Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought intj was the rarest- that’s me. I’m a designer, married.

I probably have adhd. I analyze things try to understand things, I enjoy it like figuring out a puzzle. I used to be terrible at maintaining any kind of healthy habits or routines, but I recently have found something that’s working for me. I enjoy my friends and family but in doses. I enjoy my time alone and would never run out of hobbies and curiosities to keep my interest. I love my kids and they also exhaust me because they are always asking things of me throughout the day.

I’m an INTJ. I’ve heard it’s the rarest for women, not sure if it’s the rarest overall. I probably also have ADHD. I’m an attorney and am in management. I am a problem-solver. I’m told that I have great leadership skills. I expect a lot from myself and from others. I am highly disciplined, which leads to healthy habits. I always think with my head, not my heart, which can cause others to think I’m cold. I tell my friends and family I’m the person they should call if they have a problem that needs to be fixed, but if you want a shoulder to cry on, I’m not your girl. I feel the same as you about my kids- I love them, but they exhaust me.

People like this are my kryptonite (INFJ here). I have song strong, intense feelings, and personalities like this are so invalidating. It makes me feel crazy. I also find that often people like this have feelings, but choose not to be in touch with them. Sometimes that leads to behavior they think is “rational” but is really an expression of emotion they are refusing to acknowledge. It’s very frustrating. And if you try to connect on an emotional level, they will reject you because they require an intellectual explanation for everything. It’s so difficult

Anonymous wrote:I thought intj was the rarest- that’s me. I’m a designer, married.

I probably have adhd. I analyze things try to understand things, I enjoy it like figuring out a puzzle. I used to be terrible at maintaining any kind of healthy habits or routines, but I recently have found something that’s working for me. I enjoy my friends and family but in doses. I enjoy my time alone and would never run out of hobbies and curiosities to keep my interest. I love my kids and they also exhaust me because they are always asking things of me throughout the day.

I’m an INTJ. I’ve heard it’s the rarest for women, not sure if it’s the rarest overall. I probably also have ADHD. I’m an attorney and am in management. I am a problem-solver. I’m told that I have great leadership skills. I expect a lot from myself and from others. I am highly disciplined, which leads to healthy habits. I always think with my head, not my heart, which can cause others to think I’m cold. I tell my friends and family I’m the person they should call if they have a problem that needs to be fixed, but if you want a shoulder to cry on, I’m not your girl. I feel the same as you about my kids- I love them, but they exhaust me.

Any other INFJs who can be hot headed?

I have been dealing with anger issues the last few years and it’s so weird for me because that’s not historically been a part of my personality. I wonder if part of it is that I was depressed for many years but have been working hard to disrupt my depressive thinking patterns. I’ve heard depression described as “anger turned inwards.” Sometimes I wonder if my recent anger has been there all along, but now it’s turned outwards.

I do sometimes feel ruled by my emotions. That’s why the anger is so stressful to me. I have tried meditation and mindfulness to try and find ways to detach and observe it, then let it go. But it never quite goes. I wish I could figure out how to master it.

Would love any insight from any other INFJs who have experienced similar.

Anonymous wrote:Yup another one here! I'm a director at a large, international NGO. Married with 2 kids.

Ooo, that sounds like an interesting career to this INFJ! Do you love it?

Anonymous wrote:Yes, INFJ. I was a teacher for many years. I enjoyed many aspects about it, was a good teacher, but always knew I was in the wrong field- teaching is very intrusive- you are "on" al day, no time to regroup, always have to present a facade, no private time, exhausting emotionally. Plus, in order to be a team player and play the game, there's a lot of sucking up and alliance with fad programs and ideas. INFJs can't stand fake anything.,

What I should have been was a journalist, writer, or lawyer- such as an immigration lawyer, or similar, not a criminal or a lot of time in the court room

I am an introvert- but I am social. I like small groups, love my friends and family. My antennae, though, can pick up a liar, or someone's true intentions within seconds. I can tell a lot about a person in first impressions.

I’m an INFJ writer and immigration attorney, and I love it. It’s never too late to do something you want to do! Especially writing—start today!

Anonymous wrote:Yes, I’m a lawyer (currently SAHM), married. I find myself misunderstood often.

Are you me? INFJ here, exactly the same as PP.

Anonymous wrote:^ empath not empathy!

Where did you meet your husband and at what age? What do you do?

^ empath not empathy!

Proud INFJ here and I’ve used it conversations with people assuming everyone knows what the Myers Briggs is, lol. I’m in nonprofit communications, married with 2 small kids. I’m a huge empathy and can feel things very deeply, including being able to read other people very well. I have a difficult time making decisions, despise conflict and hate seeing anyone/anything suffering. I have some close friendships and much prefer those to acquaintances or superficial relationships. I’m a good listener and loyal to the people I care about.

Anonymous wrote:I posted a while ago & have been following. One striking thing is thar INFJs as a group seem very nice - essentially everyone has been very cordial and civil. Which is fairly rare on this board. I suppose that makes perfect sense, as many have commented that they are sensitive and empathetic.

I am very nice and have been called sweet a lot of times but with family or close people i have an assertive side because they all have strong personalities. I have been more assertive as I get older. Standing up for myself and not afraid or as shy but I still retain the generous helpful and sweet side.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are we all night owls, too? I posted at around 11:30, and figured that was the last entry for the night; however, it looks like lots of INFJ people are still up. I love nighttime - I can be alone, my family is asleep, and I can just lay in bed and listen to music or work without interruption.

Always have been! I'm the most creative at night.

I was born at night and have always been a night 🦉 forced to be a morning person for work though. Staying up late makes my mind relax a little

I posted a while ago & have been following. One striking thing is thar INFJs as a group seem very nice - essentially everyone has been very cordial and civil. Which is fairly rare on this board. I suppose that makes perfect sense, as many have commented that they are sensitive and empathetic.

I’m a school psychologist

Anonymous wrote:Yes, INFJ. I was a teacher for many years. I enjoyed many aspects about it, was a good teacher, but always knew I was in the wrong field- teaching is very intrusive- you are "on" al day, no time to regroup, always have to present a facade, no private time, exhausting emotionally. Plus, in order to be a team player and play the game, there's a lot of sucking up and alliance with fad programs and ideas. INFJs can't stand fake anything.,

What I should have been was a journalist, writer, or lawyer- such as an immigration lawyer, or similar, not a criminal or a lot of time in the court room

I am an introvert- but I am social. I like small groups, love my friends and family. My antennae, though, can pick up a liar, or someone's true intentions within seconds. I can tell a lot about a person in first impressions.

Wow same! I am a federal govt lawyer and the thing I cannot stand about working in a government agency is all the fakery and brown nosing. It is so obvious to me when I see it happening, and it is such an immediate turn off, but literally nobody else seems bothered by it (or they hide it well). But I do like: having lots of time to independently work on my project and learn new things, the interesting subject matter, the opportunity to collaborate in small teams but not all the time.

I got married at 25. We dated for 3 years before getting engaged, and were friends for years in college.

I have found fulfillment at finding a way to use my skill set at something I am passionate about. One thing led to another and with each successive position I figured out more about myself and my interests, and eventually found a great match.

To the parent question, my mom loved me deeply and suffered as I suffered in my teenage years. She made me know I was loved even when I felt not good enough. She tried to get me to not procrastinate, but there's only so much you can do to make someone overcome their mental block. I pulled countless all-nighters in high school and college and eventually became more proactive by grad school.

Close friends - I feel fulfilled, but other than my husband, I don't have one female best friend who I do everything with. I have lots of very close friendships with people from work. We do happy hours and text, but don't really get together outside of work. A few of those friends I would tell just about anything, and others I keep more of a filter about the most personal stuff. I have one small group of friends in DC that I see monthly, and we've had a group text going throughout the whole pandemic. I am still in periodic one-on-one communication with 1 close friend from high school, 2 from college, none from grad school, and a work friend from 10 years ago. We touch base every couple of months and pick up where we left off.