Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our teen son claims every one of his friends is getting one. Are we the only parents who don't allow these addiction machines in our house? I don't understand how parents not only welcome this addiction into their homes, they pay $500+ for the privilege – it's a freaking drug. Boys are far more likely to drop out of college and twice as likely to live at home as adults. These video games are sapping their ambition and attention span, and often end up controling their life.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-creativity-cure/201603/the-silent-epidemic-young-men-dropping-out-college

Psychology Today sucks.

The article is over 4 years old and research is stale.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can play games with a group of friends online. Boys no longer call each other to talk. They talk while playing games using Xbox or PlayStation. If you have no gaming system it can be hard to be social.

My son started a new school for 5th grade. He now plays with 3 other kids from his school for 30 minutes to an hour in the evening. He would feel really isolated without that connection.

That’s exactly right. Instead they spew misogynistic and racist garbage through their video games because nobody is watching. Your kids are exposed to all kinds of things you don’t know about on there.

They do this in the gym, on the playing field and everywhere else.

I’ve never heard my son say anything inappropriate on Xbox live or on the playing field. Sorry your son was so poorly raised though.

My kids are 6 and 8. We don’t have one. That was a ridiculous comment.

My knowledge is based on half a dozen male friends who tell me what goes on in the chats. My black friend plays and nobody knows he’s black and he says you should hear the racist crap people say and all kinds of hateful things about women. It doesn’t surprise me. Anonymity of being online makes things worse. That’s different than being in person in an all-male macho environment.

My black son plays and his friend group is very anti-racist, anyone who spews that kind of hate gets put in their place immediately.

And have you monitored how they talk about girls when he doesn't know you're listening?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can play games with a group of friends online. Boys no longer call each other to talk. They talk while playing games using Xbox or PlayStation. If you have no gaming system it can be hard to be social.

My son started a new school for 5th grade. He now plays with 3 other kids from his school for 30 minutes to an hour in the evening. He would feel really isolated without that connection.

That’s exactly right. Instead they spew misogynistic and racist garbage through their video games because nobody is watching. Your kids are exposed to all kinds of things you don’t know about on there.

They do this in the gym, on the playing field and everywhere else.

I’ve never heard my son say anything inappropriate on Xbox live or on the playing field. Sorry your son was so poorly raised though.

My kids are 6 and 8. We don’t have one. That was a ridiculous comment.

My knowledge is based on half a dozen male friends who tell me what goes on in the chats. My black friend plays and nobody knows he’s black and he says you should hear the racist crap people say and all kinds of hateful things about women. It doesn’t surprise me. Anonymity of being online makes things worse. That’s different than being in person in an all-male macho environment.

My black son plays and his friend group is very anti-racist, anyone who spews that kind of hate gets put in their place immediately.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No you are not the only parents who make your kids' life miserable. Signed, someone who grew up in a no screens household, and whose brother nearly dropped out of college because of videogame addiction

So your brother couldn't play video games at home so once he went to college he went crazy playing. Maybe if he learned to play in moderation at home it wouldn't have been a problem.

This was exactly my point!

Your anecdote was obviously fabricated to rationalize why your kids have a system. How do I know? You are on a parent forum, so you're at least 30 years old, likely at least 40. So your family was "no screens" in the 90s, when cell phones didn't exist? Did the term "no screens" even exist in our lexicon prior to 2010 or so? And your brother went from zero video games age 0 to 18 to getting to college, immediately going to Best Buy to buy a Nintendo and or gaming computer and became addicted in his dorm? Sure.

I am not sure I follow?
We had no TV, then when we got a TV set we watched it maybe once a month. When he went to college he got himself his first PC and that’s how it started.
My point is that even kids who grow up without videogames like my brother did can get addicted.
I am not sure what your point is?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our teen son claims every one of his friends is getting one. Are we the only parents who don't allow these addiction machines in our house? I don't understand how parents not only welcome this addiction into their homes, they pay $500+ for the privilege – it's a freaking drug. Boys are far more likely to drop out of college and twice as likely to live at home as adults. These video games are sapping their ambition and attention span, and often end up controling their life.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-creativity-cure/201603/the-silent-epidemic-young-men-dropping-out-college

Psychology Today sucks.

Anonymous wrote:Our teen son claims every one of his friends is getting one. Are we the only parents who don't allow these addiction machines in our house? I don't understand how parents not only welcome this addiction into their homes, they pay $500+ for the privilege – it's a freaking drug. Boys are far more likely to drop out of college and twice as likely to live at home as adults. These video games are sapping their ambition and attention span, and often end up controling their life.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-creativity-cure/201603/the-silent-epidemic-young-men-dropping-out-college

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your child is going to have issues with addictive behavior, delaying their access to video games isn’t going to help. If anything, it means that they will first get meaningful access at a time when you can’t provide as much guidance and oversight (eg, college), and they are therefore more likely to get into trouble with it. By allowing kids to have video games while they are still living under our roof, we have the ability to set rules in a way that teaches them healthy ways to manage screen use.

Do you have evidence to support this view? All the research I've seen on addictive behavior suggests the opposite-- that the longer first use is delayed, the less likely addiction is. The research on alcoholism, too take one type of addiction, is unequivocal. Research has found that people whose first exposure to alcohol is at age 13 and 14 are 9 times more likely to develop alcoholism than people whose first exposure is at age 19 or older. Given what we know about the brain chemistry of addiction, there's no reason to think a similar pattern isn't evident with other addictive "substances."

Your opinion about addictive behavior is a common one among American parents. But the reality is that kids who delay drinking e.g. until college are statistically much less likely to get into trouble with it than kids who start drinking in high school (especially early high school).

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/10784467/

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No you are not the only parents who make your kids' life miserable. Signed, someone who grew up in a no screens household, and whose brother nearly dropped out of college because of videogame addiction

So your brother couldn't play video games at home so once he went to college he went crazy playing. Maybe if he learned to play in moderation at home it wouldn't have been a problem.

This was exactly my point!

Your anecdote was obviously fabricated to rationalize why your kids have a system. How do I know? You are on a parent forum, so you're at least 30 years old, likely at least 40. So your family was "no screens" in the 90s, when cell phones didn't exist? Did the term "no screens" even exist in our lexicon prior to 2010 or so? And your brother went from zero video games age 0 to 18 to getting to college, immediately going to Best Buy to buy a Nintendo and or gaming computer and became addicted in his dorm? Sure.

I am not sure I follow?
We had no TV, then when we got a TV set we watched it maybe once a month. When he went to college he got himself his first PC and that’s how it started.
My point is that even kids who grow up without videogames like my brother did can get addicted.
I am not sure what your point is?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I suppose it’s a problem if your child has an addictive personality and no other social or physical interests, but that’s not the case for many kids. DS has one and hardly ever plays with it. He’s outside hanging out with other kids right now (within our pod).

My son's hockey team is full of amazing, competitive athletes ... and nearly all of them are addicted to video games when they're not on the ice. Talking with other parents about classes they're in and test scores ... they're basically all dull, which is of course predictable.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No you are not the only parents who make your kids' life miserable. Signed, someone who grew up in a no screens household, and whose brother nearly dropped out of college because of videogame addiction

So your brother couldn't play video games at home so once he went to college he went crazy playing. Maybe if he learned to play in moderation at home it wouldn't have been a problem.

This was exactly my point!

Your anecdote was obviously fabricated to rationalize why your kids have a system. How do I know? You are on a parent forum, so you're at least 30 years old, likely at least 40. So your family was "no screens" in the 90s, when cell phones didn't exist? Did the term "no screens" even exist in our lexicon prior to 2010 or so? And your brother went from zero video games age 0 to 18 to getting to college, immediately going to Best Buy to buy a Nintendo and or gaming computer and became addicted in his dorm? Sure.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No you are not the only parents who make your kids' life miserable. Signed, someone who grew up in a no screens household, and whose brother nearly dropped out of college because of videogame addiction

So your brother couldn't play video games at home so once he went to college he went crazy playing. Maybe if he learned to play in moderation at home it wouldn't have been a problem.

This was exactly my point!