Anonymous
06/28/2022 16:58
Subject: Nonreligious family sending child to religious school
OP, my children have been in various religious schools, and so was I as a child.
Absolutely do not send your children to a school that is a fundamentalist Protestant sect that thinks the earth is 6,500 years old, etc. BTDT as a kid, it was ridiculous and I KNEW it was wrong. I just felt my teachers were idiots.
My children have been to 3 different Catholic schools -- a parish school (too strict/teach to the test like public), a Montessori (taken over by nonreligious people and thus no real religious aspect remained, education was fine), and now they are attending a classical school.
I much prefer the classical school. The interweaving of traditional education is not about memorization, as some classical school critics want to suggest. Sure, they have spelling words like everyone else -- but the integrated curriculum weaving ideas from literature through science and math are really an exceptional, whole child way to learn. Like another PP, I also like that they move the children to what math group they fit in best with, not tied to grade level. They also learn Latin, which many think is not useful but as a philology minor, I think it is a wonderful base. They have 3 recesses a day so elementary boys are stuck in desks for hours.
The upside, too, is that the teachers are extremely overeducated. Most are Ph.D.s who did not get a tenure track job in theology. Many of the teachers are men, which is nice as I have sons and having male role models from a young age is good.
The downside is that if you are not at least on board with Catholic teaching, you aren't going to be very happy with the program. They have Mass first thing every morning. The school teaches in the Catholic faith. It is full of families of strong faith, not Easter and Christmas Catholics.
I myself am a Protestant, but my DH is Catholic and I would like my children to be strong Catholics. If you are uncomfortable with discussions about hard topics, probably not for you.
Absolutely do not send your children to a school that is a fundamentalist Protestant sect that thinks the earth is 6,500 years old, etc. BTDT as a kid, it was ridiculous and I KNEW it was wrong. I just felt my teachers were idiots.
My children have been to 3 different Catholic schools -- a parish school (too strict/teach to the test like public), a Montessori (taken over by nonreligious people and thus no real religious aspect remained, education was fine), and now they are attending a classical school.
I much prefer the classical school. The interweaving of traditional education is not about memorization, as some classical school critics want to suggest. Sure, they have spelling words like everyone else -- but the integrated curriculum weaving ideas from literature through science and math are really an exceptional, whole child way to learn. Like another PP, I also like that they move the children to what math group they fit in best with, not tied to grade level. They also learn Latin, which many think is not useful but as a philology minor, I think it is a wonderful base. They have 3 recesses a day so elementary boys are stuck in desks for hours.
The upside, too, is that the teachers are extremely overeducated. Most are Ph.D.s who did not get a tenure track job in theology. Many of the teachers are men, which is nice as I have sons and having male role models from a young age is good.
The downside is that if you are not at least on board with Catholic teaching, you aren't going to be very happy with the program. They have Mass first thing every morning. The school teaches in the Catholic faith. It is full of families of strong faith, not Easter and Christmas Catholics.
I myself am a Protestant, but my DH is Catholic and I would like my children to be strong Catholics. If you are uncomfortable with discussions about hard topics, probably not for you.
Anonymous
06/28/2022 16:43
Subject: Nonreligious family sending child to religious school
My father attended Catholic schools from Day 1. Every single year, he told us, the valedictorian was Jewish.
There were about a dozen Jewish kids in the lower school and high school . They were Jewish kids whose parents could not afford private but had no intention of putting their kids in public school.
There were about a dozen Jewish kids in the lower school and high school . They were Jewish kids whose parents could not afford private but had no intention of putting their kids in public school.
Anonymous
06/27/2022 21:48
Subject: Nonreligious family sending child to religious school
I think, in general, it is okay if the parents are okay with the kids possibly being more observant than they are. My parents are Catholic but there were things they didn't agree with. They were okay with birth control and abortion. My sister and I attended Catholic school and for many years, we were both anti-abortion. I've changed my mind but my sister still is for the most part. I have seen children be more religious than their parents when they attend religious school.
Anonymous
06/27/2022 13:43
Subject: Re:Nonreligious family sending child to religious school
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Once upon a time I would have said that it’s fine. My kids used to go to a Catholic school that welcomed children of different faiths. They switched schools this year to a school started by a bunch of homeschoolers and missionaries. I switched my kids because I liked the idea of a classical education, and I liked that my kids could skip a couple of grades in math if they tested into a higher class (something no other school was offering until 6th grade).
Anyway, everyone at the school is Catholic, and it’s been really nice for them to have prayer and mass and study of the virtues and of the saints as part of their daily curriculum. The kids elected to collect money and toiletries for the homeless in lieu of class parties this year. They talk about their place in the history of the world and where they fit into God’s plan. It’s really wonderful, and I didn’t realize what we were missing. If you aren’t willing to embrace Catholic teachings, then don’t send your children to Catholic school. There is no way to include everyone, so what ends up happening is the message gets watered down to almost nothing.
What school is this, if you don’t mind me asking…?
-Signed a Catholic school parent who is tired of parochial schools watering down their religious curriculums because non- believers decide they want an alternative to publics, slowly changing the culture of the school
Hard to believe that the nuns would stand for that!
Well, that's the thing--most Catholic schools no longer have nuns.
Anonymous
06/27/2022 10:32
Subject: Nonreligious family sending child to religious school
Agree PP's school sounds wonderful. Could you share the name?
Anonymous
06/27/2022 10:17
Subject: Re:Nonreligious family sending child to religious school
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Once upon a time I would have said that it’s fine. My kids used to go to a Catholic school that welcomed children of different faiths. They switched schools this year to a school started by a bunch of homeschoolers and missionaries. I switched my kids because I liked the idea of a classical education, and I liked that my kids could skip a couple of grades in math if they tested into a higher class (something no other school was offering until 6th grade).
Anyway, everyone at the school is Catholic, and it’s been really nice for them to have prayer and mass and study of the virtues and of the saints as part of their daily curriculum. The kids elected to collect money and toiletries for the homeless in lieu of class parties this year. They talk about their place in the history of the world and where they fit into God’s plan. It’s really wonderful, and I didn’t realize what we were missing. If you aren’t willing to embrace Catholic teachings, then don’t send your children to Catholic school. There is no way to include everyone, so what ends up happening is the message gets watered down to almost nothing.
What school is this, if you don’t mind me asking…?
-Signed a Catholic school parent who is tired of parochial schools watering down their religious curriculums because non- believers decide they want an alternative to publics, slowly changing the culture of the school
Hard to believe that the nuns would stand for that!
Anonymous
06/26/2022 20:41
Subject: Re:Nonreligious family sending child to religious school
Anonymous wrote:Once upon a time I would have said that it’s fine. My kids used to go to a Catholic school that welcomed children of different faiths. They switched schools this year to a school started by a bunch of homeschoolers and missionaries. I switched my kids because I liked the idea of a classical education, and I liked that my kids could skip a couple of grades in math if they tested into a higher class (something no other school was offering until 6th grade).
Anyway, everyone at the school is Catholic, and it’s been really nice for them to have prayer and mass and study of the virtues and of the saints as part of their daily curriculum. The kids elected to collect money and toiletries for the homeless in lieu of class parties this year. They talk about their place in the history of the world and where they fit into God’s plan. It’s really wonderful, and I didn’t realize what we were missing. If you aren’t willing to embrace Catholic teachings, then don’t send your children to Catholic school. There is no way to include everyone, so what ends up happening is the message gets watered down to almost nothing.
What school is this, if you don’t mind me asking…?
-Signed a Catholic school parent who is tired of parochial schools watering down their religious curriculums because non- believers decide they want an alternative to publics, slowly changing the culture of the school
Anonymous
06/14/2022 10:15
Subject: Nonreligious family sending child to religious school
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Op here after a long time. Sorry I haven't responded.
We decided and are going to try. A more accurate description is one of us is newly very religious and one of us isn't.
If it doesn't work, we'll know.... It's very new to us.
I'd be interested to hear more from the PP who wrote about a "missionary/homeschooler founded school" in more detail and how that's worked out for them....
Pp here with kids who go to a school with a lot of former homeschoolers and missionaries (and others) as teachers.
I started writing about why I love a classical education so much, but I’m not sure that’s what you are looking at, and Susan Bauer and The Well-Trained Mind forums do a better job than I would.
I will speak to my own experience with the religious aspect of the school and why I said not to send your child if you aren’t religious. I’m going to go off-topic for a second, but I’m circling back. When my son was in third grade, he was really interested in insects and bacteria. So, I sent him to a biology camp over the summer. He was so excited to go and look at pond scum and collect insects and meet a bunch of other kids who shared his interest. When he got there, he did collect pond scum and look at insects, but most of the kids were more or less forced there by there parents and actually being interested in biology wasn’t cool. So, while he did get to learn some things about insects, he didn’t learn as much as he wanted to, and he also learned that being too excited about it wasn’t socially acceptable.
I told that story to say that this is how religion was treated at my kids’ former Catholic school, and, I think, at most Catholic schools. The kids learn religion there, but not too much, and any child who is too prayerful or too excited about Catholicism faces social rejection.
At their current school, the kids are encouraged in faith and prayer. In the younger grades, they learn about Cathedral and monastery life and architecture and the lives of individual saints when they study the Middle Ages and the renaissance. In older grades, they start to discuss things about the nature of good and evil and why God allows evil to exist. My sixth grader has “dinner table” topics once a week or so. They also go to mass regularly and start the day with prayer. There is also just a shift in perspective that prayer is a good and helpful thing in your life rather than some boring chore that you have to perform.
There is also a real emphasis on charity and doing for others. The kids are asked for prayer intentions at the beginning of the week (“my grandmother is sick,” “my dog died,” and other kid worries), and whenever they are asked to do something they don’t want to do (homework, eat vegetables, etc.), they offer up the task or the sacrifice as a prayer for one of their classmates. Also, as I said, there were donation drives at the times there would normally be parties or teacher gifts. The kids still played and has parties, but instead of stuff for themselves, they have to others.
My kids’ overall experience has been that they are much less anxious. They are happier and they sleep better. They are less perfectionistic in their schoolwork and more interested in learning for the sake of learning. They seem to have a better sense that, while discipline is good and accomplishments are celebrated, their value as a human being isn’t related to what math group they are in or what grades they get on their report cards.
I wish I could have some more of this on my own as a parent, and I am so grateful that we have this school.
OP here. Thank you for your perspective!
Anonymous
06/13/2022 14:33
Subject: Nonreligious family sending child to religious school
Anonymous wrote:Op here after a long time. Sorry I haven't responded.
We decided and are going to try. A more accurate description is one of us is newly very religious and one of us isn't.
If it doesn't work, we'll know.... It's very new to us.
I'd be interested to hear more from the PP who wrote about a "missionary/homeschooler founded school" in more detail and how that's worked out for them....
Pp here with kids who go to a school with a lot of former homeschoolers and missionaries (and others) as teachers.
I started writing about why I love a classical education so much, but I’m not sure that’s what you are looking at, and Susan Bauer and The Well-Trained Mind forums do a better job than I would.
I will speak to my own experience with the religious aspect of the school and why I said not to send your child if you aren’t religious. I’m going to go off-topic for a second, but I’m circling back. When my son was in third grade, he was really interested in insects and bacteria. So, I sent him to a biology camp over the summer. He was so excited to go and look at pond scum and collect insects and meet a bunch of other kids who shared his interest. When he got there, he did collect pond scum and look at insects, but most of the kids were more or less forced there by there parents and actually being interested in biology wasn’t cool. So, while he did get to learn some things about insects, he didn’t learn as much as he wanted to, and he also learned that being too excited about it wasn’t socially acceptable.
I told that story to say that this is how religion was treated at my kids’ former Catholic school, and, I think, at most Catholic schools. The kids learn religion there, but not too much, and any child who is too prayerful or too excited about Catholicism faces social rejection.
At their current school, the kids are encouraged in faith and prayer. In the younger grades, they learn about Cathedral and monastery life and architecture and the lives of individual saints when they study the Middle Ages and the renaissance. In older grades, they start to discuss things about the nature of good and evil and why God allows evil to exist. My sixth grader has “dinner table” topics once a week or so. They also go to mass regularly and start the day with prayer. There is also just a shift in perspective that prayer is a good and helpful thing in your life rather than some boring chore that you have to perform.
There is also a real emphasis on charity and doing for others. The kids are asked for prayer intentions at the beginning of the week (“my grandmother is sick,” “my dog died,” and other kid worries), and whenever they are asked to do something they don’t want to do (homework, eat vegetables, etc.), they offer up the task or the sacrifice as a prayer for one of their classmates. Also, as I said, there were donation drives at the times there would normally be parties or teacher gifts. The kids still played and has parties, but instead of stuff for themselves, they have to others.
My kids’ overall experience has been that they are much less anxious. They are happier and they sleep better. They are less perfectionistic in their schoolwork and more interested in learning for the sake of learning. They seem to have a better sense that, while discipline is good and accomplishments are celebrated, their value as a human being isn’t related to what math group they are in or what grades they get on their report cards.
I wish I could have some more of this on my own as a parent, and I am so grateful that we have this school.
Anonymous
06/13/2022 08:58
Subject: Nonreligious family sending child to religious school
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Why would a non-religious family - esp an atheist - send children to a religious school?
Because it was all we could afford and the public elementary school was terrible.
I think this is a problem. Catholic schools are there to provide a Catholic education. In the cases of the parochial schools, they are supported by the parish, and the parish is vested in seeing the children learn and grow and be part of the community.
And then you have non Catholics want to send their kids there only because "it's better than public school and cheap" with no intentions of becoming part of the community--and in many cases outright criticizing the Church, it's beliefs, and it's practices. And you wonder why some aren't welcoming with open arms?
No one was criticizing the church or saying they have no right to teach Catholicism but ones we looked at were not welcoming or friendly, except one. Why even offer a tour if you don't want some people? The Catholic church schools sadly have a much better curriculum than the public so that was a huge factor for us. I have not issue with my kids learning about religion as history/past but they don't need to believe it. Some schools need outsiders in order to financially survive.
Catholic schools do not educate better than public fact especially in Stem
Try again
Catholic schools teach religion period who would put their kid in a Catholic school right now especially girls ?
Catholic Schools Continue to Academically Outperform Public Schools
The most recent national reading and mathematics assessment results show Catholic schools continue to stand out.
https://www.ncea.org/NCEA/How_We_Serve/News/Press_Releases/Catholic_Schools_Continue_to_Academically_Outperform_Public_Schools.aspx?WebsiteKey=60819b28-9432-4c46-a76a-a2e20ac11cfd
Catholic school students performed better than public school students on the High School Placement Test (HSPT), according to the testing service results.
Catholic Students Outperform Public Students in Technology and Engineering
A study by the National Assessment of Educational Progress found that 8th grade Catholic school students fared better than public-school students when they were presented with real-world scenarios involving technology and engineering challenges.
Catholic students score an average of 45 points higher on the math portion of the SAT, 43 points higher on the reading portion of the SAT, and 53 points higher on the writing portion of the SAT, according to the 2016 College Board Report.
Catholic school students in 8th grade perform 12 points higher in math, 20 points higher in reading, 14 points higher in technology and literacy, and 17 points higher in history, geography, and civics when compared to 8th graders in public schools, according to the National Assessment of Educational Progress (NAEP), better known as the Nation's Report Card.
Catholic school 12th-grade students score an average of 20 points higher in math and 26 points higher in reading, according to the report.
https://www.sjbsilverspring.org/about/academics/how-do-catholic-schools-compare/
Any stats on how other private schools do? Are some of them similar to or better than Catholic schools?
Anonymous
06/13/2022 08:57
Subject: Nonreligious family sending child to religious school
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Why would a non-religious family - esp an atheist - send children to a religious school?
Because it was all we could afford and the public elementary school was terrible.
I think this is a problem. Catholic schools are there to provide a Catholic education. In the cases of the parochial schools, they are supported by the parish, and the parish is vested in seeing the children learn and grow and be part of the community.
And then you have non Catholics want to send their kids there only because "it's better than public school and cheap" with no intentions of becoming part of the community--and in many cases outright criticizing the Church, it's beliefs, and it's practices. And you wonder why some aren't welcoming with open arms?
No one was criticizing the church or saying they have no right to teach Catholicism but ones we looked at were not welcoming or friendly, except one. Why even offer a tour if you don't want some people? The Catholic church schools sadly have a much better curriculum than the public so that was a huge factor for us. I have not issue with my kids learning about religion as history/past but they don't need to believe it. Some schools need outsiders in order to financially survive.
Catholic schools do not educate better than public fact especially in Stem
Try again
Catholic schools teach religion period who would put their kid in a Catholic school right now especially girls ?
Catholic Schools Continue to Academically Outperform Public Schools
The most recent national reading and mathematics assessment results show Catholic schools continue to stand out.
https://www.ncea.org/NCEA/How_We_Serve/News/Press_Releases/Catholic_Schools_Continue_to_Academically_Outperform_Public_Schools.aspx?WebsiteKey=60819b28-9432-4c46-a76a-a2e20ac11cfd
Catholic school students performed better than public school students on the High School Placement Test (HSPT), according to the testing service results.
Catholic Students Outperform Public Students in Technology and Engineering
A study by the National Assessment of Educational Progress found that 8th grade Catholic school students fared better than public-school students when they were presented with real-world scenarios involving technology and engineering challenges.
Catholic students score an average of 45 points higher on the math portion of the SAT, 43 points higher on the reading portion of the SAT, and 53 points higher on the writing portion of the SAT, according to the 2016 College Board Report.
Catholic school students in 8th grade perform 12 points higher in math, 20 points higher in reading, 14 points higher in technology and literacy, and 17 points higher in history, geography, and civics when compared to 8th graders in public schools, according to the National Assessment of Educational Progress (NAEP), better known as the Nation's Report Card.
Catholic school 12th-grade students score an average of 20 points higher in math and 26 points higher in reading, according to the report.
https://www.sjbsilverspring.org/about/academics/how-do-catholic-schools-compare/
Any stats on how other private schools do? Are some of them similar to or better than Catholic schools?
Anonymous
06/12/2022 14:39
Subject: Nonreligious family sending child to religious school
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Why would a non-religious family - esp an atheist - send children to a religious school?
Because it was all we could afford and the public elementary school was terrible.
I think this is a problem. Catholic schools are there to provide a Catholic education. In the cases of the parochial schools, they are supported by the parish, and the parish is vested in seeing the children learn and grow and be part of the community.
And then you have non Catholics want to send their kids there only because "it's better than public school and cheap" with no intentions of becoming part of the community--and in many cases outright criticizing the Church, it's beliefs, and it's practices. And you wonder why some aren't welcoming with open arms?
No one was criticizing the church or saying they have no right to teach Catholicism but ones we looked at were not welcoming or friendly, except one. Why even offer a tour if you don't want some people? The Catholic church schools sadly have a much better curriculum than the public so that was a huge factor for us. I have not issue with my kids learning about religion as history/past but they don't need to believe it. Some schools need outsiders in order to financially survive.
Catholic schools do not educate better than public fact especially in Stem
Try again
Catholic schools teach religion period who would put their kid in a Catholic school right now especially girls ?
Catholic Schools Continue to Academically Outperform Public Schools
The most recent national reading and mathematics assessment results show Catholic schools continue to stand out.
https://www.ncea.org/NCEA/How_We_Serve/News/Press_Releases/Catholic_Schools_Continue_to_Academically_Outperform_Public_Schools.aspx?WebsiteKey=60819b28-9432-4c46-a76a-a2e20ac11cfd
Catholic school students performed better than public school students on the High School Placement Test (HSPT), according to the testing service results.
Catholic Students Outperform Public Students in Technology and Engineering
A study by the National Assessment of Educational Progress found that 8th grade Catholic school students fared better than public-school students when they were presented with real-world scenarios involving technology and engineering challenges.
Catholic students score an average of 45 points higher on the math portion of the SAT, 43 points higher on the reading portion of the SAT, and 53 points higher on the writing portion of the SAT, according to the 2016 College Board Report.
Catholic school students in 8th grade perform 12 points higher in math, 20 points higher in reading, 14 points higher in technology and literacy, and 17 points higher in history, geography, and civics when compared to 8th graders in public schools, according to the National Assessment of Educational Progress (NAEP), better known as the Nation's Report Card.
Catholic school 12th-grade students score an average of 20 points higher in math and 26 points higher in reading, according to the report.
https://www.sjbsilverspring.org/about/academics/how-do-catholic-schools-compare/
Anonymous
06/12/2022 11:10
Subject: Nonreligious family sending child to religious school
Op here after a long time. Sorry I haven't responded.
We decided and are going to try. A more accurate description is one of us is newly very religious and one of us isn't.
If it doesn't work, we'll know.... It's very new to us.
I'd be interested to hear more from the PP who wrote about a "missionary/homeschooler founded school" in more detail and how that's worked out for them....
We decided and are going to try. A more accurate description is one of us is newly very religious and one of us isn't.
If it doesn't work, we'll know.... It's very new to us.
I'd be interested to hear more from the PP who wrote about a "missionary/homeschooler founded school" in more detail and how that's worked out for them....
Anonymous
06/07/2022 13:32
Subject: Re:Nonreligious family sending child to religious school
If you send your child to a religious school, they should pray, learn the basic tenants of that faith, attend services, and participate in the rituals of that faith. If they aren’t doing those things, then they aren’t really a religious school, and it’s likely that the administration either has no plan for the direction of the school or is unable to stand up to parents. Either way, there is no real plan or confidence in what they are teaching.
If you aren’t comfortable with your child learning about religion or participating in religious activities, then don’t send them to a religious school.
If you aren’t comfortable with your child learning about religion or participating in religious activities, then don’t send them to a religious school.
Anonymous
06/07/2022 08:10
Subject: Re:Nonreligious family sending child to religious school
It depends on the religion and how it’s taught. We were not happy at a Catholic school. One example of values that differed from ours was when my kid came home and told us being gay was a sin. He claimed his religion teacher told the class that. Other than this, the school felt too religious for our comfort. We’ve transferred to an Episcopal school and it is a much better fit for our family. There is religion, but it’s more values based. We have families of all different faiths and the school tries to cater to the diverse group.