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Anonymous wrote:No, we did not get any help from our parents. Bought a 1.1 million dollar home and put $200,000. I’m proud of us!

Are you saying that you'd be less proud of your parents helped you? Why? What else should rich parents do with their money?

What is there to be proud of if your parents helped?
If they earned it themselves, they accomplished a difficult goal. If you’re parents give it to you, you didn’t have to do anything for it or put work or effort towards it.

What are you talking about? You still have to have a good job and make good money and have good credit to qualify for a mortgage for a decent house. So, yea, nothing to be proud of if the parents give you a house, but if they help with a down payment? Of course it's still something to be proud of.

I don’t think it’s the same. Especially if you personally didn’t have the cash for the full down payment yourself. (from your career, not additional help from parents)

Interesting. Because I sure do. I have hardworking kids who have always done everything right, so yeah I've helped them with down payments and think they should be proud. If they were deadbeats I'd never have done it. I'm also proud of MYSELF that I was able to help. My own parents couldn't.

Don't be jealous of people with more money than you.

You’re assuming they have more money. I own a 2m home with no help. They might be hardworking but surely you can see why someone who saved $200k+ with no help should be prouder? It’s more of an accomplishment. It just is.

I own a $2 million home and a $1 million home -- both without help. My kids bought houses with my help. I'm no prouder of myself than I am of them. So, nope. I disagree.

You’re also 60+. I am in my 30’s, it’s just different, trust me. Not comparable.

I know it's different nowadays and more costly. Trust me. But I have to assume that you (or your spouse/partner if you have one) could afford your expensive house at your young age because you sold out and got some soulless high paying corporate type job that does no one on the planet any good. I didn't want my kids to do that, and I'm proud that they didn't. I'm glad they chose another route.

Well this is a weird comment. Did you accumulate your wealth taking care of orphans? What is an acceptable job that allows a person to not have to get an allowance from their parents as an adult?

We're not talking about my wealth. We're talking about how this poster got $200k before 30 to buy a $1.1 million house. She did it by selling out. Probably biglaw.

By the way, how did the poster pay for college and grad school? She obviously didn't take out loans -- no way she could pay them off AND come up with $200k by 30. So we know the parents paid. Nothing to be proud of there, eh?

Again you’re making assumptions. You’re picking on someone your child’s age. Bizarre behavior lady. No grad school. Undergrad paid for by full athletic scholarship.

Also, house is 2m, purchased at 32. Not sure where you got 1.1 by 30.

Ok, I get it: you're super proud. So tells us how you got the money.

I just did. Again, reminder, you’re shaming someone your child’s age who worked for their own home and lifestyle. The fact that you don’t see how emotionally immature and bizarre this is says a lot about your character. This isn’t normal.

Nope. Remember who started the shame game. You're the one who suggested that my kids had less of a right to be proud of themselves than you do -- or that I have less of a right to be proud of them than had they done things your way. So if you want to know who started with the smugness and the smack talk and the boasting and the feeling of superiority, look in the mirror.

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Anonymous wrote:Did you get parental support (trust fund or DP help)?
How much is your current home/s worth?

DH and I would be SO embarrassed if we felt it necessary to get parental support to buy our house. There is no greater indication of failure in life than this. Our current home is worth $4.3M. We spent 10 years renting and saving up $1.5M, put $500K down on a $1M fixer-upper, then invested another $1M in a full-scale luxury renovation. DH and I rolled up our sleeves and did 100% of the work ourselves: electrical, porcelain tile, teak and ipe hardwoods, marble statues, detailed plaster ceilings, in-ground pool with Murano glass mosaic panels, etc…. Easily worth $4.3M now!

Still blows my mind when people accept handouts from family members and actually pay other people to do such simplistic things like pouring concrete slabs.

You sound like a jerk.

The PP sounds like a troll or someone with too much time on their hands. Sorry DH and I would rather spend our free time with our 3 kids, traveling, etc. than pouring concrete. But to each their own …

Very funny, OP. I loaned my mom money so she can buy her condo in 1999 abroad. I'm no bank and missed out on buying one for myself at that time. She also had full used of my car and I finally just put it under her name.
2007 I bought a farm abroad and my father live in it for free until I sold it in 2023. The farm was very expensive to pay monthly. It didn't produce anything.
I bought my own condo in 2008 in DC which I sold 12 years later.
My parents are in no position to help me. I am in very good position to help my kids and I will.

Anonymous wrote:Bought house in 30s in 2006. Not a good time. Saves money by living with roommates and then an apartment on my own. I thought my family was generous when I’d get $100-$150 (without the extra zeroes) for bday and Christmas combined. I would be ashamed if my my parents gave me money to pay for a wedding or house. Some people are real takers around here. I also paid my own way through college and paid my own bills. For those who inherited money after parents passed is different.

Just because your parents offer to pay, doesn’t mean you have to take their money.

How is this any different? I’m an only child. I will inherit everything from my parents someday. They paid for my wedding (in part because they wanted it to be a big affair they could invite all their friends too) and they wanted to help DH and I get on the property ladder early on in our 20s shortly after grad school. They said they’d rather help us early on so we can begin to build our own wealth while we’re still young than wait until we’re older to inherit. They can’t take their money with them and they have plenty to enjoy their retirement and set aside for elder care.

I guess we could have declined their money so an anonymous internet poster could think more highly of us, but in the meantime we were able to refi to a < 3% mortgage and watch our property value go up while our incomes also rise. I’m very grateful for my parents and plan to help my own kids as much as I can someday.

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Anonymous wrote:No, we did not get any help from our parents. Bought a 1.1 million dollar home and put $200,000. I’m proud of us!

Are you saying that you'd be less proud of your parents helped you? Why? What else should rich parents do with their money?

What is there to be proud of if your parents helped?
If they earned it themselves, they accomplished a difficult goal. If you’re parents give it to you, you didn’t have to do anything for it or put work or effort towards it.

What are you talking about? You still have to have a good job and make good money and have good credit to qualify for a mortgage for a decent house. So, yea, nothing to be proud of if the parents give you a house, but if they help with a down payment? Of course it's still something to be proud of.

I don’t think it’s the same. Especially if you personally didn’t have the cash for the full down payment yourself. (from your career, not additional help from parents)

Interesting. Because I sure do. I have hardworking kids who have always done everything right, so yeah I've helped them with down payments and think they should be proud. If they were deadbeats I'd never have done it. I'm also proud of MYSELF that I was able to help. My own parents couldn't.

Don't be jealous of people with more money than you.

You’re assuming they have more money. I own a 2m home with no help. They might be hardworking but surely you can see why someone who saved $200k+ with no help should be prouder? It’s more of an accomplishment. It just is.

I own a $2 million home and a $1 million home -- both without help. My kids bought houses with my help. I'm no prouder of myself than I am of them. So, nope. I disagree.

You’re also 60+. I am in my 30’s, it’s just different, trust me. Not comparable.

I know it's different nowadays and more costly. Trust me. But I have to assume that you (or your spouse/partner if you have one) could afford your expensive house at your young age because you sold out and got some soulless high paying corporate type job that does no one on the planet any good. I didn't want my kids to do that, and I'm proud that they didn't. I'm glad they chose another route.

Well this is a weird comment. Did you accumulate your wealth taking care of orphans? What is an acceptable job that allows a person to not have to get an allowance from their parents as an adult?

We're not talking about my wealth. We're talking about how this poster got $200k before 30 to buy a $1.1 million house. She did it by selling out. Probably biglaw.

By the way, how did the poster pay for college and grad school? She obviously didn't take out loans -- no way she could pay them off AND come up with $200k by 30. So we know the parents paid. Nothing to be proud of there, eh?

Again you’re making assumptions. You’re picking on someone your child’s age. Bizarre behavior lady. No grad school. Undergrad paid for by full athletic scholarship.

Also, house is 2m, purchased at 32. Not sure where you got 1.1 by 30.

Ok, I get it: you're super proud. So tells us how you got the money.

I just did. Again, reminder, you’re shaming someone your child’s age who worked for their own home and lifestyle. The fact that you don’t see how emotionally immature and bizarre this is says a lot about your character. This isn’t normal.

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Anonymous wrote:No, we did not get any help from our parents. Bought a 1.1 million dollar home and put $200,000. I’m proud of us!

Are you saying that you'd be less proud of your parents helped you? Why? What else should rich parents do with their money?

What is there to be proud of if your parents helped?
If they earned it themselves, they accomplished a difficult goal. If you’re parents give it to you, you didn’t have to do anything for it or put work or effort towards it.

What are you talking about? You still have to have a good job and make good money and have good credit to qualify for a mortgage for a decent house. So, yea, nothing to be proud of if the parents give you a house, but if they help with a down payment? Of course it's still something to be proud of.

I don’t think it’s the same. Especially if you personally didn’t have the cash for the full down payment yourself. (from your career, not additional help from parents)

Interesting. Because I sure do. I have hardworking kids who have always done everything right, so yeah I've helped them with down payments and think they should be proud. If they were deadbeats I'd never have done it. I'm also proud of MYSELF that I was able to help. My own parents couldn't.

Don't be jealous of people with more money than you.

You’re assuming they have more money. I own a 2m home with no help. They might be hardworking but surely you can see why someone who saved $200k+ with no help should be prouder? It’s more of an accomplishment. It just is.

I own a $2 million home and a $1 million home -- both without help. My kids bought houses with my help. I'm no prouder of myself than I am of them. So, nope. I disagree.

You’re also 60+. I am in my 30’s, it’s just different, trust me. Not comparable.

I know it's different nowadays and more costly. Trust me. But I have to assume that you (or your spouse/partner if you have one) could afford your expensive house at your young age because you sold out and got some soulless high paying corporate type job that does no one on the planet any good. I didn't want my kids to do that, and I'm proud that they didn't. I'm glad they chose another route.

Well this is a weird comment. Did you accumulate your wealth taking care of orphans? What is an acceptable job that allows a person to not have to get an allowance from their parents as an adult?

We're not talking about my wealth. We're talking about how this poster got $200k before 30 to buy a $1.1 million house. She did it by selling out. Probably biglaw.

By the way, how did the poster pay for college and grad school? She obviously didn't take out loans -- no way she could pay them off AND come up with $200k by 30. So we know the parents paid. Nothing to be proud of there, eh?

Again you’re making assumptions. You’re picking on someone your child’s age. Bizarre behavior lady. No grad school. Undergrad paid for by full athletic scholarship.

Also, house is 2m, purchased at 32. Not sure where you got 1.1 by 30.

Ok, I get it: you're super proud. So tells us how you got the money.

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Anonymous wrote:No, we did not get any help from our parents. Bought a 1.1 million dollar home and put $200,000. I’m proud of us!

Are you saying that you'd be less proud of your parents helped you? Why? What else should rich parents do with their money?

What is there to be proud of if your parents helped?
If they earned it themselves, they accomplished a difficult goal. If you’re parents give it to you, you didn’t have to do anything for it or put work or effort towards it.

What are you talking about? You still have to have a good job and make good money and have good credit to qualify for a mortgage for a decent house. So, yea, nothing to be proud of if the parents give you a house, but if they help with a down payment? Of course it's still something to be proud of.

I don’t think it’s the same. Especially if you personally didn’t have the cash for the full down payment yourself. (from your career, not additional help from parents)

Interesting. Because I sure do. I have hardworking kids who have always done everything right, so yeah I've helped them with down payments and think they should be proud. If they were deadbeats I'd never have done it. I'm also proud of MYSELF that I was able to help. My own parents couldn't.

Don't be jealous of people with more money than you.

You’re assuming they have more money. I own a 2m home with no help. They might be hardworking but surely you can see why someone who saved $200k+ with no help should be prouder? It’s more of an accomplishment. It just is.

I own a $2 million home and a $1 million home -- both without help. My kids bought houses with my help. I'm no prouder of myself than I am of them. So, nope. I disagree.

You’re also 60+. I am in my 30’s, it’s just different, trust me. Not comparable.

I know it's different nowadays and more costly. Trust me. But I have to assume that you (or your spouse/partner if you have one) could afford your expensive house at your young age because you sold out and got some soulless high paying corporate type job that does no one on the planet any good. I didn't want my kids to do that, and I'm proud that they didn't. I'm glad they chose another route.

You’re reaching here and quite frankly rude. No sorry, not a soulless high paying corporate job. Shaming people your kids age who have to work? It’s pathetic. Maybe you need to do a little soul searching yourself.

What's the job? Please tell us what industry you were in that allowed you to come up with all of that money by yourself without any help from parents. Also tell us, did they pay for college? Did you live with them after college and save money? Seriously, how did you come up with all of that money with zero help from anyone else? Did you find it in a ditch?

Full athletic scholarship. No never lived with them. Tech (climate technology) so yes it’s actually a job that does contribute to society.

My 96 year old aunt gave me a down payment of 65k in 1996. House is worth $1.1 million now. I was recently widowed at a young age. Was life changing.

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Anonymous wrote:No, we did not get any help from our parents. Bought a 1.1 million dollar home and put $200,000. I’m proud of us!

Are you saying that you'd be less proud of your parents helped you? Why? What else should rich parents do with their money?

What is there to be proud of if your parents helped?
If they earned it themselves, they accomplished a difficult goal. If you’re parents give it to you, you didn’t have to do anything for it or put work or effort towards it.

What are you talking about? You still have to have a good job and make good money and have good credit to qualify for a mortgage for a decent house. So, yea, nothing to be proud of if the parents give you a house, but if they help with a down payment? Of course it's still something to be proud of.

I don’t think it’s the same. Especially if you personally didn’t have the cash for the full down payment yourself. (from your career, not additional help from parents)

Interesting. Because I sure do. I have hardworking kids who have always done everything right, so yeah I've helped them with down payments and think they should be proud. If they were deadbeats I'd never have done it. I'm also proud of MYSELF that I was able to help. My own parents couldn't.

Don't be jealous of people with more money than you.

You’re assuming they have more money. I own a 2m home with no help. They might be hardworking but surely you can see why someone who saved $200k+ with no help should be prouder? It’s more of an accomplishment. It just is.

I own a $2 million home and a $1 million home -- both without help. My kids bought houses with my help. I'm no prouder of myself than I am of them. So, nope. I disagree.

You’re also 60+. I am in my 30’s, it’s just different, trust me. Not comparable.

I know it's different nowadays and more costly. Trust me. But I have to assume that you (or your spouse/partner if you have one) could afford your expensive house at your young age because you sold out and got some soulless high paying corporate type job that does no one on the planet any good. I didn't want my kids to do that, and I'm proud that they didn't. I'm glad they chose another route.

Well this is a weird comment. Did you accumulate your wealth taking care of orphans? What is an acceptable job that allows a person to not have to get an allowance from their parents as an adult?

We're not talking about my wealth. We're talking about how this poster got $200k before 30 to buy a $1.1 million house. She did it by selling out. Probably biglaw.

By the way, how did the poster pay for college and grad school? She obviously didn't take out loans -- no way she could pay them off AND come up with $200k by 30. So we know the parents paid. Nothing to be proud of there, eh?

Again you’re making assumptions. You’re picking on someone your child’s age. Bizarre behavior lady. No grad school. Undergrad paid for by full athletic scholarship.

Also, house is 2m, purchased at 32. Not sure where you got 1.1 by 30.

FIL gave us $10k towards a down payment when we were buying our first house back in 2004.

Yep! We used DH’s trust as the down payment. Made a world of difference. By the time our kids are looking to buy a house, we’ll be able to liquidate a ROTH tax free and give them that money as down payments. Should have plenty in other retirement accounts for ourselves and to leave them a decent inheritance.

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Anonymous wrote:No, we did not get any help from our parents. Bought a 1.1 million dollar home and put $200,000. I’m proud of us!

Are you saying that you'd be less proud of your parents helped you? Why? What else should rich parents do with their money?

What is there to be proud of if your parents helped?
If they earned it themselves, they accomplished a difficult goal. If you’re parents give it to you, you didn’t have to do anything for it or put work or effort towards it.

What are you talking about? You still have to have a good job and make good money and have good credit to qualify for a mortgage for a decent house. So, yea, nothing to be proud of if the parents give you a house, but if they help with a down payment? Of course it's still something to be proud of.

I don’t think it’s the same. Especially if you personally didn’t have the cash for the full down payment yourself. (from your career, not additional help from parents)

Interesting. Because I sure do. I have hardworking kids who have always done everything right, so yeah I've helped them with down payments and think they should be proud. If they were deadbeats I'd never have done it. I'm also proud of MYSELF that I was able to help. My own parents couldn't.

Don't be jealous of people with more money than you.

You’re assuming they have more money. I own a 2m home with no help. They might be hardworking but surely you can see why someone who saved $200k+ with no help should be prouder? It’s more of an accomplishment. It just is.

I own a $2 million home and a $1 million home -- both without help. My kids bought houses with my help. I'm no prouder of myself than I am of them. So, nope. I disagree.

You’re also 60+. I am in my 30’s, it’s just different, trust me. Not comparable.

I know it's different nowadays and more costly. Trust me. But I have to assume that you (or your spouse/partner if you have one) could afford your expensive house at your young age because you sold out and got some soulless high paying corporate type job that does no one on the planet any good. I didn't want my kids to do that, and I'm proud that they didn't. I'm glad they chose another route.

You’re reaching here and quite frankly rude. No sorry, not a soulless high paying corporate job. Shaming people your kids age who have to work? It’s pathetic. Maybe you need to do a little soul searching yourself.

What's the job? Please tell us what industry you were in that allowed you to come up with all of that money by yourself without any help from parents. Also tell us, did they pay for college? Did you live with them after college and save money? Seriously, how did you come up with all of that money with zero help from anyone else? Did you find it in a ditch?

And my house is 2m not 1.1 and bought it when I was 32 not before 30. No idea where you got those numbers.

No
$7.5M

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Anonymous wrote:No, we did not get any help from our parents. Bought a 1.1 million dollar home and put $200,000. I’m proud of us!

Are you saying that you'd be less proud of your parents helped you? Why? What else should rich parents do with their money?

What is there to be proud of if your parents helped?
If they earned it themselves, they accomplished a difficult goal. If you’re parents give it to you, you didn’t have to do anything for it or put work or effort towards it.

What are you talking about? You still have to have a good job and make good money and have good credit to qualify for a mortgage for a decent house. So, yea, nothing to be proud of if the parents give you a house, but if they help with a down payment? Of course it's still something to be proud of.

I don’t think it’s the same. Especially if you personally didn’t have the cash for the full down payment yourself. (from your career, not additional help from parents)

Interesting. Because I sure do. I have hardworking kids who have always done everything right, so yeah I've helped them with down payments and think they should be proud. If they were deadbeats I'd never have done it. I'm also proud of MYSELF that I was able to help. My own parents couldn't.

Don't be jealous of people with more money than you.

You’re assuming they have more money. I own a 2m home with no help. They might be hardworking but surely you can see why someone who saved $200k+ with no help should be prouder? It’s more of an accomplishment. It just is.

I used family money for housing and I definitely wouldn’t say I’m proud of my house or see it as an accomplishment. It’s just a house. I don’t really feel I’m missing out though. I have other accomplishments I think.

+1
Fine to get financial help but there’s nothing to be proud of. It’s not your accomplishment to be proud of. You can be proud of other things in your life.

NP here. My parents gifted us 100k toward a DP to combine with the 150k we had saved. It was the difference between a house close-in that has greatly appreciated and living outside the beltway with crappy commute.

The quality of life increase was totally worth it to live in a walkable neighborhood we love vs. a car dependent neighborhood with long commute even if we don’t get to be “proud” of fully saving the DP on our own. I can live with that.