Anonymous wrote:If kids go into the fridge or pantry without asking the first time I tell them "In this house, guests need to ask an adult who lives here if they want something to eat or drink."

The second time I tell them "Remember what I said about asking if you want something? If you continue to help yourself you won't be invited back."

If they do it again they're never welcome back. My kids know they have "school friends" who they can enjoy playing with at school but aren't welcome at our house because they won't follow rules. Thems the breaks. Actions have consequences.

Np. Two of my 11 year old son's friends are FREQUENTLY in our pantry and fridge without asking. I'm reluctant to say anything because I don't police my own kid's snacking - I'm lucky that he somehow self regulates. But I can't bring myself to tell the guest "Oh yeah, DS doesn't have to ask for snacks but YOU do." So, when I see these boys just opening up the cabinets and pulling out food, I just kinda cringe at the rudeness. (If I see them with something I don't want them eating I tell them). It's not that I don't want them eating the food, it's the weird bad manners that get to me.

I tell my son to please for the love of God ASK politely for snacks at his friends houses, never open up a cabinet or the fridge.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I actually think there is a pretty nasty tendency to classify kids here as "bad" or "rude" as though we hold kids to adult standards. If a kid doesn't t say thank you, he's not a bad kid. I see myself do it too, forming preferences for the super sweet and polite kids, but some just aren't like that because maybe they're more impulsive or forgetful or shy, and that doesn't make them bad. I think as adults we should be more cautious and forming opinions of kids.

Forgetting to say thank you is very different from “ I do t have to listen to you.”

Yep, very different things. I brought my kid and her friend to the pool, and I packed them the snack they requested and one for myself. The child decided she wanted my snack instead, took the bag, and started eating it. When I told her no, she laughed and ran away with it. That is RUDE.

OMG! That is soooo rude. I can't believe we parents have to deal with crap like this.

I've had my share of rude kids. These are older MS and HS kids. It's horrible.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I actually think there is a pretty nasty tendency to classify kids here as "bad" or "rude" as though we hold kids to adult standards. If a kid doesn't t say thank you, he's not a bad kid. I see myself do it too, forming preferences for the super sweet and polite kids, but some just aren't like that because maybe they're more impulsive or forgetful or shy, and that doesn't make them bad. I think as adults we should be more cautious and forming opinions of kids.

Forgetting to say thank you is very different from “ I do t have to listen to you.”

Yep, very different things. I brought my kid and her friend to the pool, and I packed them the snack they requested and one for myself. The child decided she wanted my snack instead, took the bag, and started eating it. When I told her no, she laughed and ran away with it. That is RUDE.

Anonymous wrote:I actually think there is a pretty nasty tendency to classify kids here as "bad" or "rude" as though we hold kids to adult standards. If a kid doesn't t say thank you, he's not a bad kid. I see myself do it too, forming preferences for the super sweet and polite kids, but some just aren't like that because maybe they're more impulsive or forgetful or shy, and that doesn't make them bad. I think as adults we should be more cautious and forming opinions of kids.

Forgetting to say thank you is very different from “ I do t have to listen to you.”

Anonymous wrote:Following up, I wonder how much of it is a class thing. Our kids attended a title one school in DC and we honestly never saw any kind of behavior like that. All of the kids were polite and respectful at all times.

I suspect what you are seeing is the result of over privileged children being spoiled. And I wonder if your own kids fall into the same category but you just can’t see it. It wouldn’t surprise me.

Meh. My kids attend a Title 1 school in MCPS. I volunteer a ton and the kids there are plenty rude. Sometimes it's a different type of rude, but rude kids come in all SES levels, and all races.

Sorry can’t read this whole thread but if anyone disrespects your house kick them out. Larla call your mom you need to go home now honey.

Have you seen how parents talk to each other on this site? Of course, they have rude kids