Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I want to retire to a condo with an elevator in downtown Portland, Maine with an ocean view, walkable to shops & restaurants. DH wants to retire to a smallish SFH outside of Portland with some land. We’ll see who wins!

Those both sound like bliss!

+1! Glad that my DH and I won't be the only DMV transplants

I'd like to have some good years of health without excessive financial worries. Then, a quick downhill slide to death taking about 2 weeks (so people can visit).

Anonymous wrote:We are retired and our kids and grandchildren all live near each other so we have a six month home near them and we love it. But during the winter we have a home next to the beach and downtown in a very sane area of Florida. We travel back and forth to see them and they all visit us so it’s really ideal. Our overhead is very high but we make it work.

NP here. This is basically exactly what we want. I hope my 2 daughters cooperate and live near each other! Lol.

I find retirement communities depressing. Will be happy to stay in my house where I am now.

So what is the age difference (how many years will you continue to work while he's retired)? I have about a 3 year gap and so trying to figure out a nice balance.

NP. The trick is to NOT be resentful when your spouse retires and has all this free time. Encourage them to travel without you. Encourage them to do things independently. You will be thankful later. It's a bit of a skill, to regain one's youthful sense of independence. You want that in a spouse. How to fill one's time alone. You don't want to be in each other's way, all day, once you're both retired. It may take them a few years to settle into a retirement groove.

DH will probably retire when he’s 70, so in 20 years. He would ideally stay with the same company he’s with now. He loves his work and would be bored if he stopped working young.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I actually really want to move to a retirement community where there are lots of planned activities. I read an article about that Margaritaville place and I’m ready to move there now! I’d love on-site golf, tennis, dining, etc. But we are only in our mid 30s with young kids so that won’t happen any time soon.

OP here and I'm really trying to understand... you don't think you would get bored of this lifestyle? Would you be fine with just seeing only people of your age group? You wouldn't feel disconnected from the rest of the world and society?

When I was in college, I lived in a dorm and socialized almost exclusively with other college kids.
When I was in my mid 20s, I lived in city apartment and socialized primarily with other young unmarrieds or newlyweds.
When I had kids, I moved to a suburban neighborhood and socialized mainly with other parents.
When I retire, I'll probably want to spend most of my time with people my age. Yes, they're old but I'll be old too.
Retirement communities aren't prisons and they usually aren't located in remote areas. I'll still be able to travel, engage with the larger community, volunteer, and interact with people outside my age group.

This. I kind of think of it as college for older people. Planned activities and a somewhat structured social scene may be better for some types, although one can certainly have/make their own community in any city. Preparing to die? No, just having some fun.

That said, I'm not sure if we'll actually go for it, just that I can see the appeal. It likely depends on 1) do i still have a spouse 2) what kind of community do we hace / can we develop where we are living 3) where any family / kids are at. I would personally hate to move to a new city and start all over from scratch, but maybe I'll change my mind. (Yes, I'm introverted and not the most adept socially, but I'm optimistic my social skills will continue to grow )

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would love to move back to Manhattan or west side of LA.

Wow surprised to see so many more people here that want to retire in a city.... I thought I was the outlier!

I think it's so important to be able to walk places in retirement. Elders who live in the suburbs and are car-dependent are trapped once they're no longer able to drive.

Actually it’s really unsafe to walk everywhere when you are too old to drive. You will fall or get hit by a car.

If you keep that attitude you will. If you stay in decent shape, people now don’t seem elderly until nearly 90. If you are sporty, the sky’s the limit. I know a 95-year-old who still sails on the Delaware River near his home.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I want to move to a one level house in a lower cost area nearby DC and then use extra money to travel A LOT. When I'm old and can't drive anymore then will move to apt in the city

The last thing you want to be doing is making a big move when you are so old that you can't drive anymore.

My MIL is now going through this. The thought of moving now is very daunting for her.

You want to make that move before you get to that point.

The concept of not being able to drive but navigate crosswalks in the city is laughable.

Really? my mom has mid-stage Alzheimer's and can't drive but can navigate an NYC crosswalk just fine. As she says "even with Alzheimer's I don't get lost in Manhattan because the streets are numbered!"

Obviously she has an aide because otherwise she would set fire to her apartment but when she and I go out walking, she can walk and navigate the streets just fine. If I am living on the upper west side in my 80s walking to Fairway and get killed crossing the street, I would consider that a life well lived!

+1 I'm the ^PP with the MIIL with this issue.... she walks to the grocery store, albeit very slowly now.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've been thinking about retirement (I'm 45, so still a long way off), and my husband wants to move somewhere nice for retiring. When I think about moving some place nice, I kind of cringe a little - it's like where you go to slowly die.

No matter my our financial statusI would love to be engaged with my community, friends, family. Be able to walk everywhere. Be able to give back to my neighborhood and community in some form or other. A community with all different ages and life stages.

Going to a retirement town seems like the opposite of that - joining up with other old people, spending a life of leisure, preparing to die... does everyone want this?

Totally agree. Dh wanted to move to wherever the kid ended up, so I had mixed feelings about that. Figured I'd adjust but what if it's a place where there's no mass transit or walkability? But then kid and fiance announced they wanted to move back to Maryland. Whew!

this is the thing... lots of people these days don't stay in one place for their entire lives, especially if they work white collar jobs.

I posted a few times now.. between my spouse and I, there are seven siblings in total, and only one lives close to the parents. We are spread all over the world, three different continents.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I actually really want to move to a retirement community where there are lots of planned activities. I read an article about that Margaritaville place and I’m ready to move there now! I’d love on-site golf, tennis, dining, etc. But we are only in our mid 30s with young kids so that won’t happen any time soon.

OP here and I'm really trying to understand... you don't think you would get bored of this lifestyle? Would you be fine with just seeing only people of your age group? You wouldn't feel disconnected from the rest of the world and society?

When I was in college, I lived in a dorm and socialized almost exclusively with other college kids.
When I was in my mid 20s, I lived in city apartment and socialized primarily with other young unmarrieds or newlyweds.
When I had kids, I moved to a suburban neighborhood and socialized mainly with other parents.
When I retire, I'll probably want to spend most of my time with people my age. Yes, they're old but I'll be old too.
Retirement communities aren't prisons and they usually aren't located in remote areas. I'll still be able to travel, engage with the larger community, volunteer, and interact with people outside my age group.

+1 to all this. Many of my current neighbors are older and we just don't have anything in common because we are in completely different places in life. They're not really interested in hanging out with my little kids (understandable) and I don't have time/energy to do the activities they do. On a somewhat related note, I don't have a whole lot in common with the younger and single/childless employees so we don't socialize outside of work. They surely have no interest in my little kid stuff and I'm in bed by 10:30 so the late night bar scene isn't really my thing anymore.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I actually really want to move to a retirement community where there are lots of planned activities. I read an article about that Margaritaville place and I’m ready to move there now! I’d love on-site golf, tennis, dining, etc. But we are only in our mid 30s with young kids so that won’t happen any time soon.

OP here and I'm really trying to understand... you don't think you would get bored of this lifestyle? Would you be fine with just seeing only people of your age group? You wouldn't feel disconnected from the rest of the world and society?

When I was in college, I lived in a dorm and socialized almost exclusively with other college kids.
When I was in my mid 20s, I lived in city apartment and socialized primarily with other young unmarrieds or newlyweds.
When I had kids, I moved to a suburban neighborhood and socialized mainly with other parents.
When I retire, I'll probably want to spend most of my time with people my age. Yes, they're old but I'll be old too.
Retirement communities aren't prisons and they usually aren't located in remote areas. I'll still be able to travel, engage with the larger community, volunteer, and interact with people outside my age group.

Anonymous wrote:I've been thinking about retirement (I'm 45, so still a long way off), and my husband wants to move somewhere nice for retiring. When I think about moving some place nice, I kind of cringe a little - it's like where you go to slowly die.

No matter my our financial statusI would love to be engaged with my community, friends, family. Be able to walk everywhere. Be able to give back to my neighborhood and community in some form or other. A community with all different ages and life stages.

Going to a retirement town seems like the opposite of that - joining up with other old people, spending a life of leisure, preparing to die... does everyone want this?

Totally agree. Dh wanted to move to wherever the kid ended up, so I had mixed feelings about that. Figured I'd adjust but what if it's a place where there's no mass transit or walkability? But then kid and fiance announced they wanted to move back to Maryland. Whew!

We are in Charlottesville and found it is a good balance in lifestyle. As mentioned UVA Med Center and a strong community hospital system, Sentara, have any kind of doctor you may need within 15 - 30 minutes of driving. There are the university related activities depending upon your interests as well as a lifelong Ollie program with daytime relatively inexpensive short term workshops. There is brand new senior center called The Center. You can choose areas with condos or homes which have a lot of walkability, but probably not wo all key services. However there is also a para-transit system and area bus system which can be used as one may not drive. As noted you are within two hours of DC and all it offers including airports and about an hour to Richmond. There are a number of tiered continuing care communities to choose from later in retirement. The one drawback are the very hot/humid summers. However, given the weather extremes all over the country not bad in comparison to snow/cold winters, fires, floods or tornados. Very diverse community and hundreds of nonprofits to be able get involved with.

We are retired and our kids and grandchildren all live near each other so we have a six month home near them and we love it. But during the winter we have a home next to the beach and downtown in a very sane area of Florida. We travel back and forth to see them and they all visit us so it’s really ideal. Our overhead is very high but we make it work.