I got tired of my kids asking to try something and then immediately wanting to quit. Like knock down drag out “you can’t make me do this activity”, quitting. I got exhausted with that song and dance.

They really don’t like sports. They aren’t good at sports. They like reading and drawing, so that’s what they do. We try to not worry about not pushing them into activities ….but I do worry about college admissions, and whether they will regret not sticking with things.

My kids are awesome, and so different than I thought they would be

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The college thing cracks me up honestly. So they'll take a kid with 14,000 different activities over a kid with just a few? Do they really believe quantity over quality is better? The more activities a kid has the less I believe that the kid actually wants them.

I don’t think anyone is saying this at all. OP’s kids is basically a do-nothing and people are advocating he do something not a million things, something.

I know, i was commenting on college admissions and activities,which someone brought up earlier.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The college thing cracks me up honestly. So they'll take a kid with 14,000 different activities over a kid with just a few? Do they really believe quantity over quality is better? The more activities a kid has the less I believe that the kid actually wants them.

+1

Colleges don't fall for it.

What do you mean they don't fall for it? College admission is practically the entire reason for all these activities that have become apparently necessary for kids.

I’ve always thought activities were for the purpose of developing hobbies, socializing, learning how to work as a team, becoming physically fit, helping to discover areas of interest for potential career paths, etc.

+1

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The college thing cracks me up honestly. So they'll take a kid with 14,000 different activities over a kid with just a few? Do they really believe quantity over quality is better? The more activities a kid has the less I believe that the kid actually wants them.

+1

Colleges don't fall for it.

What do you mean they don't fall for it? College admission is practically the entire reason for all these activities that have become apparently necessary for kids.

I’ve always thought activities were for the purpose of developing hobbies, socializing, learning how to work as a team, becoming physically fit, helping to discover areas of interest for potential career paths, etc.

Anonymous wrote:The college thing cracks me up honestly. So they'll take a kid with 14,000 different activities over a kid with just a few? Do they really believe quantity over quality is better? The more activities a kid has the less I believe that the kid actually wants them.

I don’t think anyone is saying this at all. OP’s kids is basically a do-nothing and people are advocating he do something not a million things, something.

Kids should do stuff they are interested in doing. 14 year olds very often don’t have specific interests yet absent a sport or instrument or dance that they will stick with through high school and beyond.

So - have some talks about what may be interesting to do in high school. You want school stuff because of the social connections.

As anyone who has had kids apply to college can tell you - the big schools only care about gpa and test scores. The small schools care about $ and also what your kid does. BUT no high prestige school cares about kids who are jacks of all trades. The are looking for kids who focus on one or maybe two major things so their enticing class can be interesting and diverse.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The college thing cracks me up honestly. So they'll take a kid with 14,000 different activities over a kid with just a few? Do they really believe quantity over quality is better? The more activities a kid has the less I believe that the kid actually wants them.

+1

Colleges don't fall for it.

What do you mean they don't fall for it? College admission is practically the entire reason for all these activities that have become apparently necessary for kids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The college thing cracks me up honestly. So they'll take a kid with 14,000 different activities over a kid with just a few? Do they really believe quantity over quality is better? The more activities a kid has the less I believe that the kid actually wants them.

Well OP’s kid basically has nothing. I doubt his one hour a week activity is “quality.” Maybe he’s really awesome at TikTok watching?

But, yes, colleges do actually want kids who are interesting and have something to contribute.

I wasn't referring to OPs kid, I was referring to colleges admissions in general. And its sad if pp think you aren't interesting and have nothing to contribute I not for activities.

Anonymous wrote:The college thing cracks me up honestly. So they'll take a kid with 14,000 different activities over a kid with just a few? Do they really believe quantity over quality is better? The more activities a kid has the less I believe that the kid actually wants them.

+1

Colleges don't fall for it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The college thing cracks me up honestly. So they'll take a kid with 14,000 different activities over a kid with just a few? Do they really believe quantity over quality is better? The more activities a kid has the less I believe that the kid actually wants them.

It’s truly so dumb. Four years of being a joiner and checking all the right boxes and then you find out everyone else was doing the same thing, so you’ve distinguished yourself not at all.

Have you actually gone through an admissions process with your kid? My kid just did an hour long admissions interview and beyond discussing his favorite subject and his career aspirations for 10 minutes, the entire rest of the interview was focused on his “activities,” specifically art, writing, and a high level sport he plays.

Anonymous wrote:The college thing cracks me up honestly. So they'll take a kid with 14,000 different activities over a kid with just a few? Do they really believe quantity over quality is better? The more activities a kid has the less I believe that the kid actually wants them.

Well OP’s kid basically has nothing. I doubt his one hour a week activity is “quality.” Maybe he’s really awesome at TikTok watching?

But, yes, colleges do actually want kids who are interesting and have something to contribute.

Anonymous wrote:The college thing cracks me up honestly. So they'll take a kid with 14,000 different activities over a kid with just a few? Do they really believe quantity over quality is better? The more activities a kid has the less I believe that the kid actually wants them.

It’s truly so dumb. Four years of being a joiner and checking all the right boxes and then you find out everyone else was doing the same thing, so you’ve distinguished yourself not at all.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 14 year old son has one one-hour after school activity and that's it. There's no activity he shows any interest in. He's not into sports (has tried quite a few but hasn't had the aptitude), he's tried various musical instruments but gave up after a couple years. He's a good student, reads a lot, is on his phone a lot and that's about it. I know he's bored quite a bit of the time. Anyone else in this situation? Or have ideas on how I can encourage him to do more/ how to find something he might actually like?

Reading is an activity. This sounds fine to me. It’s what I like to do, and it’s what I liked to do when I was a kid, and I’m doing okay!

Is he interested in art at all? Maybe he’d like a digital art class?

Don’t people give any though to college applications? You really think when colleges ask about clubs, activities, leadership, interests…your kid will be an automatic admit by saying “dur..me read?”

It's really deep and meaningful how the possibility of getting college is the main reason do do stuff. That's an amazing lesson to impart. And sort of pointless, because look at how many I DO EVERYTHING kids get rejected because they are competing against so many other I DO EVERYTHING kids.

OP, your kid needs to find a couple of things he likes and build off of that. Try a bunch of rec classes or activities, or some volunteer jobs. Throw a wide net. If he likes to read, he can volunteer at the library or eventually get a job in a bookstore. He can tutor younger kids. He will figure it out.

You don’t need a ton of activities. You could just do one thing and be very good at it.

The college thing cracks me up honestly. So they'll take a kid with 14,000 different activities over a kid with just a few? Do they really believe quantity over quality is better? The more activities a kid has the less I believe that the kid actually wants them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 14 year old son has one one-hour after school activity and that's it. There's no activity he shows any interest in. He's not into sports (has tried quite a few but hasn't had the aptitude), he's tried various musical instruments but gave up after a couple years. He's a good student, reads a lot, is on his phone a lot and that's about it. I know he's bored quite a bit of the time. Anyone else in this situation? Or have ideas on how I can encourage him to do more/ how to find something he might actually like?

Reading is an activity. This sounds fine to me. It’s what I like to do, and it’s what I liked to do when I was a kid, and I’m doing okay!

Is he interested in art at all? Maybe he’d like a digital art class?

Don’t people give any though to college applications? You really think when colleges ask about clubs, activities, leadership, interests…your kid will be an automatic admit by saying “dur..me read?”

It's really deep and meaningful how the possibility of getting college is the main reason do do stuff. That's an amazing lesson to impart. And sort of pointless, because look at how many I DO EVERYTHING kids get rejected because they are competing against so many other I DO EVERYTHING kids.

OP, your kid needs to find a couple of things he likes and build off of that. Try a bunch of rec classes or activities, or some volunteer jobs. Throw a wide net. If he likes to read, he can volunteer at the library or eventually get a job in a bookstore. He can tutor younger kids. He will figure it out.