I met my DH in college and started dating him at 21, we got engaged a year later. He is 8 years older, which I think moved commitment along. I let him lead (he asked me to be exclusive first, said I love you first, brought up marriage first). I was 26 when we had our first child and now we have three. I would say that women who want children should date for marriage in their early 20s when the dating pool is widest and look for men a decade older who have established careers (thus more inclined to want to start a family).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly don't think this is something people should be aiming for. I do not think people tend to make great life choices in their early 20s, and picking a partner for life is one of them.

No. Don't wait until after 30 to make finding your mate a "sort of" priority. Well, do that if you want to be 40 alone with three cats. Land him in your prime. Your 20s.

A lot of women make it a priority in their 20s and still end up single or settling at 35.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ll answer this as a mom of a 24 y.o. man who is moving in with his girlfriend next month and basically views it as a trial run for marriage- you find a guy who is not afraid of commitment, who values marriage and who values you. You don’t get yourself into “situationships”, you let them know early on that you are dating to marry, and if you scare some off - excellent, these are the men you are trying to avoid anyway.

This is the opposite of commitment.

Why? He told me if things work out well, a proposal will be coming in a year.

i strongly discourage my 25 year old daughter from living with her boyfriend. If their constant togetherness and sleepovers aren’t enough of a trial run and he is uncertain, she should move on.

You’re wrong. Living together was a fantastic education for marriage.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ll answer this as a mom of a 24 y.o. man who is moving in with his girlfriend next month and basically views it as a trial run for marriage- you find a guy who is not afraid of commitment, who values marriage and who values you. You don’t get yourself into “situationships”, you let them know early on that you are dating to marry, and if you scare some off - excellent, these are the men you are trying to avoid anyway.

This is the opposite of commitment.

Why? He told me if things work out well, a proposal will be coming in a year.

i strongly discourage my 25 year old daughter from living with her boyfriend. If their constant togetherness and sleepovers aren’t enough of a trial run and he is uncertain, she should move on.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly don't think this is something people should be aiming for. I do not think people tend to make great life choices in their early 20s, and picking a partner for life is one of them.

No. Don't wait until after 30 to make finding your mate a "sort of" priority. Well, do that if you want to be 40 alone with three cats. Land him in your prime. Your 20s.

My prime was my 30s. Not my 20s.

My prime was my twenties but it would definitely have been my thirties had I not started having kids at age 26.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly don't think this is something people should be aiming for. I do not think people tend to make great life choices in their early 20s, and picking a partner for life is one of them.

No. Don't wait until after 30 to make finding your mate a "sort of" priority. Well, do that if you want to be 40 alone with three cats. Land him in your prime. Your 20s.

My prime was my 30s. Not my 20s.