Anonymous
Post 02/23/2023 05:40     Subject: Re:12yo still takes baths, not showers

Beyond hygiene concerns, is your daughter actually frightened of taking a shower? Are there perhaps sensory issues at work here? Not liking to get water sprayed in face/eyes?
Anonymous
Post 02/23/2023 05:01     Subject: 12yo still takes baths, not showers
Anonymous wrote:My 12yo (almost 13) DD takes baths every week. She says she doesn't like showers because they are "less relaxing". She loves bath bombs, uses them often, and sometimes will read on her waterproof Kindle in the bath. Is this weird? Her younger sister only takes showers. It came up when I was chatting with mom friends and a lot of them gave me a look when I mentioned it.

Do I force her to start taking showers or just let her be?



What? 1 bath a week? Daily showers or baths people this isn't france.
Anonymous
Post 02/22/2023 23:44     Subject: 12yo still takes baths, not showers
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My 12yo (almost 13) DD takes baths every week. She says she doesn't like showers because they are "less relaxing". She loves bath bombs, uses them often, and sometimes will read on her waterproof Kindle in the bath. Is this weird? Her younger sister only takes showers. It came up when I was chatting with mom friends and a lot of them gave me a look when I mentioned it.

Do I force her to start taking showers or just let her be?

Why is that weird? I'm 55 and often take baths.


It's weird because OP came back to say the kid doesn't wash just sits in the bath bomb water once a week and I guess (?!?) just uses conditioner in hair sometimes followed (????) by shampoo


Man, that’s crunchy..
Anonymous
Post 02/22/2023 22:25     Subject: 12yo still takes baths, not showers
I was 9 when I discovered what the tub faucet could do. Then I wanted to take a bath daily, if not multiple times per day. A hand held massage showerhead also offers powerful incentive.
Anonymous
Post 02/22/2023 12:45     Subject: Re:12yo still takes baths, not showers
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Op, please come back and explain how you got into a situation where your child is bathing only once per week.


Sure, I will. Do none of you have tweens with busy lives? I understand now from everyone's responses that this isn't okay, but how do you squeeze in multiple baths/showers a week with everything else going on?


Look OP, I get it. You might be a single mom jugging two jobs. You might be depressed. Your kid might be depressed. There are all kinds of reasons why this can happen. But don't snark back at everyone like it's any kind of normal or healthy that an almost twelve year old in America doesn't know how to bathe.
Anonymous
Post 02/22/2023 12:31     Subject: Re:12yo still takes baths, not showers
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Op, please come back and explain how you got into a situation where your child is bathing only once per week.


Sure, I will. Do none of you have tweens with busy lives? I understand now from everyone's responses that this isn't okay, but how do you squeeze in multiple baths/showers a week with everything else going on?

OP you just find the time for them to shower! Is it a first thing in the day shower? Is it a post school and activities evening shower? Whatever works for your family! Just make sure it happens.
We adults shower in the morning and the children shower before bed, it’s just upstairs, shower on, get in, wash, rinse, get out. You will figure out the right time and just encourage her to find the time that works for her daily and save that special bath time for once in awhile perhaps!


I have 2 kids we very busy sports/activity schedules….they have something every day after school or evening plus homework. Showers are just built in to their evening schedules….it has just become part of the routine
Anonymous
Post 02/22/2023 12:22     Subject: Re:12yo still takes baths, not showers
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Op, please come back and explain how you got into a situation where your child is bathing only once per week.


Sure, I will. Do none of you have tweens with busy lives? I understand now from everyone's responses that this isn't okay, but how do you squeeze in multiple baths/showers a week with everything else going on?


There is probably no one on DCUM, whose children do not have busy lives. Your child has to suck it up and shower on days when she's short on time. It shouldn't take longer than 10-15 minutes. Make it a part of her daily/nightly routine.
Anonymous
Post 02/22/2023 10:29     Subject: Re:12yo still takes baths, not showers
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I'm on the crunchier side and I think it's fine (and better for the planet) not to shower every day if you don't smell, but once a week isn't often enough. My 11 and 13 year old daughters shower every second or third day. The younger one is stinkier than the older one so it has to be more of a priority for her. Also my daughters know they can take quick showers without washing their hair (I only wash my hair once every 5-7 days).

OP, I would introduce the idea of showering in between baths.



This is too crunchy


By what measure? If a person isn't smelly or oily, what's the problem?

I don't know if it's age or using a better shampoo, or maybe just adjusting to my schedule, but my hair doesn't get oily until it's been at least a week since I washed it. It used to get oily around day 4.
Anonymous
Post 02/22/2023 10:14     Subject: Re:12yo still takes baths, not showers
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I'm on the crunchier side and I think it's fine (and better for the planet) not to shower every day if you don't smell, but once a week isn't often enough. My 11 and 13 year old daughters shower every second or third day. The younger one is stinkier than the older one so it has to be more of a priority for her. Also my daughters know they can take quick showers without washing their hair (I only wash my hair once every 5-7 days).

OP, I would introduce the idea of showering in between baths.



This is too crunchy


Oh, please. DCUM is weirdly germophobic and hygiene-obsessed. Once a week is not enough, but much of the world does not bathe every day, and it's fine.
Anonymous
Post 02/22/2023 10:14     Subject: 12yo still takes baths, not showers
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My 12yo (almost 13) DD takes baths every week. She says she doesn't like showers because they are "less relaxing". She loves bath bombs, uses them often, and sometimes will read on her waterproof Kindle in the bath. Is this weird? Her younger sister only takes showers. It came up when I was chatting with mom friends and a lot of them gave me a look when I mentioned it.

Do I force her to start taking showers or just let her be?

Why is that weird? I'm 55 and often take baths.


It's weird because OP came back to say the kid doesn't wash just sits in the bath bomb water once a week and I guess (?!?) just uses conditioner in hair sometimes followed (????) by shampoo
Anonymous
Post 02/22/2023 10:11     Subject: 12yo still takes baths, not showers
Anonymous wrote:My 12yo (almost 13) DD takes baths every week. She says she doesn't like showers because they are "less relaxing". She loves bath bombs, uses them often, and sometimes will read on her waterproof Kindle in the bath. Is this weird? Her younger sister only takes showers. It came up when I was chatting with mom friends and a lot of them gave me a look when I mentioned it.

Do I force her to start taking showers or just let her be?

Why is that weird? I'm 55 and often take baths.
Anonymous
Post 02/22/2023 10:10     Subject: Re:12yo still takes baths, not showers
Anonymous wrote:I'm on the crunchier side and I think it's fine (and better for the planet) not to shower every day if you don't smell, but once a week isn't often enough. My 11 and 13 year old daughters shower every second or third day. The younger one is stinkier than the older one so it has to be more of a priority for her. Also my daughters know they can take quick showers without washing their hair (I only wash my hair once every 5-7 days).

OP, I would introduce the idea of showering in between baths.



This is too crunchy
Anonymous
Post 02/22/2023 09:06     Subject: Re:12yo still takes baths, not showers
I'm on the crunchier side and I think it's fine (and better for the planet) not to shower every day if you don't smell, but once a week isn't often enough. My 11 and 13 year old daughters shower every second or third day. The younger one is stinkier than the older one so it has to be more of a priority for her. Also my daughters know they can take quick showers without washing their hair (I only wash my hair once every 5-7 days).

OP, I would introduce the idea of showering in between baths.

Anonymous
Post 02/22/2023 08:59     Subject: Re:12yo still takes baths, not showers
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Op, please come back and explain how you got into a situation where your child is bathing only once per week.


Sure, I will. Do none of you have tweens with busy lives? I understand now from everyone's responses that this isn't okay, but how do you squeeze in multiple baths/showers a week with everything else going on?


This has to be a troll.
Anonymous
Post 02/22/2023 08:58     Subject: 12yo still takes baths, not showers
My 11 year old DS used to shower a couple times a week, and always after a sports activity. Several months ago he decided on his own that he'd shower every night before bed. It's part of his routine now. OP, you just have to ingrain it into her routine.