I like Chinese food but if I made a whole turkey and brought it to a relative's house and they put it away for themselves for later and served Chinese Food instead I'd probably be upset about it.

I would tell the parents in advance, and ask them to not bother cooking for you if you don't want to serve their food.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Take out Chinese food is for Christmas Eve , not Thanksgiving.

That seems pretty obvious

There are no rules about what to eat on any day, including holidays.

That seems pretty obvious.

+1

There may not be rules, but there are expectations. And if I were invited to Thanksgiving dinner and got Chinese instead of turkey and trimmings, I'd be upset. Mainly because I don't like Chinese cuisine, and I love traditional Thanksgiving dinner. OP, do your guests enjoy Chinese food? If so, let them know now so they aren't expecting the turkey et. al. (and I especially love your husbands plan to accept your Mom's turkey and then serve it to himself when she isn't there).

You’d be upset if someone invited you over and didn’t feed you way at you wanted? You sound very entitled, or at least high maintenance.

No. I'd be upset if someone invited me over for a specific meal that I love and then didn't serve that meal, and on top of that served something I hate. That is not the same as inviting me for <nonspecified> dinner and serving me something I don't like. In that case I would eat what I could and be grateful that they fed me. Do you often have trouble understanding nuances?

I don’t, Karen.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Take out Chinese food is for Christmas Eve , not Thanksgiving.

That seems pretty obvious

There are no rules about what to eat on any day, including holidays.

That seems pretty obvious.

+1

There may not be rules, but there are expectations. And if I were invited to Thanksgiving dinner and got Chinese instead of turkey and trimmings, I'd be upset. Mainly because I don't like Chinese cuisine, and I love traditional Thanksgiving dinner. OP, do your guests enjoy Chinese food? If so, let them know now so they aren't expecting the turkey et. al. (and I especially love your husbands plan to accept your Mom's turkey and then serve it to himself when she isn't there).

You’d be upset if someone invited you over and didn’t feed you way at you wanted? You sound very entitled, or at least high maintenance.

No. I'd be upset if someone invited me over for a specific meal that I love and then didn't serve that meal, and on top of that served something I hate. That is not the same as inviting me for <nonspecified> dinner and serving me something I don't like. In that case I would eat what I could and be grateful that they fed me. Do you often have trouble understanding nuances?

“A specific meal that I love.” I think you’re the one with trouble understanding nuances. Unless someone provides a detailed menu and then switches it up, I don’t see how that’s possible. In which case if you had ordinary social skills, you’d still be grateful for the invitation and the company and wouldn’t actually like a sulky child because you didn’t get your pumpkin pie.

First world problems. Turkey isn't even great. How many times does everyone eat Turkey during the year.

Anonymous wrote:NYT barefoot contessa recipes from store bought. MIL bringing turkey. You go buy prepared mashed potatoes add in cream, garlic, Parmesan. Trader Joe’s has bags of them as well as sweet potatoes. Cranberry whole berry in can. Cook down and add orange, raisins. Box of stuffing. Pumpkin pie anywhere. Bag of salad. This seems pretty easy. You should be ok to pull off!

Good ideas. Trader Joes literally has everything except Turkey. TJ has all the thanksgiving sides. Buy 10 of them and I'm sure they likely taste better than your husbands. Put them on nice plates/serving platters after microwaving or heating up in the oven.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Take out Chinese food is for Christmas Eve , not Thanksgiving.

That seems pretty obvious

There are no rules about what to eat on any day, including holidays.

That seems pretty obvious.

+1

There may not be rules, but there are expectations. And if I were invited to Thanksgiving dinner and got Chinese instead of turkey and trimmings, I'd be upset. Mainly because I don't like Chinese cuisine, and I love traditional Thanksgiving dinner. OP, do your guests enjoy Chinese food? If so, let them know now so they aren't expecting the turkey et. al. (and I especially love your husbands plan to accept your Mom's turkey and then serve it to himself when she isn't there).

You’d be upset if someone invited you over and didn’t feed you way at you wanted? You sound very entitled, or at least high maintenance.

NP. Let’s not be obtuse. My mom usually hosts Thanksgiving for my family/local extended family, and she does turkey and trimmings—everyone brings a dish and helps out. If she unilaterally decided that—ta da, it was going to be Chinese takeout—people would be disappointed, because you can get Chinese any weekend, and Thanksgiving is once a year. My aunt or my sister or my brother and I would happily step up and host if my mom didn’t want to do it, even with only a few days’ notice.

Again, let’s not be obtuse. This is not a random dinner party in August. It’s Thanksgiving. I’m not saying only turkey and sides makes a Thanksgiving, I’m just saying if you significantly deviate from family norms with no notice, that’s gonna suck. I say this as someone whose favorite Thanksgiving food is my SIL’s musubi.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I tried this one year. They aren’t open on thanksgiving.

Who is “they”

They = Chinese takeout restaurants. Not a single one was open for thanksgiving the year I thought I’d do this.

Anonymous wrote:I would indulge this and go all out.

Get tons of Chinese food.

Go to the store tomorrow and get edamame, Fly by Jing sauces (Whole Foods), chili crisp, fortune cookies, maybe stop by a Chinese bakery. Go to World Market and get Chinese drinks. H-mart snacks. Have fun with it! It'll be 2 hours or errands for less work in the kitchen.

Make a green bean casserole with chow mien noodles and friend onions.

If your family, like mine, would be "sad" at no turkey, don't tell them. if they bring sides, put them in the mix, too. And then do it for Christmas if you must.

This sounds like just as much work as OP picking up prepared sides and roasting a turkey. She might as well just do traditional thanksgiving dinner and have DH order takeout if he wants.

Traditional all the way- with shortcuts!

For God’s sake just order everything. Let him order the Chinese food he wants and you can order prepared stuff for the rest. You should be able to get sides which you can reheat and they sell separate legs and breast which are easier to cook than a whole turkey.

Our family is traveling in 17 days so we are doing a low key dinner with just the two kids and parents. We only like dark meat so I ordered drumsticks which I will roast. It will only take 1.5 hrs at most. One kid only likes roasted potatoes and the other tater tots. None are into casseroles so not making any. I got some veggies that our family likes which I’ll make (eg , green beans, sweet potatoes and asparagus). My oldest only cares about corn and bread along with the drumstick and gravy. I’m the only one who likes cranberry sauce from the can which I bought. Really easy. And the best part is our friend made us two pumpkin pies for my husbands birthday right before Thanksgiving. He really knocked them out of the park this year. So I am really looking forward to the homemade pie. My youngest will eat his with ice cream. My oldest only likes vanilla bean ice cream which I bought yesterday. Done.

NYT barefoot contessa recipes from store bought. MIL bringing turkey. You go buy prepared mashed potatoes add in cream, garlic, Parmesan. Trader Joe’s has bags of them as well as sweet potatoes. Cranberry whole berry in can. Cook down and add orange, raisins. Box of stuffing. Pumpkin pie anywhere. Bag of salad. This seems pretty easy. You should be ok to pull off!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Take out Chinese food is for Christmas Eve , not Thanksgiving.

That seems pretty obvious

There are no rules about what to eat on any day, including holidays.

That seems pretty obvious.

+1

There may not be rules, but there are expectations. And if I were invited to Thanksgiving dinner and got Chinese instead of turkey and trimmings, I'd be upset. Mainly because I don't like Chinese cuisine, and I love traditional Thanksgiving dinner. OP, do your guests enjoy Chinese food? If so, let them know now so they aren't expecting the turkey et. al. (and I especially love your husbands plan to accept your Mom's turkey and then serve it to himself when she isn't there).

You’d be upset if someone invited you over and didn’t feed you way at you wanted? You sound very entitled, or at least high maintenance.

No. I'd be upset if someone invited me over for a specific meal that I love and then didn't serve that meal, and on top of that served something I hate. That is not the same as inviting me for <nonspecified> dinner and serving me something I don't like. In that case I would eat what I could and be grateful that they fed me. Do you often have trouble understanding nuances?

Chinese is for Christmas, Thai is for Thanksgiving.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm the OP, I totally support him and am on board but I know each sets of parents will flip out. (And his mother bought and is bringing the turkey tomorrow, which DH says he can "do something" with over the weekend.) I am not looking forward to gripes from them, namely his mom saying how hard he works (which will be directed snidely at me as if it's my fault) while my dad complains and my mom tries to cover for everyone by deciding to cook herself even though she has glaucoma and can't see well...I just think the fallout will be bad.

Just tell everyone loudly that this is what your husband wanted, and that complaints and comments are not welcome.

Uh no, why don't you not throw your DH under the bus. Just call today and tell them what is happening, and reassure them that it will be perfect. Be the captain here OP. Don't let them freak out. You and DH can make turkey enchiladas on Friday. Or, see if you can find a turkey take out meal in the city and pick it up for everyone, if he's fine with that. Lot's of restaurants should be doing that. I really wouldn't be a martyr here.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Take out Chinese food is for Christmas Eve , not Thanksgiving.

That seems pretty obvious

There are no rules about what to eat on any day, including holidays.

That seems pretty obvious.

+1

There may not be rules, but there are expectations. And if I were invited to Thanksgiving dinner and got Chinese instead of turkey and trimmings, I'd be upset. Mainly because I don't like Chinese cuisine, and I love traditional Thanksgiving dinner. OP, do your guests enjoy Chinese food? If so, let them know now so they aren't expecting the turkey et. al. (and I especially love your husbands plan to accept your Mom's turkey and then serve it to himself when she isn't there).

You’d be upset if someone invited you over and didn’t feed you way at you wanted? You sound very entitled, or at least high maintenance.