Parents need to bar their boys from screens, laziness, and junk food.

Boys should be working out, working hard, playing outside, and studying. It’s our own fault that so many boys suck. Say no to screens and don’t let your boy be a loser.

Anonymous wrote:With so many girls now lesbians, I would think the dating pool would be huge for straight girls in high school and college.

It's still in the low single digits.
https://news.gallup.com/poll/389792/lgbt-identification-ticks-up.aspx

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because my car died today, I met a very well-spoken and personable young AAA truck driver today. He was college aged and quite intelligent. I'm not sure what drove his decision, but his career choices (and those of others like him) are not helping the college dating scene for our daughters!

It's also impacting the experience of girls who are applying to college. Because there are so many more girls than boys applying to schools, and admissions folks try to "balance" gender by accepting a higher percentage of male applicants, admissions are much, much more competitive for girls at many popular schools such as Brown, Vassar etc.
I guess if you want to meet boys, go to trade school!

The issue is not lifting up women.

The issue is that over the past decade, there has been a coordinated effort to push down males and to discourage them from achieving. Most of the qualities that create good men, strong husbands, positive fathers and prociders have been branded as evil in the name of "toxic masculinity"

I have all sons. They are great kids who I have been raising to be good husbands, fathers and providers. They have had multiple teachers over the years openly disparage men, including regularly slamming "privileged white men" Is is any wonder that many of the young men, growing up in an environment where they and things that make quality adult men are openly disparaged in their schools and media, are now not seeking to achieve?

I met a nice young man who was working in a trade. Are you saying he should have chosen college?

Yes. If he wants to meet the standards of DCUM women, he is undateable unless he has a college degree.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Telling the truth that one group has systemic privilege built into a historical system isn't disparaging--it's just telling the truth about history and power. It's not something to personalize, rather to see how it impacts life for everyone. I'm a parent of white sons too and it's been nothing but good for them to think this through and see the world more clearly. It hasn't diminished their ambition or drive, they want to make the world a better place and they still want to achieve their personal, educational and career goals.

If it hasn't diminished their drive, why are we seeing 60%+ females at college? Men aren't being encourage or driven to apply to college.

Look if you frame this as a problem for men you will get no support. The posters do not care. The problem as the posters see it - the lack of men in college will mean some women will not be happy because they will not men trying to court them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because my car died today, I met a very well-spoken and personable young AAA truck driver today. He was college aged and quite intelligent. I'm not sure what drove his decision, but his career choices (and those of others like him) are not helping the college dating scene for our daughters!

It's also impacting the experience of girls who are applying to college. Because there are so many more girls than boys applying to schools, and admissions folks try to "balance" gender by accepting a higher percentage of male applicants, admissions are much, much more competitive for girls at many popular schools such as Brown, Vassar etc.
I guess if you want to meet boys, go to trade school!

The issue is not lifting up women.

The issue is that over the past decade, there has been a coordinated effort to push down males and to discourage them from achieving. Most of the qualities that create good men, strong husbands, positive fathers and prociders have been branded as evil in the name of "toxic masculinity"

I have all sons. They are great kids who I have been raising to be good husbands, fathers and providers. They have had multiple teachers over the years openly disparage men, including regularly slamming "privileged white men" Is is any wonder that many of the young men, growing up in an environment where they and things that make quality adult men are openly disparaged in their schools and media, are now not seeking to achieve?

I met a nice young man who was working in a trade. Are you saying he should have chosen college?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Telling the truth that one group has systemic privilege built into a historical system isn't disparaging--it's just telling the truth about history and power. It's not something to personalize, rather to see how it impacts life for everyone. I'm a parent of white sons too and it's been nothing but good for them to think this through and see the world more clearly. It hasn't diminished their ambition or drive, they want to make the world a better place and they still want to achieve their personal, educational and career goals.

If it hasn't diminished their drive, why are we seeing 60%+ females at college? Men aren't being encourage or driven to apply to college.

And the ones who do go to college--especially coveted college or major have worse arrogance problems than our nothers generation--why? because if they are straight they have a surplus of choices--its all about supply and demand, when the supply is low and demand high the price goes up...

Anonymous wrote:
Telling the truth that one group has systemic privilege built into a historical system isn't disparaging--it's just telling the truth about history and power. It's not something to personalize, rather to see how it impacts life for everyone. I'm a parent of white sons too and it's been nothing but good for them to think this through and see the world more clearly. It hasn't diminished their ambition or drive, they want to make the world a better place and they still want to achieve their personal, educational and career goals.

If it hasn't diminished their drive, why are we seeing 60%+ females at college? Men aren't being encourage or driven to apply to college.

Boys tend to on average do a better than girls on the math section of the SAT, but they have slightly lower grades on average. So in a way, test optional hurts boys.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because my car died today, I met a very well-spoken and personable young AAA truck driver today. He was college aged and quite intelligent. I'm not sure what drove his decision, but his career choices (and those of others like him) are not helping the college dating scene for our daughters!

It's also impacting the experience of girls who are applying to college. Because there are so many more girls than boys applying to schools, and admissions folks try to "balance" gender by accepting a higher percentage of male applicants, admissions are much, much more competitive for girls at many popular schools such as Brown, Vassar etc.
I guess if you want to meet boys, go to trade school!

The issue is not lifting up women.

The issue is that over the past decade, there has been a coordinated effort to push down males and to discourage them from achieving. Most of the qualities that create good men, strong husbands, positive fathers and prociders have been branded as evil in the name of "toxic masculinity"

I have all sons. They are great kids who I have been raising to be good husbands, fathers and providers. They have had multiple teachers over the years openly disparage men, including regularly slamming "privileged white men" Is is any wonder that many of the young men, growing up in an environment where they and things that make quality adult men are openly disparaged in their schools and media, are now not seeking to achieve?

I’m sure those teachers graded your boys fairly just like they graded the girls…

Maybe, or maybe not.

But you don't continuously disparage one particular group of people (in this case, young men) in a school setting during the formative teen years, and then act surprised that you created a negative result. (Fewer boys applying to college)

There has to be a swing back to the center. The college stats prove this.

For every teacher disparaging boys, there is another favoring them. For almost all of humanity, girls were at a massive disadvantage in education. Now that the field is level, it turns out they are better students. Of course the response is to re-tilt everything to favor boys again.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because my car died today, I met a very well-spoken and personable young AAA truck driver today. He was college aged and quite intelligent. I'm not sure what drove his decision, but his career choices (and those of others like him) are not helping the college dating scene for our daughters!

I know a number of men in the trades. Good jobs, good pay, and usually pretty low stress too. I envy that when their workday ends, it's really over for the day.

But based on reading other DCUM threads, these men are not worthy of dating because they do not meet the standards of many women, lacking a college degree and all.

+1

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because my car died today, I met a very well-spoken and personable young AAA truck driver today. He was college aged and quite intelligent. I'm not sure what drove his decision, but his career choices (and those of others like him) are not helping the college dating scene for our daughters!

It's also impacting the experience of girls who are applying to college. Because there are so many more girls than boys applying to schools, and admissions folks try to "balance" gender by accepting a higher percentage of male applicants, admissions are much, much more competitive for girls at many popular schools such as Brown, Vassar etc.
I guess if you want to meet boys, go to trade school!

The issue is not lifting up women.

The issue is that over the past decade, there has been a coordinated effort to push down males and to discourage them from achieving. Most of the qualities that create good men, strong husbands, positive fathers and prociders have been branded as evil in the name of "toxic masculinity"

I have all sons. They are great kids who I have been raising to be good husbands, fathers and providers. They have had multiple teachers over the years openly disparage men, including regularly slamming "privileged white men" Is is any wonder that many of the young men, growing up in an environment where they and things that make quality adult men are openly disparaged in their schools and media, are now not seeking to achieve?

I’m sure those teachers graded your boys fairly just like they graded the girls…

Maybe, or maybe not.

But you don't continuously disparage one particular group of people (in this case, young men) in a school setting during the formative teen years, and then act surprised that you created a negative result. (Fewer boys applying to college)

There has to be a swing back to the center. The college stats prove this.

Telling the truth that one group has systemic privilege built into a historical system isn't disparaging--it's just telling the truth about history and power. It's not something to personalize, rather to see how it impacts life for everyone. I'm a parent of white sons too and it's been nothing but good for them to think this through and see the world more clearly. It hasn't diminished their ambition or drive, they want to make the world a better place and they still want to achieve their personal, educational and career goals. I think you're just making up excuses.
College stats don't "prove" some narrative you made up in your head about why. If I were making up stories about explaining why fewer men are applying to college (or lasting in college) I would more likely settle in on video games--they are designed by men to be addictive to other men and to have them express their ambition, drive, and power in an on-line world. Throw in easy access to p*rn and all the needs that they use to seek ambition in the real world are met without leaving their couch.

In reality, there's been an steady upward increase of men obtaining a college diploma: in 1950 7.3% of men got a college diploma, 1960 over 10%, 1970 14.1%, 1980, 20.9%, 1990 24.4%, 2000 27.8%, 2010 30.3%, 2020, 36.7%. It's just that women experienced a greater rate of increase so that's causing an imbalance. So if you're looking for explanatory options--you need to explain why women are more motivated to go to college.

Regarding the dating scene, how much of this is influenced by unrealistic stereotypes of social media.

Several moms posted in this thread that their daughters looked around on campjs tours, saw lots of guys, and declared they would never date any of them.

This is 100% based on superficial appearances. These guys might be funny, smart, ambitious, hard working, compassionate guys, but are declared undateable based off appearances alone. Is it because they don't look like the kind of guy the girl would want to post photos with on social media? Everything is so superficial now. I imagine that dating is even more so then it was before your entire life was expected to be instagrammable.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because my car died today, I met a very well-spoken and personable young AAA truck driver today. He was college aged and quite intelligent. I'm not sure what drove his decision, but his career choices (and those of others like him) are not helping the college dating scene for our daughters!

It's also impacting the experience of girls who are applying to college. Because there are so many more girls than boys applying to schools, and admissions folks try to "balance" gender by accepting a higher percentage of male applicants, admissions are much, much more competitive for girls at many popular schools such as Brown, Vassar etc.
I guess if you want to meet boys, go to trade school!

The issue is not lifting up women.

The issue is that over the past decade, there has been a coordinated effort to push down males and to discourage them from achieving. Most of the qualities that create good men, strong husbands, positive fathers and prociders have been branded as evil in the name of "toxic masculinity"

I have all sons. They are great kids who I have been raising to be good husbands, fathers and providers. They have had multiple teachers over the years openly disparage men, including regularly slamming "privileged white men" Is is any wonder that many of the young men, growing up in an environment where they and things that make quality adult men are openly disparaged in their schools and media, are now not seeking to achieve?

I’m sure those teachers graded your boys fairly just like they graded the girls…

Maybe, or maybe not.

But you don't continuously disparage one particular group of people (in this case, young men) in a school setting during the formative teen years, and then act surprised that you created a negative result. (Fewer boys applying to college)

There has to be a swing back to the center. The college stats prove this.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because my car died today, I met a very well-spoken and personable young AAA truck driver today. He was college aged and quite intelligent. I'm not sure what drove his decision, but his career choices (and those of others like him) are not helping the college dating scene for our daughters!

It's also impacting the experience of girls who are applying to college. Because there are so many more girls than boys applying to schools, and admissions folks try to "balance" gender by accepting a higher percentage of male applicants, admissions are much, much more competitive for girls at many popular schools such as Brown, Vassar etc.
I guess if you want to meet boys, go to trade school!

The issue is not lifting up women.

The issue is that over the past decade, there has been a coordinated effort to push down males and to discourage them from achieving. Most of the qualities that create good men, strong husbands, positive fathers and prociders have been branded as evil in the name of "toxic masculinity"

I have all sons. They are great kids who I have been raising to be good husbands, fathers and providers. They have had multiple teachers over the years openly disparage men, including regularly slamming "privileged white men" Is is any wonder that many of the young men, growing up in an environment where they and things that make quality adult men are openly disparaged in their schools and media, are now not seeking to achieve?

Maybe encourage them to seek co-provider partners? Sounds like you are doing a good job on focusing on positive values but maybe examine that provider lens a bit. Could be a bit of pressure and sexism going along with the positive message of responsibility.

What a bizarre response.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because my car died today, I met a very well-spoken and personable young AAA truck driver today. He was college aged and quite intelligent. I'm not sure what drove his decision, but his career choices (and those of others like him) are not helping the college dating scene for our daughters!

It's also impacting the experience of girls who are applying to college. Because there are so many more girls than boys applying to schools, and admissions folks try to "balance" gender by accepting a higher percentage of male applicants, admissions are much, much more competitive for girls at many popular schools such as Brown, Vassar etc.
I guess if you want to meet boys, go to trade school!

The issue is not lifting up women.

The issue is that over the past decade, there has been a coordinated effort to push down males and to discourage them from achieving. Most of the qualities that create good men, strong husbands, positive fathers and prociders have been branded as evil in the name of "toxic masculinity"

I have all sons. They are great kids who I have been raising to be good husbands, fathers and providers. They have had multiple teachers over the years openly disparage men, including regularly slamming "privileged white men" Is is any wonder that many of the young men, growing up in an environment where they and things that make quality adult men are openly disparaged in their schools and media, are now not seeking to achieve?

Maybe encourage them to seek co-provider partners? Sounds like you are doing a good job on focusing on positive values but maybe examine that provider lens a bit. Could be a bit of pressure and sexism going along with the positive message of responsibility.