Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know, OP. It could be him/her, or it could be you. I am extremely wary of women who dislike their partner’s daughters.

My mother died when I was a teen. My dad threw himself into dating, and would take the advice and modify his lifestyle to suit each new woman. Many of them seemed to view me as competition, some kind of useless leech about whom they needed to “show” my dad the truth.

Here are some things my dad’s girlfriends viewed as “bratty”, “clingy”, and generally unreasonable:

1. Wanting to be allowed to have a high school graduation party (small, just a few friends, and we were studious, well-behaved kids) at home.

2. Asking my dad for a bottle of perfume for my 17th birthday (my dad was financially comfortable and the perfume was expensive for perfume; my dad’s girlfriend ranted and raved about how a girl my age had no business with something like that, and SHE was happy with the Body Shop when she was my age. Also, this was months after my mom’s death).

3. Wanting my dad to come to my college graduation. He didn’t, finally, because she “needed” him to help her pick out a new car.

4. Asking if I could live at home until I had saved a down payment for an apartment. This would have taken a few months because I had a job lined up after graduation. The answer was ultimately no.

5. Asking my dad to LEND me a down payment for my first apartment right after college. I had a job lined up but nowhere to go from the dorms and no money for a down payment. He ultimately refused, after much talk with his girlfriend who said I needed to “learn to make it” on my own. The story of how I lived for a few months until I got a down payment makes me so angry for my 22 year old self.

Sorry, but I have learned that women are naturally distrustful of a partner’s daughter, and they never, ever view the partner’s daughter they way they would their own child.

This is called projecting. See a therapist. She was absolutely correct about #2 and #5. . And your dad agreed to these things. His choice he was a grown man. So you should be mad at him too.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I was 21, I had a boyfriend who would help me for everything. I had a college roommate who didn’t have a boyfriend. She also relied on her parents a lot but they lived in a different country. I clearly remember the mom telling her it was ok to rely on them and not to rely on a boyfriend. I remember feeling offended at the time. Now that I have a daughter, I absolutely 100% would rather her call me or Dh for help for anything.

21 is college age. He is allowed to be there for his daughter if she needs him.

21 one is adult for most people a year from graduation . If by that stage in life you can't figure out dental appointments how to replace lost books without calling in your parents or a boyfriend your parents have failed you. Good parenting is not about doing everything for and making everything easy for your kids. This learned helplessness is making people anxious and depressed.

Anonymous wrote:When I was 21, I had a boyfriend who would help me for everything. I had a college roommate who didn’t have a boyfriend. She also relied on her parents a lot but they lived in a different country. I clearly remember the mom telling her it was ok to rely on them and not to rely on a boyfriend. I remember feeling offended at the time. Now that I have a daughter, I absolutely 100% would rather her call me or Dh for help for anything.

21 is college age. He is allowed to be there for his daughter if she needs him.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know, OP. It could be him/her, or it could be you. I am extremely wary of women who dislike their partner’s daughters.

My mother died when I was a teen. My dad threw himself into dating, and would take the advice and modify his lifestyle to suit each new woman. Many of them seemed to view me as competition, some kind of useless leech about whom they needed to “show” my dad the truth.

Here are some things my dad’s girlfriends viewed as “bratty”, “clingy”, and generally unreasonable:

1. Wanting to be allowed to have a high school graduation party (small, just a few friends, and we were studious, well-behaved kids) at home.

2. Asking my dad for a bottle of perfume for my 17th birthday (my dad was financially comfortable and the perfume was expensive for perfume; my dad’s girlfriend ranted and raved about how a girl my age had no business with something like that, and SHE was happy with the Body Shop when she was my age. Also, this was months after my mom’s death).

3. Wanting my dad to come to my college graduation. He didn’t, finally, because she “needed” him to help her pick out a new car.

4. Asking if I could live at home until I had saved a down payment for an apartment. This would have taken a few months because I had a job lined up after graduation. The answer was ultimately no.

5. Asking my dad to LEND me a down payment for my first apartment right after college. I had a job lined up but nowhere to go from the dorms and no money for a down payment. He ultimately refused, after much talk with his girlfriend who said I needed to “learn to make it” on my own. The story of how I lived for a few months until I got a down payment makes me so angry for my 22 year old self.

Sorry, but I have learned that women are naturally distrustful of a partner’s daughter, and they never, ever view the partner’s daughter they way they would their own child.

This is called projecting. See a therapist. She was absolutely correct about #2 and #5. . And your dad agreed to these things. His choice he was a grown man. So you should be mad at him too.

There is nothing shameful about needing therapy after all that shit that her dad and his significant other(s?) pulled right after she lost her mother.

And I’m sure you could use some yourself.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know, OP. It could be him/her, or it could be you. I am extremely wary of women who dislike their partner’s daughters.

My mother died when I was a teen. My dad threw himself into dating, and would take the advice and modify his lifestyle to suit each new woman. Many of them seemed to view me as competition, some kind of useless leech about whom they needed to “show” my dad the truth.

Here are some things my dad’s girlfriends viewed as “bratty”, “clingy”, and generally unreasonable:

1. Wanting to be allowed to have a high school graduation party (small, just a few friends, and we were studious, well-behaved kids) at home.

2. Asking my dad for a bottle of perfume for my 17th birthday (my dad was financially comfortable and the perfume was expensive for perfume; my dad’s girlfriend ranted and raved about how a girl my age had no business with something like that, and SHE was happy with the Body Shop when she was my age. Also, this was months after my mom’s death).

3. Wanting my dad to come to my college graduation. He didn’t, finally, because she “needed” him to help her pick out a new car.

4. Asking if I could live at home until I had saved a down payment for an apartment. This would have taken a few months because I had a job lined up after graduation. The answer was ultimately no.

5. Asking my dad to LEND me a down payment for my first apartment right after college. I had a job lined up but nowhere to go from the dorms and no money for a down payment. He ultimately refused, after much talk with his girlfriend who said I needed to “learn to make it” on my own. The story of how I lived for a few months until I got a down payment makes me so angry for my 22 year old self.

Sorry, but I have learned that women are naturally distrustful of a partner’s daughter, and they never, ever view the partner’s daughter they way they would their own child.

This is called projecting. See a therapist. She was absolutely correct about #2 and #5. . And your dad agreed to these things. His choice he was a grown man. So you should be mad at him too.

Wanting perfume and a place to sleep is bratty/clingy/unreasonable?

Are you a stepmother?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know, OP. It could be him/her, or it could be you. I am extremely wary of women who dislike their partner’s daughters.

My mother died when I was a teen. My dad threw himself into dating, and would take the advice and modify his lifestyle to suit each new woman. Many of them seemed to view me as competition, some kind of useless leech about whom they needed to “show” my dad the truth.

Here are some things my dad’s girlfriends viewed as “bratty”, “clingy”, and generally unreasonable:

1. Wanting to be allowed to have a high school graduation party (small, just a few friends, and we were studious, well-behaved kids) at home.

2. Asking my dad for a bottle of perfume for my 17th birthday (my dad was financially comfortable and the perfume was expensive for perfume; my dad’s girlfriend ranted and raved about how a girl my age had no business with something like that, and SHE was happy with the Body Shop when she was my age. Also, this was months after my mom’s death).

3. Wanting my dad to come to my college graduation. He didn’t, finally, because she “needed” him to help her pick out a new car.

4. Asking if I could live at home until I had saved a down payment for an apartment. This would have taken a few months because I had a job lined up after graduation. The answer was ultimately no.

5. Asking my dad to LEND me a down payment for my first apartment right after college. I had a job lined up but nowhere to go from the dorms and no money for a down payment. He ultimately refused, after much talk with his girlfriend who said I needed to “learn to make it” on my own. The story of how I lived for a few months until I got a down payment makes me so angry for my 22 year old self.

Sorry, but I have learned that women are naturally distrustful of a partner’s daughter, and they never, ever view the partner’s daughter they way they would their own child.

This is called projecting. See a therapist. She was absolutely correct about #2 and #5. . And your dad agreed to these things. His choice he was a grown man. So you should be mad at him too.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know, OP. It could be him/her, or it could be you. I am extremely wary of women who dislike their partner’s daughters.

My mother died when I was a teen. My dad threw himself into dating, and would take the advice and modify his lifestyle to suit each new woman. Many of them seemed to view me as competition, some kind of useless leech about whom they needed to “show” my dad the truth.

Here are some things my dad’s girlfriends viewed as “bratty”, “clingy”, and generally unreasonable:

1. Wanting to be allowed to have a high school graduation party (small, just a few friends, and we were studious, well-behaved kids) at home.

2. Asking my dad for a bottle of perfume for my 17th birthday (my dad was financially comfortable and the perfume was expensive for perfume; my dad’s girlfriend ranted and raved about how a girl my age had no business with something like that, and SHE was happy with the Body Shop when she was my age. Also, this was months after my mom’s death).

3. Wanting my dad to come to my college graduation. He didn’t, finally, because she “needed” him to help her pick out a new car.

4. Asking if I could live at home until I had saved a down payment for an apartment. This would have taken a few months because I had a job lined up after graduation. The answer was ultimately no.

5. Asking my dad to LEND me a down payment for my first apartment right after college. I had a job lined up but nowhere to go from the dorms and no money for a down payment. He ultimately refused, after much talk with his girlfriend who said I needed to “learn to make it” on my own. The story of how I lived for a few months until I got a down payment makes me so angry for my 22 year old self.

Sorry, but I have learned that women are naturally distrustful of a partner’s daughter, and they never, ever view the partner’s daughter they way they would their own child.

This is called projecting. See a therapist. She was absolutely correct about #2 and #5. . And your dad agreed to these things. His choice he was a grown man. So you should be mad at him too.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know, OP. It could be him/her, or it could be you. I am extremely wary of women who dislike their partner’s daughters.

My mother died when I was a teen. My dad threw himself into dating, and would take the advice and modify his lifestyle to suit each new woman. Many of them seemed to view me as competition, some kind of useless leech about whom they needed to “show” my dad the truth.

Here are some things my dad’s girlfriends viewed as “bratty”, “clingy”, and generally unreasonable:

1. Wanting to be allowed to have a high school graduation party (small, just a few friends, and we were studious, well-behaved kids) at home.

2. Asking my dad for a bottle of perfume for my 17th birthday (my dad was financially comfortable and the perfume was expensive for perfume; my dad’s girlfriend ranted and raved about how a girl my age had no business with something like that, and SHE was happy with the Body Shop when she was my age. Also, this was months after my mom’s death).

3. Wanting my dad to come to my college graduation. He didn’t, finally, because she “needed” him to help her pick out a new car.

4. Asking if I could live at home until I had saved a down payment for an apartment. This would have taken a few months because I had a job lined up after graduation. The answer was ultimately no.

5. Asking my dad to LEND me a down payment for my first apartment right after college. I had a job lined up but nowhere to go from the dorms and no money for a down payment. He ultimately refused, after much talk with his girlfriend who said I needed to “learn to make it” on my own. The story of how I lived for a few months until I got a down payment makes me so angry for my 22 year old self.

Sorry, but I have learned that women are naturally distrustful of a partner’s daughter, and they never, ever view the partner’s daughter they way they would their own child.

Anonymous wrote:My kids are half her age but 21 still sounds so young for her dad not to be helping her out! You parent your way but don't be an evil stepmother working against her behind the scenes to cut off her health insurance.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know, OP. It could be him/her, or it could be you. I am extremely wary of women who dislike their partner’s daughters.

My mother died when I was a teen. My dad threw himself into dating, and would take the advice and modify his lifestyle to suit each new woman. Many of them seemed to view me as competition, some kind of useless leech about whom they needed to “show” my dad the truth.

Here are some things my dad’s girlfriends viewed as “bratty”, “clingy”, and generally unreasonable:

1. Wanting to be allowed to have a high school graduation party (small, just a few friends, and we were studious, well-behaved kids) at home.

2. Asking my dad for a bottle of perfume for my 17th birthday (my dad was financially comfortable and the perfume was expensive for perfume; my dad’s girlfriend ranted and raved about how a girl my age had no business with something like that, and SHE was happy with the Body Shop when she was my age. Also, this was months after my mom’s death).

3. Wanting my dad to come to my college graduation. He didn’t, finally, because she “needed” him to help her pick out a new car.

4. Asking if I could live at home until I had saved a down payment for an apartment. This would have taken a few months because I had a job lined up after graduation. The answer was ultimately no.

5. Asking my dad to LEND me a down payment for my first apartment right after college. I had a job lined up but nowhere to go from the dorms and no money for a down payment. He ultimately refused, after much talk with his girlfriend who said I needed to “learn to make it” on my own. The story of how I lived for a few months until I got a down payment makes me so angry for my 22 year old self.

Sorry, but I have learned that women are naturally distrustful of a partner’s daughter, and they never, ever view the partner’s daughter they way they would their own child.