Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's so interesting to me that so many ppl are asking or saying that a kids social life will suffer. Don't kids live anywhere near their friends anymore?? Can't they see each other in person?

You clearly don't know that kids socialize in a very different way than we did 30 years ago.

I know that they socialize differently and I don't think it's all that great.

That's irrelevant. Their social life will suffer in HS if they have no way of communicating with their friends over the phone.

+1

Nearly all plans are made via text. If they don’t have a phone, how would their friends even reach them? Do you have a landline? Or expect their friends to call/text you and leave a message? There was a kid or two like that in middle school, but I just don’t see how this would work for a high schooler.

Beyond that, mine use their phones to check grades & get into Google classroom, etc. on the fly. They also use their phones for extracurriculars- for example, my freshman DS uses it for his sport- practice and game schedules are in an app (along with special instructions sometimes- “wear the blue jersey today” “meet in the weight room today instead of the field” “practice will end early today at 4:00”) and so on. These changes are often last minute and I don’t even know how he would find the info without a phone.

I also need them to have phones to keep in touch for rides etc from sports and other extracurriculars and outings. To attend sporting events at our school- like an high school football game for example- all (including kids/students attending) must purchase and show an electronic ticket. No alternative (this one surprised me). They wouldn’t even be able to attend a HS football game with friends, without a phone…

In high school, everything is setup assuming all kids have a phone. It is reality, whether we like it or not…

Anonymous wrote:OP how is their self-restraint on their school devices? How do they keep in touch with friends? Are you worried about content, or about their communication, or about not moderating their time?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look into getting a Gabb phone. It looks like a cell phone so the kids blend in with the crowd. But no apps, no internet. The phone can take picture/video, do group texts, keep a calendar, calculator and stream music/audio only. $25 per month basic plan.

https://gabb.com/

+1 look at Gabb or Pinwheel. I am also a wait until 8th person and we haven't gotten to high school, but from what I understand it gets pretty hard to not have something. You can start slowly dabbling in the social media as they grow in high school. Apparently some sports teams communicate via social media so it all gets more complicated.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter got her first phone, a Gabb phone, at 8th grade graduation and we signed a two-year contract. We said that she could get a smart phone at the end of that contract (June of sophomore year). Now, in Oct of her sophomore year, she is doing just fine thus far with the Gabb. I am glad that we bought her more time for that frontal lobe to mature and make good decisions and to navigate the transition to high school without its interference. She is a cross-country runner, has a 4.24 GPA, is active in our church community and some other extracurriculars, and has generally been allowed to develop her own interests and sense of self without undue influence from social media or peer pressure.

My daughter is a freshman in college. She was a varsity tennis player for 4 years in high school. She graduated with a 4.5 GPA. She held a part-time job from the time she was 16. She socialized with friends, went to Prom, belonged to clubs, read books, went to college out of state, and is well-liked by her peers and teachers. She's had an iphone since 6th grade.

See how anecdotes work?

Except my reply answered the OP’s question.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm an adult and I don't have a cell phone. It's totally doable, and frankly, I wish more adults were like this. Get your screen stuff done when you're in front of a computer and then go live your life!

If you ever want to go to a game at my kid's high school (like if your kid plays a sport and playing against our school, at our school) the only way for you to get in is buying tickets through the app. Literally, you can not just show up and hand over cash.
From going to my kid's games, it's my impression that many of the schools in this area are like that.
Would you really just tell your kid "Sorry, I won't be watching you play, ever?"

That’s horrible. Why does your school do that? I would definitely advocate for more ticket buying options.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter got her first phone, a Gabb phone, at 8th grade graduation and we signed a two-year contract. We said that she could get a smart phone at the end of that contract (June of sophomore year). Now, in Oct of her sophomore year, she is doing just fine thus far with the Gabb. I am glad that we bought her more time for that frontal lobe to mature and make good decisions and to navigate the transition to high school without its interference. She is a cross-country runner, has a 4.24 GPA, is active in our church community and some other extracurriculars, and has generally been allowed to develop her own interests and sense of self without undue influence from social media or peer pressure.

My daughter is a freshman in college. She was a varsity tennis player for 4 years in high school. She graduated with a 4.5 GPA. She held a part-time job from the time she was 16. She socialized with friends, went to Prom, belonged to clubs, read books, went to college out of state, and is well-liked by her peers and teachers. She's had an iphone since 6th grade.

See how anecdotes work?

Anonymous wrote:My daughter got her first phone, a Gabb phone, at 8th grade graduation and we signed a two-year contract. We said that she could get a smart phone at the end of that contract (June of sophomore year). Now, in Oct of her sophomore year, she is doing just fine thus far with the Gabb. I am glad that we bought her more time for that frontal lobe to mature and make good decisions and to navigate the transition to high school without its interference. She is a cross-country runner, has a 4.24 GPA, is active in our church community and some other extracurriculars, and has generally been allowed to develop her own interests and sense of self without undue influence from social media or peer pressure.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter got her first phone, a Gabb phone, at 8th grade graduation and we signed a two-year contract. We said that she could get a smart phone at the end of that contract (June of sophomore year). Now, in Oct of her sophomore year, she is doing just fine thus far with the Gabb. I am glad that we bought her more time for that frontal lobe to mature and make good decisions and to navigate the transition to high school without its interference. She is a cross-country runner, has a 4.24 GPA, is active in our church community and some other extracurriculars, and has generally been allowed to develop her own interests and sense of self without undue influence from social media or peer pressure.

You failed to mention she knows how yo make and keep friends her same age. That is a critical skill. You all are setting your kids up for isolation and anxiety. Unless they prefer to be smug like you.

Anonymous wrote:My daughter got her first phone, a Gabb phone, at 8th grade graduation and we signed a two-year contract. We said that she could get a smart phone at the end of that contract (June of sophomore year). Now, in Oct of her sophomore year, she is doing just fine thus far with the Gabb. I am glad that we bought her more time for that frontal lobe to mature and make good decisions and to navigate the transition to high school without its interference. She is a cross-country runner, has a 4.24 GPA, is active in our church community and some other extracurriculars, and has generally been allowed to develop her own interests and sense of self without undue influence from social media or peer pressure.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t get it. Most of my 9th graders official school activities use Instagram for all communications. By high school I can’t imagine a kid not having a smart phone.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you want to socially cripple your kids, good luck.

This is such a weird take. Kids nowadays literally cannot start a conversation with another person or look them in the eyes. They bring their devices out at wildly inappropriate times (11 year old brings an iPad to a friend’s birthday party wtf) and and speak in texting acronyms. I am not worried about my child being left out on TikTok, I am worried about them becoming a socially awkward person who has no idea how to interact with a real live human being.