we were thinking of giving you. I don't feel like he appreciates how generous we are."
Me: "I told you we didn't need the money. Why would he thank you for a gift we haven't even received? Please don't worry about us so much."
Mom: "It just kills me to see you working so hard. He should be happy we are trying to help so that you could take a break from working."
Me: "I don't really want to take a break from working."
Mom: "We are offering to help you and I just don't feel like you're grateful."
Whereas if she REALLY wanted us to have the money, she'd just surprise us with the check at Christmas. But she wants the buildup and us on our knees telling her how much we depend on her. Meanwhile my father doesn't even know she's offering this money!
Anonymous
05/02/2024 19:41
Subject: Parents/in-laws paying estate tax to avoid giving while alive
Sometimes, successful old people have an identity crisis and wonder who or what really needs them or cares that they still exist anymore. When a grown child needs their money, the senior still has a pull on others. At a minimum, visits to the grandparents get made to generate favor. And, who knows, ma and pa might surprise everyone with a nice gift. Likewise, if the grandparents are paying for kids private education. There is a sense that they still matter and make a difference. However, when kids are doing great and don’t need the grandparents or their money, there can be a sense that the grandparents don’t really have a role to play anymore. Of course, the ideal role is that their children and grandchildren just enjoy their company and want them around, but that’s a small minority of situations. Basically, OPs situation is a power play by the grandparents, as they’re miffed that they’re not really needed or wanted, yet they know that the kids might get their money anyway someday.
Anonymous
05/02/2024 17:30
Subject: Parents/in-laws paying estate tax to avoid giving while alive
I hope they spend it all frivolously on themselves before they die.
Anonymous
05/02/2024 17:11
Subject: Parents/in-laws paying estate tax to avoid giving while alive
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Wouldn't you feel strange and guilty taking these huge sums of money from them while they're still alive? Wouldn't it create a strained and weird dynamic? Wouldn't you feel inadequate?
LOL of course not....that's why you picked this guy. To cash in asap.
Everyone knows you have to wait until your 60s for the older generation to finally croak and then you can spend the money on cruises and restaurants. Not a moment before!
Are you new here? Tons of posters accept private school tuition, college tuition, down payments, lavish vacations, plus cash gifts up to the annual limit per person and don’t feel an ounce of guilt.
I know and it's a source of amusement to me...I am constantly refusing money from my mother because it will create a power struggle where she feels we owe her deference. She wants to be Lady Catherine Debourg granting favors. I'm not playing that game and my husband definitely isn't.
My grandparents died in their 90s and my parents, aunts and uncles have been on a spending spree ever since. Obviously a young family could use that money more but it's not worth the pressure.
Anonymous
05/02/2024 00:02
Subject: Parents/in-laws paying estate tax to avoid giving while alive
Anonymous wrote:Wouldn't you feel strange and guilty taking these huge sums of money from them while they're still alive? Wouldn't it create a strained and weird dynamic? Wouldn't you feel inadequate?
LOL of course not....that's why you picked this guy. To cash in asap.
Everyone knows you have to wait until your 60s for the older generation to finally croak and then you can spend the money on cruises and restaurants. Not a moment before!
Are you new here? Tons of posters accept private school tuition, college tuition, down payments, lavish vacations, plus cash gifts up to the annual limit per person and don’t feel an ounce of guilt.
Anonymous
05/01/2024 22:07
Subject: Parents/in-laws paying estate tax to avoid giving while alive
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:So incredibly weird that you would be giving this a thought. I would absolutely not be your friend, as you seem like a horrible greedy person.
X100000. So gross.
Also, of this is the sixth grifter thread by OP today, I'm going to throw up.
OP here. I identified myself in my posts, so many of these are not me. Your nausea notwithstanding.
Anonymous
05/01/2024 21:00
Subject: Parents/in-laws paying estate tax to avoid giving while alive
Anonymous wrote:Wouldn't you feel strange and guilty taking these huge sums of money from them while they're still alive? Wouldn't it create a strained and weird dynamic? Wouldn't you feel inadequate?
LOL of course not....that's why you picked this guy. To cash in asap.
Everyone knows you have to wait until your 60s for the older generation to finally croak and then you can spend the money on cruises and restaurants. Not a moment before!
So tacky
Anonymous
05/01/2024 20:59
Subject: Parents/in-laws paying estate tax to avoid giving while alive
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I thought we wanted the rich to pay their fair share. What do you want OP? For the rich to not pay up? Are you that greedy?
The rich pay plenty. Leaving that aside, estate taxes are absurd because it’s money that was already taxed. People should be able to do what they want with it, tax free.
+1000
Someone called it a "transfer tax" and all money is taxed when it's transferred. I think that's ridiculous. We earned the money and paid massive taxes on it, why should it be taxed justbecause we give it to our kids or grandkids.
Smart people do find legal ways with trusts and gifting while still alive to avoid estate taxes.
Sick of this dumb argument. When you die, you’re not paying taxes on it. You’re dead. Your children are paying taxes on their new income, as they should.
Then why are gifts taxed over 17k annually?
They are NOT taxed until you die as part of your estate. You just have to record any gifts over the $18K per person/from person limit each year and it is ultimately deducted from your estate
Also, IMO I should be able to gift my kids and grandkids as much as I want. They are family. But there are ways around it.
You forgot about the lifetime exemption.
Anonymous
05/01/2024 20:54
Subject: Parents/in-laws paying estate tax to avoid giving while alive
Wouldn't you feel strange and guilty taking these huge sums of money from them while they're still alive? Wouldn't it create a strained and weird dynamic? Wouldn't you feel inadequate?
LOL of course not....that's why you picked this guy. To cash in asap.
Everyone knows you have to wait until your 60s for the older generation to finally croak and then you can spend the money on cruises and restaurants. Not a moment before!
LOL of course not....that's why you picked this guy. To cash in asap.
Everyone knows you have to wait until your 60s for the older generation to finally croak and then you can spend the money on cruises and restaurants. Not a moment before!
Anonymous
05/01/2024 20:50
Subject: Parents/in-laws paying estate tax to avoid giving while alive
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I thought we wanted the rich to pay their fair share. What do you want OP? For the rich to not pay up? Are you that greedy?
The rich pay plenty. Leaving that aside, estate taxes are absurd because it’s money that was already taxed. People should be able to do what they want with it, tax free.
+1000
Someone called it a "transfer tax" and all money is taxed when it's transferred. I think that's ridiculous. We earned the money and paid massive taxes on it, why should it be taxed justbecause we give it to our kids or grandkids.
Smart people do find legal ways with trusts and gifting while still alive to avoid estate taxes.
Because in a democracy, the elected representatives get to make the rules and if you don’t like them you have to get other people elected to changes them.
You are free to give it to tax exempt organizations, spend it, or burn it. But if you give it to individuals, including family, it’s taxable.
So you give it to them in a trust. But in reality, the estate tax might sunset in 2025 but will eventually go back to the $13M+ it's at currently (or higher).
Anonymous
05/01/2024 20:48
Subject: Parents/in-laws paying estate tax to avoid giving while alive
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I thought we wanted the rich to pay their fair share. What do you want OP? For the rich to not pay up? Are you that greedy?
The rich pay plenty. Leaving that aside, estate taxes are absurd because it’s money that was already taxed. People should be able to do what they want with it, tax free.
+1000
Someone called it a "transfer tax" and all money is taxed when it's transferred. I think that's ridiculous. We earned the money and paid massive taxes on it, why should it be taxed justbecause we give it to our kids or grandkids.
Smart people do find legal ways with trusts and gifting while still alive to avoid estate taxes.
Sick of this dumb argument. When you die, you’re not paying taxes on it. You’re dead. Your children are paying taxes on their new income, as they should.
Then why are gifts taxed over 17k annually?
They are not taxed annually,. Anything gifted over $18K/year goes against your estate tax exemption. You file it with the IRS with your taxes and then when you die, your allowed estate tax exemption is reduced by this amount.
Anonymous
05/01/2024 18:51
Subject: Parents/in-laws paying estate tax to avoid giving while alive
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:So incredibly weird that you would be giving this a thought. I would absolutely not be your friend, as you seem like a horrible greedy person.
X100000. So gross.
Also, of this is the sixth grifter thread by OP today, I'm going to throw up.