Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We were poor for the first 10 years of my life, but those years had an affect on me for sure. I'm constantly fighting intrusive thoughts that we're one paycheck away from living under a bridge - could not be further from the truth but I still can't shake the notion. I hoard takeout napkins and condiments. I re-use foil when possible. I turn my ketchup bottles upside down to get the last drop.

I hate that I have such an unhealthy relationship with money.

DH made fun of me for halving our napkins. I found it to be such a waste that we would wipe our mouths once, and throw them out.

I also have a big tupperware full of takeout ketchup packets.

I cut them in 1/2 too and use 1 a day not 1 per meal.

Oh man, you would hate me. I accidentally grabbed two today for lunch and ended up throwing them both away (I used them both on accident so even though I guess the bottom one maybe wasn't dirty, it was all crumpled up). I am actually pretty strict about recycling/reusing most things, too.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm opposite you on clothes, OP. I wear and use things until they fall apart. DH just picked up my nail clipper and asked how old it was, because he claimed it looked worn. I got it around 12 or 13. He went to Target that week and got me a new one. I'm 46. He also nearly fell over when he found out my lip balms were about 5 or 6 years old. He bought me four new ones on that same Target trip and threw out my old ones. I only JUST last year got rid of the last of the white socks I had for gym in high school. I'm 47. When I finish a tissue box, I then use the box for trash before throwing it out. Still quite frugal, still take excellent care of everything I have because I appreciate everything I have so much.

I'm...confused.

Ha, you must not be in your mid-40's because I honestly don't care how old I am right now. I'm 40-something so I'm older than 40 and younger than 50. Not PP by the way, but I have totally given the wrong age or had to think about it for a minute now.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We were poor for the first 10 years of my life, but those years had an affect on me for sure. I'm constantly fighting intrusive thoughts that we're one paycheck away from living under a bridge - could not be further from the truth but I still can't shake the notion. I hoard takeout napkins and condiments. I re-use foil when possible. I turn my ketchup bottles upside down to get the last drop.

I hate that I have such an unhealthy relationship with money.

DH made fun of me for halving our napkins. I found it to be such a waste that we would wipe our mouths once, and throw them out.

I also have a big tupperware full of takeout ketchup packets.

I cut them in 1/2 too and use 1 a day not 1 per meal.

Oh man, you would hate me. I accidentally grabbed two today for lunch and ended up throwing them both away (I used them both on accident so even though I guess the bottom one maybe wasn't dirty, it was all crumpled up). I am actually pretty strict about recycling/reusing most things, too.

Anonymous wrote:So many of your stories are familiar! We were really poor, and get bags of clothes from relatives with older kids. The shirts had big pit stains, rips, worn out. Now when I donate clothes, if I wouldn't put it on or have my kid wear it, I use it for rags. I donate the clothes she grows out of, but are still in perfect shape (thankfully she isn't tough on clothing). I feel it's really disrespectful to think that just because someone is poor that they should take your garbage stuff.

My best friend as a kid - she wasn't poor but her dad was a notorious cheapskate. the rule for toilet paper was - 1 square for pee. 2 squares for poo. IDK how he regulated. LOL.

Now I used odds and ends for cooking (utensils) and my husband will say - why don't you use X (like spatula, for instance) and I say I don't have one. He says - well buy one! It doesn't occur to me because I always had to make do.

Another thing was I got my first job in 8th grade (delivering newspapers), then I worked in for the city (there was a poor kid program) at 14. As soon as I started working my mother made me pay "room and board".

My child has everything she needs, and then some. Lots of underwear, socks, bras. Sheets that MATCH with their pillowcases and even the blankets!

I remember we needed to bring a watercolor set to school in 5th grade. I didn't ask my mother, because I knew we didn't have the money. Every day the teacher would ask why I didn't bring it in. I was the only kid in the class without it.

it never leaves you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We grew up poor. We’re not rich now but not poor. I still only order water in a restaurant and I get a lot of clothes from the thrift store for myself annd my kid even though I can afford new, I can’t justify it.

Where I spend now is on my kid. I missed out on activities as a child because of money and I knew I couldn’t ask. I never want my kid to feel like that so if she wants to do a sport or go somewhere I make it happen.

+1 I could’ve written this post.

My parents were children during the Depression/WW2 era and we had little when I was growing up. Canned foods were somewhat of an exception because both had literally gone to bed hungry (more than a few times). I still have a bit of a hoarder/prepper mentality with food/staples. Came in handy during COVID!

Love my “old” clothes, though, still shop in thrift/second hand stores (I figure someone else liked it enough, too, to buy it the first time!).

DH likewise grew up on the very wrong side of town and has clawed his way to having helped create this very nice life we have.

Kids are “spoiled” with our time and, perhaps, a few too many activities but I’m ok with that. Stuff? Not so much.

And, shhhh, I also still have my nail clippers from high school way too many decades ago. I’d be crushed if I lost or broke them. “Trim” brand. Love ‘em!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We were poor for the first 10 years of my life, but those years had an affect on me for sure. I'm constantly fighting intrusive thoughts that we're one paycheck away from living under a bridge - could not be further from the truth but I still can't shake the notion. I hoard takeout napkins and condiments. I re-use foil when possible. I turn my ketchup bottles upside down to get the last drop.

I hate that I have such an unhealthy relationship with money.

DH made fun of me for halving our napkins. I found it to be such a waste that we would wipe our mouths once, and throw them out.

I also have a big tupperware full of takeout ketchup packets.

I cut them in 1/2 too and use 1 a day not 1 per meal.

Anonymous wrote:I can’t accept free food. Even if it’s at a fancy event, even if everybody else is helping themselves. I always say I’m not hungry because I feel so much shame any time I accept free food.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But you are not now, what are some things you do that you know are directly related to how you grew up?

We fly direct even if more expensive. I remember a family vacation where we flew to Florida and I swear we changed planes 3 times and landed somewhere else in the state and drove 2 hours because it was cheaper that way.

This is not poor. Poor people never ever fly.

PP flies direct *now*. Not back then.

Anonymous wrote:We were poor for the first 10 years of my life, but those years had an affect on me for sure. I'm constantly fighting intrusive thoughts that we're one paycheck away from living under a bridge - could not be further from the truth but I still can't shake the notion. I hoard takeout napkins and condiments. I re-use foil when possible. I turn my ketchup bottles upside down to get the last drop.

I hate that I have such an unhealthy relationship with money.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most of mine are food related:

EVERYONE gets a drink at a restaurant. Kids want a Shirley Temple? Fine. Get a refill!

We don’t often WANT it, but dessert is an option that’s always on the table. Same with appetizers.

I will splurge on expensive spaghetti sauce and nicer pasta. I buy REAL Parmesan. I spend a small fortune on good EVOO. We buy the expensive ice cream. We eat some form of meat almost every single day. I buy giant roasts or steaks for the weekend. Quality cheeses, fancy crackers, nice cured meats. Things like that.

But I also panic like you about “worst case scenarios”. I have a number I like to keep in savings and I panic if something take us below it.

The meat hit home. We NEVER had meat growing up. If we did, it was canned chicken, those canned beef Chinese chow mein dishes, or canned tuna. And Spam. Or cubed steak. I didn’t have a real steak or actual chicken breast until I was in my late teens.

We also eat a ton of quality meat.

Pp from 17:30. We had spam and cubed steak too — I hate cube steak! When my mom brought chicken she got chicken backs and cooked them as if they were regular chicken pieces. She covered them in flour, baked them, and called it “chicken shake-n-bake.” We knew it wasn’t shake n bake like in a regular house, lol.