OP here. I do not want to identify myself or my child by sharing school or district. It is in the DMV, further out in NoVA.

Small catholic to midsize middle (~600 kids)

Honestly this is a useless thread without knowing the specific middle school and private school. We pulled my kid from a public middle school where DC had the highest GPA and was in the most advanced math course but was basically a year behind when DC got to private HS. And that’s not even talking about the serious safety issues such as the fights, the kids who OD’d on campus, the ambulances that showed up at school, and the kids who vaped in class.

So if I was advising OP, my advice would be to prepare much easier and very weak academics, vaping in class, serious problems with drug culture, and never using the bathroom because of the danger and filth there. But that’s if she’s going from a rigorous private to the specific public middle school my kid attended. She could be going from a hippie Waldorfy type private where she’s never had homework to one of the middle school that are supposedly academically rigorous. Or going from a small private that serves a primarily religious and poorer community to one of the wealthy public schools, where brand name is everything. Those are going to be a very different experiences.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also adding to my FCPS post - there has been almost zero homework or anything done at home even in honors classes. The academics are not strenuous.

Sounds like your kid needs to be in some AP classes.

There aren’t any in middle school, which is what this thread is about. OP is asking about a 6th grader.

Anonymous wrote:Also adding to my FCPS post - there has been almost zero homework or anything done at home even in honors classes. The academics are not strenuous.

Sounds like your kid needs to be in some AP classes.

Also adding to my FCPS post - there has been almost zero homework or anything done at home even in honors classes. The academics are not strenuous.

Anonymous wrote:IP here. So clothes don’t matter? Are kids wearing sweats and jammies? We wanted to wait to get her a phone until 8th or 9th. Is that unrealistic?

Not realistic. Get her a phone now. There will be people here who say they waited but they will be in the minority and most kids have them. She will coordinate her own social life.

FCPS here and some wear jeans. Any brand backpack is fine but make it a solid color. They carry them all day. Yes to sweats and pj pants. Be prepared to see very tiny tops that look like bras as well as lots of cropped tops. Some girls have Lulu etc but it doesn’t have to be their entire wardrobe.

As for the bathrooms, my daughter uses it. She said the warnings were overly dramatic and she knows the ones to avoid because of drugs. I was concerned over violence etc and girls with periods but she said this has been a non issue.

Anonymous wrote:IP here. So clothes don’t matter? Are kids wearing sweats and jammies? We wanted to wait to get her a phone until 8th or 9th. Is that unrealistic?

It depends on the school. No one cares at our school. Richer schools care. Get the kid a phone with limits and restrictions.

IP here. So clothes don’t matter? Are kids wearing sweats and jammies? We wanted to wait to get her a phone until 8th or 9th. Is that unrealistic?

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Anonymous wrote:Learn the late work/retest policy early. Kids who master this really use it to their advantage.

How so? To earn an 80? That’s the highest grade allowed on retests and late assignments.

Depends on the school, and sometimes teachers. DD's teachers only allow retests on summatives, not formatives. No one allows grades higher than an 89. Some require getting permission to retest, which requires showing that they have in fact, put in effort to learn the material. Late work turned in within a week or two seem to have no penalties.

Wow. Would never send mine to a school that permitted retests and late work. No wonder kids think they can away with anything.

It's not really "Wow". That's fine, but please don't come back when your kids are applying to college and then cry on the DCUM college thread that your kid isn't getting as strong college acceptances as the kids attending schools with permitted retests and late work. There are too many of those on those threads already.

It's funny how when grades don't count you get lots of high-and-mighty folks, but then they go ballistic when it matters for college.

My senior didn't need it. No crying here!

I do wonder why you're bragging about allowing your children to be mediocre, though.

I am not bragging about anything. I am just pointing out that there are way too many parents on the college boards complaining about their kids' friends getting accepted into colleges they deem superior to their kids' options.

As long as you don't turn out to be one of those complainers...we are all good.

BTW, considering literally every public school district in the DMV has these policies (DCPS, MCPS, believe FCPS) and schools like Whitman, Churchill, Langley, etc. have plenty of impressive kids...why is it allowing your children to be mediocre just because their school district allows these policies?

You do not have to encourage or even allow your children to make use of these policies. I'm sorry they're such poor students that you need to. Maybe tutoring or a remedial class would be a better option?

Hmm…I mean my kid scored 1580 on the SAT with a perfect Math score. Even with retests allowed.

Every time you post, you just dig a deeper hole. Not sure why you keep digging.

I’m guessing she feels good when she compares her kid to kids who are struggling and need to retest to get an 80. Which is odd since her kid seems to be doing well. I hope for her sake she can find a way to feel happy about her son’s accomplishments without putting down kids who aren’t doing as well but are trying.

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Anonymous wrote:Stop by Lululemon and get her a gray Swiftly Tech and neutral leggings. My daughters enjoy shopping at Hollister, American Eagle/Aerie, Brandy Melville, and Marshall’s/TJ Maxx. I also recommend a Stanley and a North Face backpack that will last a long time.

oh please. My kid doesn't have anything from Lulu or a Stanley, and they're fine. Doesn't get made fun of.

DC has bought clothes from Old Navy, even Target. Some of the kids go to Goodwill and consignment shops.

You people are crazy.

Exactly. My kid is mainly adidas, levis, gap (or what ever I get on clearance) with a bunch of no name stuff, including Walmart and no one cares or says anything. Sneakers are usually $30, sometimes less for adidas.

They don't want any of that non-sense.

+1 being materialistic is more of an issue with pricey privates, not large publics.

+1 All the posts saying to by such and such labels are private school parents pretending they know what a large urban public is like. Brand whoring is small school clique s**t. Kids care less about brands at the large urban publics. Tons of kids will have no-name chinese stuff from Amazon, even the popular kids

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Anonymous wrote:My kid switched in 6th. It was the perfect year. She got involved, made friends, and found her place. She is a little more “innocent”and it took a full year to “catch up.”

Advocating for yourself is the biggest switch. Private schools parents usually call teachers or administrators. That’s a no-no in public unless there’s a special need, health issue or bullying. Kids will have to learn to go to the teacher on their own when it comes to assignments.

Try to make a friend or two before school starts. It’s nice to have someone who can introduce your kid around or a place to sit at lunch.

Kids make friends in their classes. There’s a lot of group work. They start text chains so your kid should have a smart phone to participate.

Highly encourage sports or activities. You want to engaged, but not so busy where she doesn’t have time to spend with friends. Good luck!

Get them an iphone. Kids use imessages, and androids don't play well with imessages. My kids learned that the hard way.

FWIW, I have an android, and I hate iphones.

This is a post by a kid who wants their parents to get them an iPhone. Good lord, LOL.

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Anonymous wrote:Learn the late work/retest policy early. Kids who master this really use it to their advantage.

How so? To earn an 80? That’s the highest grade allowed on retests and late assignments.

Depends on the school, and sometimes teachers. DD's teachers only allow retests on summatives, not formatives. No one allows grades higher than an 89. Some require getting permission to retest, which requires showing that they have in fact, put in effort to learn the material. Late work turned in within a week or two seem to have no penalties.

Wow. Would never send mine to a school that permitted retests and late work. No wonder kids think they can away with anything.

It's not really "Wow". That's fine, but please don't come back when your kids are applying to college and then cry on the DCUM college thread that your kid isn't getting as strong college acceptances as the kids attending schools with permitted retests and late work. There are too many of those on those threads already.

It's funny how when grades don't count you get lots of high-and-mighty folks, but then they go ballistic when it matters for college.

My senior didn't need it. No crying here!

I do wonder why you're bragging about allowing your children to be mediocre, though.

I am not bragging about anything. I am just pointing out that there are way too many parents on the college boards complaining about their kids' friends getting accepted into colleges they deem superior to their kids' options.

As long as you don't turn out to be one of those complainers...we are all good.

BTW, considering literally every public school district in the DMV has these policies (DCPS, MCPS, believe FCPS) and schools like Whitman, Churchill, Langley, etc. have plenty of impressive kids...why is it allowing your children to be mediocre just because their school district allows these policies?

You do not have to encourage or even allow your children to make use of these policies. I'm sorry they're such poor students that you need to. Maybe tutoring or a remedial class would be a better option?

Hmm…I mean my kid scored 1580 on the SAT with a perfect Math score. Even with retests allowed.

Every time you post, you just dig a deeper hole. Not sure why you keep digging.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Learn the late work/retest policy early. Kids who master this really use it to their advantage.

How so? To earn an 80? That’s the highest grade allowed on retests and late assignments.

Depends on the school, and sometimes teachers. DD's teachers only allow retests on summatives, not formatives. No one allows grades higher than an 89. Some require getting permission to retest, which requires showing that they have in fact, put in effort to learn the material. Late work turned in within a week or two seem to have no penalties.

Wow. Would never send mine to a school that permitted retests and late work. No wonder kids think they can away with anything.

It's not really "Wow". That's fine, but please don't come back when your kids are applying to college and then cry on the DCUM college thread that your kid isn't getting as strong college acceptances as the kids attending schools with permitted retests and late work. There are too many of those on those threads already.

It's funny how when grades don't count you get lots of high-and-mighty folks, but then they go ballistic when it matters for college.

My senior didn't need it. No crying here!

I do wonder why you're bragging about allowing your children to be mediocre, though.

So what college?

University of Chicago. Yes, I know, it's not an Ivy, but we're happy with it, and more importantly, he didn't need to cheat to get accepted with his 4.0/4.6. Like I told the PP, tutoring would be a more ethical way to raise her children's GPA.

FCPS allows retakes but the highest grade one can receive on a retake is an eighty. Eighty percent does not translate to a high GPA. The kids with the super high GPAs are not retaking tests.

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Learn the late work/retest policy early. Kids who master this really use it to their advantage.

How so? To earn an 80? That’s the highest grade allowed on retests and late assignments.

Depends on the school, and sometimes teachers. DD's teachers only allow retests on summatives, not formatives. No one allows grades higher than an 89. Some require getting permission to retest, which requires showing that they have in fact, put in effort to learn the material. Late work turned in within a week or two seem to have no penalties.

Wow. Would never send mine to a school that permitted retests and late work. No wonder kids think they can away with anything.

It's not really "Wow". That's fine, but please don't come back when your kids are applying to college and then cry on the DCUM college thread that your kid isn't getting as strong college acceptances as the kids attending schools with permitted retests and late work. There are too many of those on those threads already.

It's funny how when grades don't count you get lots of high-and-mighty folks, but then they go ballistic when it matters for college.

My senior didn't need it. No crying here!

I do wonder why you're bragging about allowing your children to be mediocre, though.

So what college?

University of Chicago. Yes, I know, it's not an Ivy, but we're happy with it, and more importantly, he didn't need to cheat to get accepted with his 4.0/4.6. Like I told the PP, tutoring would be a more ethical way to raise her children's GPA.

U Chicago takes basically all the private school losers. They send mailers out to anyone in hopes to just get applications to juice their rankings (and they are now falling again).

My kid is at a top 5 and has a nearly 4.0…somehow even attending a school district that allows retakes. Wow, go figure.

So…who has the mediocre kid now.

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Learn the late work/retest policy early. Kids who master this really use it to their advantage.

How so? To earn an 80? That’s the highest grade allowed on retests and late assignments.

Depends on the school, and sometimes teachers. DD's teachers only allow retests on summatives, not formatives. No one allows grades higher than an 89. Some require getting permission to retest, which requires showing that they have in fact, put in effort to learn the material. Late work turned in within a week or two seem to have no penalties.

Wow. Would never send mine to a school that permitted retests and late work. No wonder kids think they can away with anything.

It's not really "Wow". That's fine, but please don't come back when your kids are applying to college and then cry on the DCUM college thread that your kid isn't getting as strong college acceptances as the kids attending schools with permitted retests and late work. There are too many of those on those threads already.

It's funny how when grades don't count you get lots of high-and-mighty folks, but then they go ballistic when it matters for college.

My senior didn't need it. No crying here!

I do wonder why you're bragging about allowing your children to be mediocre, though.

So what college?

University of Chicago. Yes, I know, it's not an Ivy, but we're happy with it, and more importantly, he didn't need to cheat to get accepted with his 4.0/4.6. Like I told the PP, tutoring would be a more ethical way to raise her children's GPA.