Anonymous wrote:Pp just stop. Your dichotomous, oversimplified line of thinking is wrong. It’s not like a mom is like, oh I want an uncomplicated vaginal birth and that’s what I will get. Nature does not work that way! Some women (like you) want that and get it. But a lot of women want that and don’t get it. Planning a vaginal birth is no guarantee to avoid a traumatic birth or a C section. Plenty of women plan for a vaginal
Birth and end up with a difficult vaginal birth and complications, and they may end up having to give birth via emergency C section, episiotomy, forceps, vacuum, under general anesthesia, etc. regardless of their plan.
Birth trauma can be experienced by anyone, regardless of how the baby comes out or how you planned to deliver. All birth is a major medical event, even if you do have an uncomplicated vaginal birth, because the potential is there for things to go wrong at any point in the process. Yes, it’s a “natural” process, and yes, for many women the birth process is straightforward, but for many women it is not and things can quickly go from
a normal situation to a major emergency in a short amount of time - shoulder dystocia, postpartum hemorrhage, preeclampsia, etc. can come on very fast. Mother Nature can be quite cruel to women and babies. I mean, plenty of women in the developing world end up with obstetric fistula because their babies get stuck and they don’t have access to a C section. Then their babies die and they are injured, permanently, and often for life. I promise you those women would have given anything for the “major medical experience” of a C section. You’re oversimplifying a complex process which can have many different outcomes for people.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP here - thanks for all of this feedback. My OB said she would schedule a C-section if I want one. Curious to hear more from women who had planned c’s on recovery time, level of pain, complications, etc.
I am not wrapped up in the “v birth” badge of honor or “natural way,” really I just want the best long term outcome for my pelvic floor and sex life after delivery.
Then don’t nurse either. You sound incredibly selfish and not worthy of being a mother.
What is the matter with you?
OP, I can't add anything to the C-Section discussion (both of mine were vaginal deliveries) but FWIW, it is really good to see an expectant mom prioritize her own health and needs. I know I'm the best version of myself--mom, wife, friend--when I take care of myself.
Wanting to have a good sex life is not selfish. Indeed, I'd say its directly linked to having a fulfilling relationship with your husband...which will only benefit your kids![]()
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP here - thanks for all of this feedback. My OB said she would schedule a C-section if I want one. Curious to hear more from women who had planned c’s on recovery time, level of pain, complications, etc.
I am not wrapped up in the “v birth” badge of honor or “natural way,” really I just want the best long term outcome for my pelvic floor and sex life after delivery.
Me, me, me. I pity your child…
I had unmedicated vaginal deliveries (they went great for me; no negative side effects for me or the kids) and I absolutely made the decision to give birth that way for me — it seemed less scary and more comfortable *for me*. The baby will be fine either way except I guess for having the benefit of a less miserable mother if she’s able to have a less traumatizing birth. Obviously you can’t control the situation entirely — bad things can happen no matter what — but forcing/encouraging someone to go through a major medical experience they’re terrified of when there’s another option they’re less terrified of is stupid and introduced unnecessary trauma. One of the best moms I know had a scheduled c section and is still glad she went with than choice just as I’m glad I went with vaginal deliveries.
Anonymous wrote:Nature came up with a way to do this that is best for you and the baby. Why mess with it??
I don’t believe in using modern medicine unless absolutely necessary, because there are no free lunches in life. My best friend had C-sections and both of her kids have developmental issues. I believe here babies were taken out too early, and anyway it’s a rough way for a baby to enter the world.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP here - thanks for all of this feedback. My OB said she would schedule a C-section if I want one. Curious to hear more from women who had planned c’s on recovery time, level of pain, complications, etc.
I am not wrapped up in the “v birth” badge of honor or “natural way,” really I just want the best long term outcome for my pelvic floor and sex life after delivery.
Me, me, me. I pity your child…
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP here - thanks for all of this feedback. My OB said she would schedule a C-section if I want one. Curious to hear more from women who had planned c’s on recovery time, level of pain, complications, etc.
I am not wrapped up in the “v birth” badge of honor or “natural way,” really I just want the best long term outcome for my pelvic floor and sex life after delivery.
Then don’t nurse either. You sound incredibly selfish and not worthy of being a mother.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP here - thanks for all of this feedback. My OB said she would schedule a C-section if I want one. Curious to hear more from women who had planned c’s on recovery time, level of pain, complications, etc.
I am not wrapped up in the “v birth” badge of honor or “natural way,” really I just want the best long term outcome for my pelvic floor and sex life after delivery.
Me, me, me. I pity your child…
Anonymous wrote:I read that a large number of ob-gyns have planned c-sections when delivering their own kids, for the exact same reason your friend wants to.