Anonymous wrote:And yet, women in the work force have been disproportionately impacted by losing their jobs. An interesting contradiction.

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Anonymous wrote:Just one person’s observations:

I have 2 boys and 1 girl. All college educated with science degrees and all in various forms of health and tech. The youngest is currently a college junior. I think mostly it has to do with family expectations and helping them find a college setting in which they can thrive (not necessarily a top 20 school or whatever). Their friends I’ve seen falter had parents that were too hung up in pushing for collée and career, prestige, salary, etc.

I have 3 children, all boys. One is headed to college this fall (he's in at his first choice), one sophomore, one middle school. My sophomore likely will not go to college. We have been requesting accommodations from the school for 4 years to address his inattentive ADHD and executive function issues - the school has refused. DS has ended up with depression due to the school's refusal. We, his parents, have to put his mental health first. Unfortunately, the school refuses to educate him. Our family expectation was that all of our children would go to college. We didn't anticipate that the school system would fail one of our children so completely and dramatically.

If your son has been diagnosed with ADHD, has executive functioning issues, and attends a public school, he should be able to qualify for a 504 plan or possibly special education. There does have to be an impact on his education (academic or behavioral), but assuming the impact can be shown, ADHD is a medical diagnosis and is the reason many students qualify for 504 plans.

DP. Are you posting from an imaginary land of milk and honey, where school systems genuinely support children with disabilities, especially brown boys? That is lovely but we are talking about reality, not your imaginary world.

NP. My kid with inattentive ADHD in DCPS had a 504 and schools - elementary through high school were good about accommodations. This is a legal requirement and if your school is not complying with the law you have grounds for a lawsuit.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just one person’s observations:

I have 2 boys and 1 girl. All college educated with science degrees and all in various forms of health and tech. The youngest is currently a college junior. I think mostly it has to do with family expectations and helping them find a college setting in which they can thrive (not necessarily a top 20 school or whatever). Their friends I’ve seen falter had parents that were too hung up in pushing for collée and career, prestige, salary, etc.

I have 3 children, all boys. One is headed to college this fall (he's in at his first choice), one sophomore, one middle school. My sophomore likely will not go to college. We have been requesting accommodations from the school for 4 years to address his inattentive ADHD and executive function issues - the school has refused. DS has ended up with depression due to the school's refusal. We, his parents, have to put his mental health first. Unfortunately, the school refuses to educate him. Our family expectation was that all of our children would go to college. We didn't anticipate that the school system would fail one of our children so completely and dramatically.

If your son has been diagnosed with ADHD, has executive functioning issues, and attends a public school, he should be able to qualify for a 504 plan or possibly special education. There does have to be an impact on his education (academic or behavioral), but assuming the impact can be shown, ADHD is a medical diagnosis and is the reason many students qualify for 504 plans.

DP. Are you posting from an imaginary land of milk and honey, where school systems genuinely support children with disabilities, especially brown boys? That is lovely but we are talking about reality, not your imaginary world.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just one person’s observations:

I have 2 boys and 1 girl. All college educated with science degrees and all in various forms of health and tech. The youngest is currently a college junior. I think mostly it has to do with family expectations and helping them find a college setting in which they can thrive (not necessarily a top 20 school or whatever). Their friends I’ve seen falter had parents that were too hung up in pushing for collée and career, prestige, salary, etc.

I have 3 children, all boys. One is headed to college this fall (he's in at his first choice), one sophomore, one middle school. My sophomore likely will not go to college. We have been requesting accommodations from the school for 4 years to address his inattentive ADHD and executive function issues - the school has refused. DS has ended up with depression due to the school's refusal. We, his parents, have to put his mental health first. Unfortunately, the school refuses to educate him. Our family expectation was that all of our children would go to college. We didn't anticipate that the school system would fail one of our children so completely and dramatically.

If your son has been diagnosed with ADHD, has executive functioning issues, and attends a public school, he should be able to qualify for a 504 plan or possibly special education. There does have to be an impact on his education (academic or behavioral), but assuming the impact can be shown, ADHD is a medical diagnosis and is the reason many students qualify for 504 plans.

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Anonymous wrote:This quotation resonated with me based on my experience with my boys, who are not POC. It is ever worse for boys of color.

"We have a lot of young men who are completely disengaged from our society because quite frankly they don’t feel they’re being valued as men. So they think, why even try when everybody sees me as a thug, as a delinquent, when everyone assumes the worst of me instead of assuming the best of me?”

Pedro Hidalgo, another senior at University Park, said he “never had that belief within myself” that he could go to college. Then “teachers in middle school actually helped me realize that I’m more than what I seem to think that I am at times. They just helped me progressively become more confident with my abilities, not even as just a student, but as a person.”

With the extreme demands put on teachers (administrative and otherwise), it is more difficult than ever for them to have the time to connect with those borderline/fringe students to help them become more confident. Instead, they are continuously told from a young age that they are bad, stupid, and hopeless, and that message is internalized.

That's very whiney and non-man like.

Maybe they don't treat you like a man because you don't behave like one?

If it's just one guy, your criticism is founded. If it's the entire generation (60% of college undergrads are female), then it's systemic.

A 10% imbalance is "the entire generation"?

You guys do this every time, like clockwork. Take a documented problem faced by black and brown boys, generalize it to white boys based on nothing, then claim it's oppression against white boys.

Agree. Fewer teen boys meet the requirements for college acceptance than in years past. That’s on the parents. Boys are held to the same academic standard for admission as girls. That was not always the case. Instead of whining and cheating, maybe teach your son respect for others, give him a work ethic, and check the requirements before they begin high school so you can assure they will qualify.

Anonymous wrote:The experiences outlined in the article aren't limited to young men of color, though their disconnection from school may be the most dramatic and visible failure of our education system. My DD was also told by teachers and admin repeatedly that she would never go to college, most likely never finish high school. And guess what? She heard and believed. She won't go to college, either.

Public education has a lot to answer for.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This quotation resonated with me based on my experience with my boys, who are not POC. It is ever worse for boys of color.

"We have a lot of young men who are completely disengaged from our society because quite frankly they don’t feel they’re being valued as men. So they think, why even try when everybody sees me as a thug, as a delinquent, when everyone assumes the worst of me instead of assuming the best of me?”

Pedro Hidalgo, another senior at University Park, said he “never had that belief within myself” that he could go to college. Then “teachers in middle school actually helped me realize that I’m more than what I seem to think that I am at times. They just helped me progressively become more confident with my abilities, not even as just a student, but as a person.”

With the extreme demands put on teachers (administrative and otherwise), it is more difficult than ever for them to have the time to connect with those borderline/fringe students to help them become more confident. Instead, they are continuously told from a young age that they are bad, stupid, and hopeless, and that message is internalized.

That's very whiney and non-man like.

Maybe they don't treat you like a man because you don't behave like one?

If it's just one guy, your criticism is founded. If it's the entire generation (60% of college undergrads are female), then it's systemic.

A 10% imbalance is "the entire generation"?

You guys do this every time, like clockwork. Take a documented problem faced by black and brown boys, generalize it to white boys based on nothing, then claim it's oppression against white boys.

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Anonymous wrote:We are Asian and I have a son with ADHD and a daughter without. I completely reject any notion that boys have it harder overall in their lives. Yes, my son has it terribly hard at school, and yes, it's harder for him to apply to college, because of his race and because of his grades impacted by his ADHD. But male privilege is such that he will be "saved" in his career by being male and given the benefit of the doubt, whereas my daughter, despite great intelligence and functional skills, will always need to prove herself at every rung of the ladder.

So take this recent data in perspective.

It isn’t harder because he is Asian. Give me a freaking break.

data says otherwise.

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Anonymous wrote:We are Asian and I have a son with ADHD and a daughter without. I completely reject any notion that boys have it harder overall in their lives. Yes, my son has it terribly hard at school, and yes, it's harder for him to apply to college, because of his race and because of his grades impacted by his ADHD. But male privilege is such that he will be "saved" in his career by being male and given the benefit of the doubt, whereas my daughter, despite great intelligence and functional skills, will always need to prove herself at every rung of the ladder.

So take this recent data in perspective.

It isn’t harder because he is Asian. Give me a freaking break.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are Asian and I have a son with ADHD and a daughter without. I completely reject any notion that boys have it harder overall in their lives. Yes, my son has it terribly hard at school, and yes, it's harder for him to apply to college, because of his race and because of his grades impacted by his ADHD. But male privilege is such that he will be "saved" in his career by being male and given the benefit of the doubt, whereas my daughter, despite great intelligence and functional skills, will always need to prove herself at every rung of the ladder.

So take this recent data in perspective.

It isn’t harder because he is Asian. Give me a freaking break.

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Anonymous wrote:When I went to college for engineering 20 years ago, only 10% of students were female. I viisted last year and it's about 50-50 now. The efforts to get girls to study STEM are really paying off.

But.. there are no efforts to get boys to study anything. It's like all the resources were directed to girls, and boys got nothing. It's sad.

Because men studying and getting everything already was/is the DEFAULT! This line of thinking is so asinine. Duh!

Anonymous wrote:We are Asian and I have a son with ADHD and a daughter without. I completely reject any notion that boys have it harder overall in their lives. Yes, my son has it terribly hard at school, and yes, it's harder for him to apply to college, because of his race and because of his grades impacted by his ADHD. But male privilege is such that he will be "saved" in his career by being male and given the benefit of the doubt, whereas my daughter, despite great intelligence and functional skills, will always need to prove herself at every rung of the ladder.

So take this recent data in perspective.

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Anonymous wrote:Agree that girls can have ADHD too - but I do think that the numbers of medicated boys these days is staggering and really sad.

Such bs.

Why? I believe this is true, and even as a feminist I think it's awful that an entire generation of little kids (boys) are drugged up in order to do school successfully.