To a certain extent maybe it depends on the school (what might have been done already for understanding) and whether you know the program but OP - the fact that DD wants you to go and you don't seem to indicate either of the former - it is that important.

I cannot imagine a parent who blows this off without prior context whether they already know all the teachers or something. We have 2 in MS and wish that we could both do the night for both kids but we will need to split 1 parent: 1 kid's back to school night.

I think parents who feel this way have something wrong with them. They are your kids. You do right by them - it means a lot to them when they do something for you and it means a lot to understand what they do for 8 hours a day every day!

I didn’t go and don’t feel bad about it. We already had a lengthy info night last spring with a tour and Q&A sessions, a night at the start of the year so DD could find all her classrooms and practice opening her locker, and emails from most of her teachers with all the info they would’ve shared during open house.

I went. What surprised me was how much the teachers wanted parents to be doing to check homework.

Anonymous wrote:I’m still going during the HS years. Perhaps your kids are good about telling you about their day, but I find it really helpful to meet all the teachers and make assessments as to their personalities and teaching styles. It helps me understand what my kids are experiencing and if they complain or are struggling it may shed light on why. It helps me ask them better questions about their day because

+1

I went last week for my 8th grader.
I remember it was somewhat crowded in 7th so I wasn't looking forward to it, but it was good.

So few parents came, so in some classes, it was the teacher and 3 parents. It was more of a conversation, which I appreciated.

OP, I know it’s over now… but just for perspective, I went last week for 8th grade. I didn’t hate it. I learned a few things about the teachers. I saw the classrooms. Was it important? I don’t know. My DS didn’t care if I went one way or another. But, in every class, all the seats were full. So, most parents attended. They probably didn’t love it or hate it either…

The thing that I always fall back on is what do you remember about your childhood? Most people remember the really good, the really bad and then just sentiments- how people made you feel. If I can go, I do. If I can’t, I don’t stress over it. I don’t make it a big deal but the sentiment my kids will remember is that I cared. There are literally no other events that my kid is involved in during middle school, so this was it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You learn a lot going through a version of their day. The teachers, the families in the class, how far they have to walk/when, the timing of lunch/gym compared to the rest of the day, so many nuances that can't even be described.

I can't imagine giving up the opportunity to have perspective and context (not to mention, ability to help/suggest solutions to issues) when my kid is telling me about their day.

Honestly I try not to judge parenting but this is pretty bad.

Your kids don’t tell you these things? You need to see them in person to understand?
My kids give me play by plays (usually). Knowing what the hallways look like or what time lunch is won’t make a difference.

To think a parent who didn't attend has the same level of understanding as one who did is delusional thinking.

Totally agree. Parents don’t wanna parent.

Lol. Do you actually have an older middle schooler? Back to school night is so irrelevant and has nothing to do with parenting. This isn’t second grade where you meet the teacher. You shuffle through like 8 classes for five minutes each and don’t actually meet the teacher. You listen to four minutes of babble that tells you nothing about the class and then you shuffle to another classroom and start over. Anyone who thinks that gives them a leg up on parenting or that they are helping their kid in any way by doing that is delusional.

I agree you can read the hand out. But please, OP, you go because it shows your child you are interested in their school. That is the #1 reason to go. It is for their self esteem.

No, I'm not going. I've already emailed directly with each teacher and will see them for PTC.

I always go, just to show my kid that school is important and that I care. But it is otherwise a stupid waste of time meeting that could have been an email. For 6th grade, sure, but after that, no. And don’t get me started on parents having to sign syllabi. So insulting.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You learn a lot going through a version of their day. The teachers, the families in the class, how far they have to walk/when, the timing of lunch/gym compared to the rest of the day, so many nuances that can't even be described.

I can't imagine giving up the opportunity to have perspective and context (not to mention, ability to help/suggest solutions to issues) when my kid is telling me about their day.

Honestly I try not to judge parenting but this is pretty bad.

Your kids don’t tell you these things? You need to see them in person to understand?
My kids give me play by plays (usually). Knowing what the hallways look like or what time lunch is won’t make a difference.

To think a parent who didn't attend has the same level of understanding as one who did is delusional thinking.

And to think that laying eyes on the teacher for 10 min and seeing the structure of the building gives you a one up is also delusional thinking.
And, of course, another reason to think you are doing it better than those of us who don’t go.

Not everyone considers parenting a competitive sport.

You should tell that to the posters making digs like “be a parent”, “you’re lazy”, or my favorite - “why even have kids.”

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You learn a lot going through a version of their day. The teachers, the families in the class, how far they have to walk/when, the timing of lunch/gym compared to the rest of the day, so many nuances that can't even be described.

I can't imagine giving up the opportunity to have perspective and context (not to mention, ability to help/suggest solutions to issues) when my kid is telling me about their day.

Honestly I try not to judge parenting but this is pretty bad.

Your kids don’t tell you these things? You need to see them in person to understand?
My kids give me play by plays (usually). Knowing what the hallways look like or what time lunch is won’t make a difference.

To think a parent who didn't attend has the same level of understanding as one who did is delusional thinking.

And to think that laying eyes on the teacher for 10 min and seeing the structure of the building gives you a one up is also delusional thinking.
And, of course, another reason to think you are doing it better than those of us who don’t go.

Not everyone considers parenting a competitive sport.

True. And not everyone is so lame as to have to wrestle with whether to attend a child’s MS open house or back to school night. Just insane.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You learn a lot going through a version of their day. The teachers, the families in the class, how far they have to walk/when, the timing of lunch/gym compared to the rest of the day, so many nuances that can't even be described.

I can't imagine giving up the opportunity to have perspective and context (not to mention, ability to help/suggest solutions to issues) when my kid is telling me about their day.

Honestly I try not to judge parenting but this is pretty bad.

Your kids don’t tell you these things? You need to see them in person to understand?
My kids give me play by plays (usually). Knowing what the hallways look like or what time lunch is won’t make a difference.

To think a parent who didn't attend has the same level of understanding as one who did is delusional thinking.

And to think that laying eyes on the teacher for 10 min and seeing the structure of the building gives you a one up is also delusional thinking.
And, of course, another reason to think you are doing it better than those of us who don’t go.

Not everyone considers parenting a competitive sport.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What a bunch of helicopters! You aren’t needed in your kid’s relationships with their teachers. You don’t need to see what the teacher is wearing and your opinion on whether or not the teacher is nice (like you can even tell in 10 minutes) isn’t of any value. Your kids can handle middle school without you seeing the desks.

Seriously. Yet they are patting themselves on the back for their superior parenting. It would be funny if it wasn’t so sad.

You rationalizing why you don't go is pretty sad too. Blame the other parents, that's the ticket!

Even sadder now that you’re doubling down.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You learn a lot going through a version of their day. The teachers, the families in the class, how far they have to walk/when, the timing of lunch/gym compared to the rest of the day, so many nuances that can't even be described.

I can't imagine giving up the opportunity to have perspective and context (not to mention, ability to help/suggest solutions to issues) when my kid is telling me about their day.

Honestly I try not to judge parenting but this is pretty bad.

Your kids don’t tell you these things? You need to see them in person to understand?
My kids give me play by plays (usually). Knowing what the hallways look like or what time lunch is won’t make a difference.

To think a parent who didn't attend has the same level of understanding as one who did is delusional thinking.

Totally agree. Parents don’t wanna parent.