Anonymous wrote:I have a cousin who currently sends her older child to boarding school in the US. My cousin and her family live in a different country. She wants to send her younger child in the US but due to the economy and exchange rates, they cannot afford to send both kids to boarding school in the US. She asked if the younger child could stay with us and go to school.

I already have 3 kids and it a struggle daily to wake them up and I feel like we barely get to school. Same for the afternoons. We have constant conflicts and it is difficult to feed and drive my own 3 kids.

Would you take in a cousin?

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Just say no

Though I know how pushy some can be. My DH and I were having some infertility issues and a cousin of his in India asked if we wanted to adopt his 10yo and 8 yo seeing as we were having trouble. (!!!!)

A lot of family members chimed in that they thought it was the perfect solution to everything. I was shocked at what they were suggesting.

If they were struggling to raise the kids, its actually a pretty common thing to do.

Yes, that's what they were thinking. But the infertility roller coaster was hard enough.

No way were we adopting kids whose parents were still alive and they weren't in an abusive situation.

With private adoption that’s how it works. Parents alive, kids not abused.

You ever had infertility? You have to bury that dream before you think of moving on to adoption. And honestly, we wanted "our baby" not some kids who wanted a chance at better schooling but would still have parents expecting a say in their lives (I know these cousins, they would absolutely expect input.) This would be adoption in name only as I realized at the time.

Hopefully your infertility did not resolve and you never got “your baby” because you sound a-w-f-u-l

PP you're the one who is profoundly awful. You can't handle someone being frank about their desire for a biological child and you have the ugly gall to wish them ill for being blunt and honest. You need therapy to explore why you are so knee-jerk judgemental but you'll probably never get that help, because you likely are too arrogant to understand why your post above is the absolute nadir of posts on DCUM.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just say no

Though I know how pushy some can be. My DH and I were having some infertility issues and a cousin of his in India asked if we wanted to adopt his 10yo and 8 yo seeing as we were having trouble. (!!!!)

A lot of family members chimed in that they thought it was the perfect solution to everything. I was shocked at what they were suggesting.

If they were struggling to raise the kids, its actually a pretty common thing to do.

Yes, that's what they were thinking. But the infertility roller coaster was hard enough.

No way were we adopting kids whose parents were still alive and they weren't in an abusive situation.

With private adoption that’s how it works. Parents alive, kids not abused.

You ever had infertility? You have to bury that dream before you think of moving on to adoption. And honestly, we wanted "our baby" not some kids who wanted a chance at better schooling but would still have parents expecting a say in their lives (I know these cousins, they would absolutely expect input.) This would be adoption in name only as I realized at the time.

Hopefully your infertility did not resolve and you never got “your baby” because you sound a-w-f-u-l

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our neighbors have about 10 adult “cousins” and 10 school aged minors from Guatemala all living together and attending public school. Go for it! Mi casa es tu casa.

This would qualify for the war zone/extreme danger exception.

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Anonymous wrote:No. And how would you even register the kid for school? They'd be here illegally. I had to provide birth certificates when I registered my kids.

You can legally come here as a student, you know. Kids do it all the time.

Public schools do not provide student visas. DUH.

Schools must enroll all children whose parent or guardians wish to enroll them if they live in the zoned boundary. They don't need to be US citizens. It is federal law.

https://www2.ed.gov/about/offices/list/ocr/docs/dcl-factsheet-201101.html

All children in the United States are entitled to a basic public elementary and secondary education regardless of their actual or perceived race, color, national origin, citizenship, immigration status, or the status of their parents/guardians. School districts that either prohibit or discourage, or maintain policies that have the effect of prohibiting or discouraging, children from enrolling in schools because they or their parents/guardians are not U.S. citizens or are undocumented may be in violation of Federal law.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just say no

Though I know how pushy some can be. My DH and I were having some infertility issues and a cousin of his in India asked if we wanted to adopt his 10yo and 8 yo seeing as we were having trouble. (!!!!)

A lot of family members chimed in that they thought it was the perfect solution to everything. I was shocked at what they were suggesting.

If they were struggling to raise the kids, its actually a pretty common thing to do.

Yes, that's what they were thinking. But the infertility roller coaster was hard enough.

No way were we adopting kids whose parents were still alive and they weren't in an abusive situation.

With private adoption that’s how it works. Parents alive, kids not abused.

You ever had infertility? You have to bury that dream before you think of moving on to adoption. And honestly, we wanted "our baby" not some kids who wanted a chance at better schooling but would still have parents expecting a say in their lives (I know these cousins, they would absolutely expect input.) This would be adoption in name only as I realized at the time.

Hopefully your infertility did not resolve and you never got “your baby” because you sound a-w-f-u-l

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just say no

Though I know how pushy some can be. My DH and I were having some infertility issues and a cousin of his in India asked if we wanted to adopt his 10yo and 8 yo seeing as we were having trouble. (!!!!)

A lot of family members chimed in that they thought it was the perfect solution to everything. I was shocked at what they were suggesting.

If they were struggling to raise the kids, its actually a pretty common thing to do.

Yes, that's what they were thinking. But the infertility roller coaster was hard enough.

No way were we adopting kids whose parents were still alive and they weren't in an abusive situation.

With private adoption that’s how it works. Parents alive, kids not abused.

You ever had infertility? You have to bury that dream before you think of moving on to adoption. And honestly, we wanted "our baby" not some kids who wanted a chance at better schooling but would still have parents expecting a say in their lives (I know these cousins, they would absolutely expect input.) This would be adoption in name only as I realized at the time.

Hopefully your infertility did not resolve and you never got “your baby” because you sound a-w-f-u-l

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just say no

Though I know how pushy some can be. My DH and I were having some infertility issues and a cousin of his in India asked if we wanted to adopt his 10yo and 8 yo seeing as we were having trouble. (!!!!)

A lot of family members chimed in that they thought it was the perfect solution to everything. I was shocked at what they were suggesting.

If they were struggling to raise the kids, its actually a pretty common thing to do.

Yes, that's what they were thinking. But the infertility roller coaster was hard enough.

No way were we adopting kids whose parents were still alive and they weren't in an abusive situation.

With private adoption that’s how it works. Parents alive, kids not abused.

You ever had infertility? You have to bury that dream before you think of moving on to adoption. And honestly, we wanted "our baby" not some kids who wanted a chance at better schooling but would still have parents expecting a say in their lives (I know these cousins, they would absolutely expect input.) This would be adoption in name only as I realized at the time.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. And how would you even register the kid for school? They'd be here illegally. I had to provide birth certificates when I registered my kids.

You can legally come here as a student, you know. Kids do it all the time.

Public schools do not provide student visas. DUH.

High schools can, for 12 months. The school must be reimbursed for costs.

What?

Anonymous wrote:
Do they have US citizenship?
I had an F1 student visa, sponsored by the school. No public school will do this.

What do her kids have?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. And how would you even register the kid for school? They'd be here illegally. I had to provide birth certificates when I registered my kids.

You can legally come here as a student, you know. Kids do it all the time.

Public schools do not provide student visas. DUH.

Schools must enroll all children whose parent or guardians wish to enroll them if they live in the zoned boundary. They don't need to be US citizens. It is federal law.

https://www2.ed.gov/about/offices/list/ocr/docs/dcl-factsheet-201101.html

All children in the United States are entitled to a basic public elementary and secondary education regardless of their actual or perceived race, color, national origin, citizenship, immigration status, or the status of their parents/guardians. School districts that either prohibit or discourage, or maintain policies that have the effect of prohibiting or discouraging, children from enrolling in schools because they or their parents/guardians are not U.S. citizens or are undocumented may be in violation of Federal law.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just say no

Though I know how pushy some can be. My DH and I were having some infertility issues and a cousin of his in India asked if we wanted to adopt his 10yo and 8 yo seeing as we were having trouble. (!!!!)

A lot of family members chimed in that they thought it was the perfect solution to everything. I was shocked at what they were suggesting.

If they were struggling to raise the kids, its actually a pretty common thing to do.

Yes, that's what they were thinking. But the infertility roller coaster was hard enough.

No way were we adopting kids whose parents were still alive and they weren't in an abusive situation.

With private adoption that’s how it works. Parents alive, kids not abused.