I was a girl scout leader in the DMV area for many years, as was my mother when I was young. I don't think drinking on an overnight trip by chaperones is okay at all! It's not safe for the girls, should there be a fire, or a medical emergency (allergy issue, injury, need for medication, etc.). That's extremely irresponsible behavior, and, as the mother of a child with a chronic illness myself, I would have been really upset by this.

Anonymous wrote:I think you have been more than generous. Since no one has responded, I would already assume Suzie is a no go, and move on without her.

Same. At the very most I’d send one final email saying if we do not hear from you by 5pm today she cannot attend. I’d also say she cannot attend without her mother and that the mother is expected to remain sober on the trip. They’ll probably quit on their own after that email.

P.S. If you feel like she is being emotionally abused, call the school counselor and let them know and they can take it from there.

If my girl was in a troop with this girl/mom, I would have a major problem with you continuing to include them in travel trips with her stealing and behavioral issues and not participating in anything else but the trips. Her behavior and her mom's is a safety liability for everyone else involved. Don't extend the deadline for response. What if she does respond, then now you have to figure out how to deal with both of them and the high possibility of ruining the trip the the rest of the troop. You dont need to pretend to be nice or feel guilty for saying enough is enough.

I say book the trip now and if the other family gets back to you after that, tell them "sorry you missed the deadline". Is she even a registered member of your troop to even be included on the trip? If she hasn't done the cookie sales to raise money for the troop outing, I don't see how she could be included to spend the other girls money on the trip.

Troop leader here who is currently working with my service unit for help in dealing with a difficult parent. What I know is that you can't single out this girl, but if you have emailed the whole troop with a deadline and clear instructions and she didn't respond, you are fine in saying that she can't attend. You can also send all girls/chaperones a behavior contract that they must sign and agree to, which includes the consequences for violation (e.g., having to leave the trip). You want a clear paper trail showing that everybody was given the same information and instructions. Removing a girl from the troop (if you wanted to move in that direction) is a different matter and would need mediation and an investigation with SU and council.

I think I may be echoing what others have already said, but it is fresh on my mind so I thought I would share.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I want to hear the dog-sneaking story. Did she bring the dog on the trip, hide it in the car during check-in and then sneak the dog in a backpack past receptionists, or something?

The dog is a beagle and she had it in the car the whole time until she got drunk and decided it needed to be in the hotel. I wasn’t there so I don’t know how they snuck it in but it was in their room in the morning and she was slightly sheepish about it. I did tell her that if we were charged for it that she was responsible and she just rolled her eyes at me.

NP here. That's awful for any dog, but especially for a beagle, who will howl and bay and bark a lot.

Beagle owner here.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I want to hear the dog-sneaking story. Did she bring the dog on the trip, hide it in the car during check-in and then sneak the dog in a backpack past receptionists, or something?

The dog is a beagle and she had it in the car the whole time until she got drunk and decided it needed to be in the hotel. I wasn’t there so I don’t know how they snuck it in but it was in their room in the morning and she was slightly sheepish about it. I did tell her that if we were charged for it that she was responsible and she just rolled her eyes at me.

By “their” room does that mean drunk Susie’s mom was sharing a room with Susie? Or with the other parents who had gone drinking? The latter is more forgivable than the former I think.

She was in a room with Suzie and another hot mess mom who was only in the troop a year and the 2 girls (and the dog). Other hot mess mom was crazy but she apparently didn’t drink much.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man, if ever a situation warranted drinking, it’s chaperoning a bunch of Girl Scouts. But I can’t imagine actually doing it. I’ve been a troop leader for 10 years and most of the parents are my good friends and we go out and drink socially, but NO WAY during a scout function. We suck it up and deal.

As a parent I would be livid if I found out the adult chaperones were drinking. I would not be quiet about it.

Every single mom knew about trip 1 and didn’t care and all but me and one other knew about the second time and didn’t care

Anonymous wrote:Is Susie’s mom the only one who hadn’t given you a go/no go for the trip?

Yes

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I want to hear the dog-sneaking story. Did she bring the dog on the trip, hide it in the car during check-in and then sneak the dog in a backpack past receptionists, or something?

The dog is a beagle and she had it in the car the whole time until she got drunk and decided it needed to be in the hotel. I wasn’t there so I don’t know how they snuck it in but it was in their room in the morning and she was slightly sheepish about it. I did tell her that if we were charged for it that she was responsible and she just rolled her eyes at me.

By “their” room does that mean drunk Susie’s mom was sharing a room with Susie? Or with the other parents who had gone drinking? The latter is more forgivable than the former I think.

Is Susie’s mom the only one who hadn’t given you a go/no go for the trip?

Anonymous wrote:Man, if ever a situation warranted drinking, it’s chaperoning a bunch of Girl Scouts. But I can’t imagine actually doing it. I’ve been a troop leader for 10 years and most of the parents are my good friends and we go out and drink socially, but NO WAY during a scout function. We suck it up and deal.

As a parent I would be livid if I found out the adult chaperones were drinking. I would not be quiet about it.

Anonymous wrote:I'm the OP and I wasn't the person who asked the question about who would pay for it. I think whether we could afford this depends on how much it would cost (I really have no idea). maybe council would have some recommendations about a support person I could have come along (but again, I have no idea if she is even available to do the trip...)

DP. Please just stop entertaining any idea of hacks to make this work for Suzie. It's far too late to ask the SU or Council for help finding a support person who likely doesn't exist in this case. Its going too far to offer yet another "final" chance for mom to say yes, Susie's coming.

Let it go.

It's time to book the activities; Suzie is not taking part because mom did not respond to the same repeated emails you sent EVERYONE. I'm a leader and had a girl with serious mental health issues in my troop for years and her parents were able to deal with basic communications through all the girl's very difficult issues. The fact that Suzie's mom can't do the same and just maintain the most basic contact is really sad, and it's Suzie who loses out, but frankly it's time to be done.

Anonymous wrote:OP, I want to hear the dog-sneaking story. Did she bring the dog on the trip, hide it in the car during check-in and then sneak the dog in a backpack past receptionists, or something?

The dog is a beagle and she had it in the car the whole time until she got drunk and decided it needed to be in the hotel. I wasn’t there so I don’t know how they snuck it in but it was in their room in the morning and she was slightly sheepish about it. I did tell her that if we were charged for it that she was responsible and she just rolled her eyes at me.