Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is freaking me out. I’m on a business trip and wife just sent me a video. So scared like is next year the year it stops? Or is dcum full of losers and weirdos? I hope the latter but I am scared

Assuming you have kids, you should be fine. For many couples, the fun, sexy times goes away when the kids come but if your wife is still being flirty now you have a good chance to keep a good marital sex life going. Just don't be complacent about it.

DCUM is full of largely white, UMC, unhappy women in boring relationships who view lack of desire as normal and think their husbands should be celibate because they don’t want sex. Sieve enough time here yiu will find that there is a strain of Puritanism here that outdoes Jonathan Edwards. It’s sad, really, to read so many here who are not fully loving and embracing themselves as full human beings and enjoying the gifts if the body, heart and spirit God has gifted to us.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Early 50s with menopause plus going on an SSRI for depression.

SSRIs will generally kill libido and destroy your sex life; warn your spouse / partner before going on SSRIs.

Doctors do a terrible job of educating patients of this nearly universal side effect of SSRIs.

When my husband went on antidepressants his sex drive plummeted. He didn't think about sex at all. It also made it very difficult for him to finish. Good times

Sorry to hear that. Hugs, pp.

The “difficulty finishing” part hits home, since a couple of women I dated in the past were taking SSRIs and were unable to finish during; they even struggled, but usually could eventually finish with “electronic assistance” afterwards (which was fine). It seems to be a very common side effect.

Anonymous wrote:When my ex husband became a selfish, fat, drunk.

45 and horny as hell- I’ve had amazing sex since my divorce (with myself and others )

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is freaking me out. I’m on a business trip and wife just sent me a video. So scared like is next year the year it stops? Or is dcum full of losers and weirdos? I hope the latter but I am scared

Assuming you have kids, you should be fine. For many couples, the fun, sexy times goes away when the kids come but if your wife is still being flirty now you have a good chance to keep a good marital sex life going. Just don't be complacent about it.

DCUM is full of largely white, UMC, unhappy women in boring relationships who view lack of desire as normal and think their husbands should be celibate because they don’t want sex. Sieve enough time here yiu will find that there is a strain of Puritanism here that outdoes Jonathan Edwards. It’s sad, really, to read so many here who are not fully loving and embracing themselves as full human beings and enjoying the gifts if the body, heart and spirit God has gifted to us.

Anonymous wrote:This thread is freaking me out. I’m on a business trip and wife just sent me a video. So scared like is next year the year it stops? Or is dcum full of losers and weirdos? I hope the latter but I am scared

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is freaking me out. I’m on a business trip and wife just sent me a video. So scared like is next year the year it stops? Or is dcum full of losers and weirdos? I hope the latter but I am scared

Assuming you have kids, you should be fine. For many couples, the fun, sexy times goes away when the kids come but if your wife is still being flirty now you have a good chance to keep a good marital sex life going. Just don't be complacent about it.

Anonymous wrote:This thread is freaking me out. I’m on a business trip and wife just sent me a video. So scared like is next year the year it stops? Or is dcum full of losers and weirdos? I hope the latter but I am scared

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Early 50s with menopause plus going on an SSRI for depression.

SSRIs will generally kill libido and destroy your sex life; warn your spouse / partner before going on SSRIs.

Doctors do a terrible job of educating patients of this nearly universal side effect of SSRIs.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:FWIW...

I am a 56yo male and started dating a 58yo woman about 5 months ago. She had been divorced for many years and had survive cancer and a double mastectomy. Prior to meeting her, I had come out of a difficult marriage and a horrible divorce, and hadn't dated in years and had given up hope of a good sex life which caused my drive to plummet. I felt I was finally ready to date and we luckily crossed paths. Here is what I want to add to this thread...

I am completely in love with her and she with me. We both agree that the sex we are having is the best of our lives, and we are doing it a lot. Our sex drive(s) are what we both felt during our much younger years, but when combined with knowing ourselves, our bodies, and not being afraid to ask for what we want and try things, it's incredible. It feels normal, natural, hot, loving, and easy - and a regular topic of conversation. I never imagined that I would be having sex like this at this age.

And this is all despite the fact that our bodies are far from perfect. We often talk about, accept, and even embrace our imperfections. For instance, I make an effort to give her pleasure where her breasts once were because I want her to reconnect with those feelings.

So what I found is that our sex drives are largely fueled by our relationship; a bad relationship = low sex drive and visa versa.

Lastly, I will say that even though my marriage was in the crapper, I believe that it could have been saved and our sex life could have come back. She wasn't willing to go to counseling and put in the work so it unfortunately went to all out war. But I'm glad it did because the hell I went through was worth the heaven I'm living now.

I wish you all good luck in revitalizing, or continuing, this incredibly important part of your relationship... and life!

This is really incredible. I wonder if there’s something you can do within an existing relationship to make your partner feel desired again. Is it the way you pay attention to them? Talk?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:FWIW...

I am a 56yo male and started dating a 58yo woman about 5 months ago. She had been divorced for many years and had survive cancer and a double mastectomy. Prior to meeting her, I had come out of a difficult marriage and a horrible divorce, and hadn't dated in years and had given up hope of a good sex life which caused my drive to plummet. I felt I was finally ready to date and we luckily crossed paths. Here is what I want to add to this thread...

I am completely in love with her and she with me. We both agree that the sex we are having is the best of our lives, and we are doing it a lot. Our sex drive(s) are what we both felt during our much younger years, but when combined with knowing ourselves, our bodies, and not being afraid to ask for what we want and try things, it's incredible. It feels normal, natural, hot, loving, and easy - and a regular topic of conversation. I never imagined that I would be having sex like this at this age.

And this is all despite the fact that our bodies are far from perfect. We often talk about, accept, and even embrace our imperfections. For instance, I make an effort to give her pleasure where her breasts once were because I want her to reconnect with those feelings.

So what I found is that our sex drives are largely fueled by our relationship; a bad relationship = low sex drive and visa versa.

Lastly, I will say that even though my marriage was in the crapper, I believe that it could have been saved and our sex life could have come back. She wasn't willing to go to counseling and put in the work so it unfortunately went to all out war. But I'm glad it did because the hell I went through was worth the heaven I'm living now.

I wish you all good luck in revitalizing, or continuing, this incredibly important part of your relationship... and life!

This is really incredible. I wonder if there’s something you can do within an existing relationship to make your partner feel desired again. Is it the way you pay attention to them? Talk?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dropped with a newborn but plummeted after menopause

I am the exact opposite: Drive has soared after menopause.

Evidence of how this is completely individual and therefore unpredictable (with exceptions, like use of SSRIs or other meds affecting libido). So anyone reading this thread should not read too much into it as some sort of survey applicable to them personally....

Statistically some trends are more likely than others (kids & menopause will usually be correlated with a drop in libido rather than the reverse), but yes, individual cases can and do vary.