Anonymous wrote:Foster first

+1. I do not want pets but my kids have been going on about it for some time. A friend needed someone to cat-sit her pet for roughly 1 month while they waited for their house to be finished. They had to move to an interim place which had a 1 pet limit so we offered to take the cat. It was a great trial run. Kids got a taste for what owning a pet was all about. I realized that no matter how much kids wanted it, I couldn't handle it and would need to take care of nearly 100% of duties. We took great care of the kitty while we had her but happily gave her back to owner once they moved into their new place a few weeks later. It was a great trial run for me and the kids. If you can foster, do it first before committing 100% to being a pet owner.

Anonymous wrote:I didn't want a dog either. But we got a portuguese water dog when our kids were 6 and 8 and she has been an incredibly great dog. We spent a lot of effort up front training her (puppy kindergarten and the next level up - classes which are really meant to train you BTW) and she is just lovely. She's not that big (50 pounds and can easily ride in the back of our wagon), doesn't shed, and because she was socialized well when young she is not reactive to other dogs. I would recommend a puppy over a shelter/rescue dog for that reason.

There are plenty of puppies available through rescues.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm considering relenting to a relentless campaign by my children and husband to get a dog. We have cats, which is one of my reasons for not wanting a dog (what if they never get along?), plus the usual concerns about who will walk the dog, clean up the poop etc. My children swear they would walk it, but I don't think they fully understand what it would be like to have to deal with a dog that has to pee at 5:30 a.m.!
With all that said, can anyone recommend a small-ish, non-shedding, good-natured breed or mix that might fit our situation?

Don't get a dog unless you will love it unconditionally.

She loves her children unconditionally and that’s why she is considering it.

Basenji-the cat of the dog family. They don’t bark (but do yodel), clean themselves, and are hypoallergenic.

I don't think you should be pressured into this. But if you are...

I have a maltipoo and it is a very-low maintenance dog. Loves walks, loves every dog we meet, runs around like a maniac in the backyard, but is also happy to just chill on our laps all day. She is very small (tiny poops!), doesn't shed, doesn't smell, is incredibly cute and very smart. My kids have taught her all sorts of tricks, which she seems to love performing. She did take longer to housebreak than my previous dogs (like she would still have an accident per week until she was five months or so) but never woke up at night.

I had never been sold on toy-sized dogs before but they really are easier.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Best timing is when oldest is 10 years old and youngest is 5-6. That way, the dog is elderly when they are busy teens and ready for the rainbow bridge when you hit empty nester stage.

I would write out all the expectations and make the kids sign it. You have the most negotiating power now. Once you get the dog, you have no negotiating power left. Be clear about feeding, grooming, walks and who is expected to do it the .

I ageee that a small inside dog is probably the least works. Some big dogs like goldens or Great Danes are calm and friendly and easy to train though, so could also be a good choice in a different way.

Yes but what if kids don't follow through? Are you not going to care for dog to teach your kids responsibility? If op gets one she has to think of dog as her dog otherwise dont get one.

It’s about making it totally unambiguous and not up for negotiation. The worst is kids trying to wheedle out or say they did it yesterday so should get today off or whatever. Just show them the contract and say—this is what we agreed to. If you can’t keep up your end of the bargain, then we can’t have the dog. Calm, no argument. I’ll cover for a kid if they are sick or if there is some unusual thing going on but I’m not just going to step in and do something they agreed to do. Just be super clear about it so you aren’t the bad guy—they are clearly at fault if the situation doesn’t work out because they failed to hold up their end of the bargain.
Husband should also be clear about what he’s agreeing to.

Get a dog that matches your family’s activity level, energy level, etc., and then everyone will enjoy it more. We bring our dog on hikes and it is really fun; a bichon, for example, couldn’t do that. If your family is more home bodyish, then maybe a smaller dog would be best. If you will be away from home most of the day post COVID, don’t get a clingy breed.

Kids should attend dog training classes and you can assign them feeding and walking responsibilities. Puppies are cute but a ton of work. Like babies, they grow out of it.

OP, if your DH is lobbying then you need to have a major come-to-Jesus with him about dog care, complete with discussion about his track record for meeting other commitments of this nature. 100% recommend fostering or dog-sitting first, and 100% not ok for you to carry the burden for something the others want.

I didn't want a dog either. But we got a portuguese water dog when our kids were 6 and 8 and she has been an incredibly great dog. We spent a lot of effort up front training her (puppy kindergarten and the next level up - classes which are really meant to train you BTW) and she is just lovely. She's not that big (50 pounds and can easily ride in the back of our wagon), doesn't shed, and because she was socialized well when young she is not reactive to other dogs. I would recommend a puppy over a shelter/rescue dog for that reason.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree with many. Don’t get a puppy. I was talked into getting one as COVID drags on indefinitely. Now we are stuck with one (even though she is adorable). To me there is almost no joy but only mountains of work. I will be happy to give her away if the rest of my family are on board.

We are going through the same. Today he peed three times in the house within one hour. The vet told us at his age, he can hold three hours. We take him out 9 times a day and he still has accidents. Everything is about making him happy.

Hang in there. Our puppy had no more accidents at 3 to 4 months old. But there will be other challenges, many many challenges, even with an absolutely healthy and cute puppy like ours. When I look back, it's a sacrifice of our time, money, energy, and freedom, for a companionship. At least, it brought some happiness to the rest of my family at this difficult time.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Best timing is when oldest is 10 years old and youngest is 5-6. That way, the dog is elderly when they are busy teens and ready for the rainbow bridge when you hit empty nester stage.

I would write out all the expectations and make the kids sign it. You have the most negotiating power now. Once you get the dog, you have no negotiating power left. Be clear about feeding, grooming, walks and who is expected to do it the .

I ageee that a small inside dog is probably the least works. Some big dogs like goldens or Great Danes are calm and friendly and easy to train though, so could also be a good choice in a different way.

Yes but what if kids don't follow through? Are you not going to care for dog to teach your kids responsibility? If op gets one she has to think of dog as her dog otherwise dont get one.

I'm not the PP, but I absolutely use my dog to teach my kids responsibility. If they don't follow through, I respond pretty much the same way I respond if they don't follow through on other responsibilities. I make sure it happens, even if that involves nagging, or taking the video game controller out of their hands, or, or telling them "I used my time to walk your dog this afternoon when you forgot, you're cleaning the kitchen for me tonight" or even mildly embarrassing them by knocking on a friend's door (pre-pandemic) with dog in hand and saying "you forgot to walk Fideaux, tell your friends you'll see them later, and walk him home". (OK, I didn't actually do the last, but my kids know I would". However, I handled it, the dog's needs got met.

The only difference with the dog is that unlike a responsibility like tooth brushing, I can and do offer to take care of the dog if they have an opportunity to do something elsewhere.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm considering relenting to a relentless campaign by my children and husband to get a dog. We have cats, which is one of my reasons for not wanting a dog (what if they never get along?), plus the usual concerns about who will walk the dog, clean up the poop etc. My children swear they would walk it, but I don't think they fully understand what it would be like to have to deal with a dog that has to pee at 5:30 a.m.!
With all that said, can anyone recommend a small-ish, non-shedding, good-natured breed or mix that might fit our situation?

Don't get a dog unless you will love it unconditionally.

+1

Anonymous wrote:A collie. Wussy and soulful.

Hyper af. No way would I recommend them.

A collie. Wussy and soulful.

Get a cat.