Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What does she plan to do all day?

OP here. She said she needs to just relax and rest. Focus on her body and getting that in order. She wants to do a 60-90 day juice fast to see if that can help her.

Run away, run away, run away and save your life

Hope you guys aren’t considered common law spouses already…

Wear a condom every time

OP here. No common law in my state.

We don’t plan on having kids. I’m already snipped and she has fertility issues. Neither of us want kids.

What kind of guy gets snipped on his own?

Most men only do this after finishing having kids. You are not even married and got snipped on your own?? I don’t buy it.

Yup, troll vibe.

Wow you sound militant. Men don’t need permission from anyone to get a vasectomy.

Women complain all the time about being having to be the women who takes care of BC, but OP gets flamed for it? You must live in a tiny world lady. As a healthcare worker, there are a number of 20-30’s non-married men coming in for a vasectomy.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What does she plan to do all day?

OP here. She said she needs to just relax and rest. Focus on her body and getting that in order. She wants to do a 60-90 day juice fast to see if that can help her.

Run away, run away, run away and save your life

Hope you guys aren’t considered common law spouses already…

Wear a condom every time

OP here. No common law in my state.

We don’t plan on having kids. I’m already snipped and she has fertility issues. Neither of us want kids.

What kind of guy gets snipped on his own?

Most men only do this after finishing having kids. You are not even married and got snipped on your own?? I don’t buy it.

OP here. I knew I never wanted kids. It’s a way to make sure I didn’t accidentally have any. I got mine done at 32. I tried to get it done sooner but doctor advised me to wait.
You would’ve surprised how many men get one early on in life.

Do you think men need permission or somehow need to be married to get a vasectomy? I’m confused by your logic.

I’m married with 3 kids and in my forties. In our circles, men get them after they are done having kids.

The men I know don’t like the idea of being snipped but my sample is small. Dh is a surgeon, definitely does not want more kids and has not been in a rush to get snipped. We have talked about the topic with friends (all dads) and they cringe and the thought of it.

Like I said, my sample is small, maybe 20 men all over 40.

OP here. I have never wanted kids. I didn’t have to wait for marriage because kids were already off the table for me. I don’t like kids and was 100% sure u wouldn’t change my mind. I did not want to accidentally get someone pregnant. Plus, vasectomies are reversible if one desires to have kids.

Well you got a kid now! The Universe has a great sense of humor.

It would've made more sense if you two were to get married and have kids, considering she is 30 and you are 35 so good time to start family and SAHM until kids go to full time public school KG, collect any higher degree or certification etc.

If you were married, it could be an issue as you would be liable for any debt she collects and alimony if you divorce but that's not the case here. Do you think she would've supported you if you were in such position?

If you know her well, have been with her for two years, love her, want to marry her, have no plans to have expensive kids, she has a professional degree and history of employment, she has health issues and wants to take couple of months off to rest and reset while doing certification to change career, it seems fine to support this phase for her.

Obviously people here are jaded and suspicious because they don't know her but you do. You need to go with your gut feeling. Worst case scenario, she stays unemployed, you earn enough to support both of you and don't have kids to send to private schools and colleges. More likely scenario, she stays unemployed for a bit, gets bored and gets a job or goes to school. I don't see a huge issue here.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Where are her parents? Why can't they support her? As far as you supporting her, only if you've been with her for more than three years, intend to marry her and only for an agreed upon period shorter than three months.

OP here. Her parents are retired and live in another state. We are both grown adults. She’s 30.

I did intend to marry her but this has made me question if she’s the right partner for me.

It would give me pause too. Once you marry there are huge financial responsibilities that don’t necessarily go away if you divorce. This is especially true if you have kids.

It’s one thing to make a plan together where one or the other takes a break but or where one supports the family due to an unexpected job loss. It’s quite another to be forced into being a caretaker and fully responsible for supporting the family. I would not t continue in this relationship. And I would definitely no longer be engaging in any behavior where pregnancy is a potential consequence.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What does she plan to do all day?

OP here. She said she needs to just relax and rest. Focus on her body and getting that in order. She wants to do a 60-90 day juice fast to see if that can help her.

Run away, run away, run away and save your life

Hope you guys aren’t considered common law spouses already…

Wear a condom every time

OP here. No common law in my state.

We don’t plan on having kids. I’m already snipped and she has fertility issues. Neither of us want kids.

What kind of guy gets snipped on his own?

Most men only do this after finishing having kids. You are not even married and got snipped on your own?? I don’t buy it.

Yup, troll vibe.

OP you seem to have made up your mind about all of this. Genuinely, why did you even post?

Anonymous wrote:There is no such a thing as a telehealth degree btw. One has a degree to provide some type of medical service. The telehealth part just means using some online application to interact with the patients, instead of in person. That part can be accomplished by children nowadays.

OP here. I don’t say there was. I said she plans to get certifications and transition to Telehealth.

Certifications she wants to get

ACOMT
DN
OPC

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yeah a juice fast isn't going to fix her issues.

She needs to come up with an actual plan for life.

School sounds like a waste of time. She's already a PT.

What is she going to school for?


She needs to figure out a viable plan for life and a career that is not as physically straining but also doesn't require you to do all the work.

OP here. She thinks a juice fast will help with detox and inflammation. She sees it as a way to “reset” her body.

She is going to get some certificates to work remotely. I think her working remotely is best for her that way she can relax more. She doesn’t need it but says the extra skills will help her.

To be quite honest , this all sounds like BS, but it seems you're ultimately okay with it, so adjust your finances accordingly.

OP here. It’s not BS. She wants to work Telehealth go make things much easier for herself. I was all for that until she decided she didn’t want to do any of it.

Now she wants to take some time and do a juice fast. She said she will start working again over the summer or the fall. Her goal is to be working from home by September.

you don't need a special certificate.
A juice face isn't going to fix inflammation.

But it's clear you're fine with this and want to stay with her so, go do that and leave us alone with your nonsense.

There is no such a thing as a telehealth degree btw. One has a degree to provide some type of medical service. The telehealth part just means using some online application to interact with the patients, instead of in person. That part can be accomplished by children nowadays.

I'm surprised so many people want OP to support this deadbeat? If this was a man there is no way the consensus would be to just support him while he sits on his a*s.

She can take her rest at a friends house or place she rents. OP does not need to keep a leech, and he does not need to support one either.

Op, clearly I'm not your mother, but I'm sending this in her absence ... a big f g slap across the back of your head. Stop being stupid!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What does she plan to do all day?

OP here. She said she needs to just relax and rest. Focus on her body and getting that in order. She wants to do a 60-90 day juice fast to see if that can help her.

Run away, run away, run away and save your life

Hope you guys aren’t considered common law spouses already…

Wear a condom every time

OP here. No common law in my state.

We don’t plan on having kids. I’m already snipped and she has fertility issues. Neither of us want kids.

What kind of guy gets snipped on his own?

Most men only do this after finishing having kids. You are not even married and got snipped on your own?? I don’t buy it.

OP here. I knew I never wanted kids. It’s a way to make sure I didn’t accidentally have any. I got mine done at 32. I tried to get it done sooner but doctor advised me to wait.
You would’ve surprised how many men get one early on in life.

Do you think men need permission or somehow need to be married to get a vasectomy? I’m confused by your logic.

I’m married with 3 kids and in my forties. In our circles, men get them after they are done having kids.

The men I know don’t like the idea of being snipped but my sample is small. Dh is a surgeon, definitely does not want more kids and has not been in a rush to get snipped. We have talked about the topic with friends (all dads) and they cringe and the thought of it.

Like I said, my sample is small, maybe 20 men all over 40.

OP here. I have never wanted kids. I didn’t have to wait for marriage because kids were already off the table for me. I don’t like kids and was 100% sure u wouldn’t change my mind. I did not want to accidentally get someone pregnant. Plus, vasectomies are reversible if one desires to have kids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What does she plan to do all day?

OP here. She said she needs to just relax and rest. Focus on her body and getting that in order. She wants to do a 60-90 day juice fast to see if that can help her.

Run away, run away, run away and save your life

Hope you guys aren’t considered common law spouses already…

Wear a condom every time

OP here. No common law in my state.

We don’t plan on having kids. I’m already snipped and she has fertility issues. Neither of us want kids.

What kind of guy gets snipped on his own?

Most men only do this after finishing having kids. You are not even married and got snipped on your own?? I don’t buy it.

OP here. I knew I never wanted kids. It’s a way to make sure I didn’t accidentally have any. I got mine done at 32. I tried to get it done sooner but doctor advised me to wait.
You would’ve surprised how many men get one early on in life.

Do you think men need permission or somehow need to be married to get a vasectomy? I’m confused by your logic.

I’m married with 3 kids and in my forties. In our circles, men get them after they are done having kids.

The men I know don’t like the idea of being snipped but my sample is small. Dh is a surgeon, definitely does not want more kids and has not been in a rush to get snipped. We have talked about the topic with friends (all dads) and they cringe and the thought of it.

Like I said, my sample is small, maybe 20 men all over 40.

I hope these men who don’t want more kids but cringe at the idea of having a vasectomy are using condoms rather than expecting their wives to use hormonal birth controls, iuds, abortion etc