Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All the girls that rush want the top 3 houses (the actual top sororities will vary by school). Yes, they go through the instagrams to figure out if you were popular in high school, which private school you went to, sleepaway camp, etc. Also to see how you dress, your HHI, etc. This 100% happens at every school.

You're wrong, not everyone wants the top 3. My DD went in knowing she wouldn't fit with those girls and knew she'd be dropped, which she of course she was. She did say they were very nice and she was pleasantly surprised by them. But it is absolutely about wealth and connections in those sororities and at UVA those girls come from boarding schools in the Northeast. If you are not already known to them before rush, you're probably not getting in, even if you're a legacy.

UVA is slowly changing. While Greek life will be somewhat important, it won't be as important as it once was. UVA is getting kids from different backgrounds even out of state kids.

LOL. Just because UVA is trying to rewrite its extensive history, doesn't mean it is succeeding at doing so. Greek Life will always be synonymous with UVA.

Bitter? UVA is only 26% Greek. The vast majority of UVA kids don't even pledge. Mine didn't.

The university says it’s 35% Greek.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Good luck to any of you who have girls going into pref today. I know it's probably been a stressful week for the girls and there are probably tears this morning. The Friday cuts are the worst at the higher ranked sororities especially because girls felt that they had a shot still if they were there for house tours. My dd had her painful cuts earlier in the week but had many friends who were devastated on pref day. It all worked out though, even if they didn't get their top choices from earlier in the week, they all seem happy where they ended up.

“Devastated” on pref day?

Dear lord. Reality check please.

You have never really wanted something and it didn’t happen? These are 18 and 19 year olds.

Have you always been so callous or is this a learned character defect?

That’s right. And 18-19 years old is about the time most of us start to realize that our perception of ourselves is not necessarily how the rest of the world views us. It’s a wake up and grow up moment.

I would question why membership in a certain sorority is of such consequence to a girls perception of herself, and why parents let it get out of hand to this point.

its because of the OTHER kids. I already posted about kids on yikyak slamming sororities for various reasons. You read that and then you don't want to tell your friends, "Hey I just pledged XYZ sorority, you know the one with the fat girls everyone is ragging on?". If the stupid kids would stop demanding others on social media, then it would all be much better. I dunno, you guys raised these kids, I don't know what kind of awful parenting has to take place for these kids to put others down so publicly, but so many of your here on DCUM, here on THIS very thread, do the same so I guess we see where it comes from.

Fair point but as others have noted, kids have always demeaned and ranked sororities. Like everything else, it’s just much worse now with social media

sorry stop DEMEANING others.. bad typing this Am

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Good luck to any of you who have girls going into pref today. I know it's probably been a stressful week for the girls and there are probably tears this morning. The Friday cuts are the worst at the higher ranked sororities especially because girls felt that they had a shot still if they were there for house tours. My dd had her painful cuts earlier in the week but had many friends who were devastated on pref day. It all worked out though, even if they didn't get their top choices from earlier in the week, they all seem happy where they ended up.

“Devastated” on pref day?

Dear lord. Reality check please.

You have never really wanted something and it didn’t happen? These are 18 and 19 year olds.

Have you always been so callous or is this a learned character defect?

That’s right. And 18-19 years old is about the time most of us start to realize that our perception of ourselves is not necessarily how the rest of the world views us. It’s a wake up and grow up moment.

I would question why membership in a certain sorority is of such consequence to a girls perception of herself, and why parents let it get out of hand to this point.

its because of the OTHER kids. I already posted about kids on yikyak slamming sororities for various reasons. You read that and then you don't want to tell your friends, "Hey I just pledged XYZ sorority, you know the one with the fat girls everyone is ragging on?". If the stupid kids would stop demanding others on social media, then it would all be much better. I dunno, you guys raised these kids, I don't know what kind of awful parenting has to take place for these kids to put others down so publicly, but so many of your here on DCUM, here on THIS very thread, do the same so I guess we see where it comes from.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Good luck to any of you who have girls going into pref today. I know it's probably been a stressful week for the girls and there are probably tears this morning. The Friday cuts are the worst at the higher ranked sororities especially because girls felt that they had a shot still if they were there for house tours. My dd had her painful cuts earlier in the week but had many friends who were devastated on pref day. It all worked out though, even if they didn't get their top choices from earlier in the week, they all seem happy where they ended up.

“Devastated” on pref day?

Dear lord. Reality check please.

You have never really wanted something and it didn’t happen? These are 18 and 19 year olds.

Have you always been so callous or is this a learned character defect?

+1 not to mention, this is UVA we're talking about. ALot of these kids have always come out on top, so to see that they are not "on top" at UVA, they are just run of the mill here, that's a wake up call. I personally think it's a wake up call that is needed, but still it's very hard. These are still teenagers you realize.

My kid was not devastated but she was bummed. She likes her sorority ok, has met alot of great friends and is on the executive board now. She hated rush then and she hates rush now on the other side. She has she been humbled at UVA in many ways. For better or worse. It can be a tough pill to swallow for many.

It was just as bad back in the late 80’s with rush at my Big 10. Granted, no social media but there was the same social hierarchy of frats and sororities. Devastating to go through a month of parties and then wind up not pledging. People shouldn’t belittle those who are disappointed by the experience.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OOS kids don’t want greek?? Lol

According to the FB post that started this thread, no one from out of state/country gets into any fraternities or sororities at UVA.

Is that true?!?

Actually, the opposite is true. The vast majority of the people in the "top frats/sororities" are from the northeast. Boarding schools usually. if you are just your average UVA student from NoVA, you're not getting into the "top". There is a Richmond area private school that apparently sends a bunch but up here in NoVa? You're just going to be "mid". Who cares though because there are over 30 fraternities and 14 sororities, there are plenty of places.

The person who posted on the parent's board was specifically complaining that he didn't get into a "top frat" because he's an international student. And that in state kid have a leg up, which is not true AT all. Others rightfully pointed out that she posted this with 10 days left in the rush so how could her son possibly know who they kept and if they were international or diverse?

This is so true and can be a rude awakening for some of these young women. It sort of soured my first two years at UVA, but in hindsight, it was a blessing to be shut out of the system. Social life at UVA can be really tough, particularly kids who go in thinking they have a shot at this quintessential college/Greek experience, but don’t have rhe right background or connections.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Good luck to any of you who have girls going into pref today. I know it's probably been a stressful week for the girls and there are probably tears this morning. The Friday cuts are the worst at the higher ranked sororities especially because girls felt that they had a shot still if they were there for house tours. My dd had her painful cuts earlier in the week but had many friends who were devastated on pref day. It all worked out though, even if they didn't get their top choices from earlier in the week, they all seem happy where they ended up.

“Devastated” on pref day?

Dear lord. Reality check please.

You have never really wanted something and it didn’t happen? These are 18 and 19 year olds.

Have you always been so callous or is this a learned character defect?

That’s right. And 18-19 years old is about the time most of us start to realize that our perception of ourselves is not necessarily how the rest of the world views us. It’s a wake up and grow up moment.

I would question why membership in a certain sorority is of such consequence to a girls perception of herself, and why parents let it get out of hand to this point.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Good luck to any of you who have girls going into pref today. I know it's probably been a stressful week for the girls and there are probably tears this morning. The Friday cuts are the worst at the higher ranked sororities especially because girls felt that they had a shot still if they were there for house tours. My dd had her painful cuts earlier in the week but had many friends who were devastated on pref day. It all worked out though, even if they didn't get their top choices from earlier in the week, they all seem happy where they ended up.

“Devastated” on pref day?

Dear lord. Reality check please.

You have never really wanted something and it didn’t happen? These are 18 and 19 year olds.

Have you always been so callous or is this a learned character defect?

Anonymous wrote:Good luck to any of you who have girls going into pref today. I know it's probably been a stressful week for the girls and there are probably tears this morning. The Friday cuts are the worst at the higher ranked sororities especially because girls felt that they had a shot still if they were there for house tours. My dd had her painful cuts earlier in the week but had many friends who were devastated on pref day. It all worked out though, even if they didn't get their top choices from earlier in the week, they all seem happy where they ended up.

“Devastated” on pref day?

Dear lord. Reality check please.

Good luck to any of you who have girls going into pref today. I know it's probably been a stressful week for the girls and there are probably tears this morning. The Friday cuts are the worst at the higher ranked sororities especially because girls felt that they had a shot still if they were there for house tours. My dd had her painful cuts earlier in the week but had many friends who were devastated on pref day. It all worked out though, even if they didn't get their top choices from earlier in the week, they all seem happy where they ended up.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OOS kids don’t want greek?? Lol

According to the FB post that started this thread, no one from out of state/country gets into any fraternities or sororities at UVA.

Is that true?!?

Actually, the opposite is true. The vast majority of the people in the "top frats/sororities" are from the northeast. Boarding schools usually. if you are just your average UVA student from NoVA, you're not getting into the "top". There is a Richmond area private school that apparently sends a bunch but up here in NoVa? You're just going to be "mid". Who cares though because there are over 30 fraternities and 14 sororities, there are plenty of places.

The person who posted on the parent's board was specifically complaining that he didn't get into a "top frat" because he's an international student. And that in state kid have a leg up, which is not true AT all. Others rightfully pointed out that she posted this with 10 days left in the rush so how could her son possibly know who they kept and if they were international or diverse?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But why are all of you speaking about tiers? It’s only matters if you make it matter otherwise it’s just some imagined social construct

Social construct yes. But very much real and not imagined. You clearly haven’t lived in this sort of environment and for that I consider you lucky.

+1
My DD who is in a sorority at uva said that kids are being absolutely awful on yikyak about rush. Saying that girls who join a particular sorority are all fat, etc. that another is all socially awkward or sluts etc, it’s brutal. So of course the PNM don’t want to go where they’d be made fun. It’s awful because every single sorority there has something great to offer. Tiers are real to the kids and they lead to frat relations and how you are perceived.

Yep. It’s like a microcosm of the status anxiety that is rampant on <checks notes> DCUM.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But why are all of you speaking about tiers? It’s only matters if you make it matter otherwise it’s just some imagined social construct

Social construct yes. But very much real and not imagined. You clearly haven’t lived in this sort of environment and for that I consider you lucky.

+1
My DD who is in a sorority at uva said that kids are being absolutely awful on yikyak about rush. Saying that girls who join a particular sorority are all fat, etc. that another is all socially awkward or sluts etc, it’s brutal. So of course the PNM don’t want to go where they’d be made fun. It’s awful because every single sorority there has something great to offer. Tiers are real to the kids and they lead to frat relations and how you are perceived.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The smartest kids of all are those who don't rush in the first place and find other things to do with their time.

Sorry you didn’t get a bid.

Considering I chose a school deliberately with no Greek system, that's a-ok with me! My own kid is smart enough not to bother with rush at their school. Sorry yours isn't.

No
No one is impressed with your lame bragging. Tearing down others isn’t nice. Or weren’t you taught that? No one here is saying you and your child are weird, losers are they? Be better.

PP is just wildly insecure. Probably a loser then and an in life.