Anonymous wrote:Have the party. Order some books for favors, pizza and juice and cupcakes for food. Have it at the same gym. I had a horrible recoverubwith my first, but was back to normal with my second by 2 weeks. It’s so much different the second time.

So we did books as favors last year I got a bunch of cheap books and put them in a basket with a sign saying they could each take one.

I had multiple parents thank me for not introducing more plastic crap into their house

My kids have had birthday parties most years, but not every single year. If you can provide her with a plausible non-baby explanation, I would skip it this year.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have to have a party. You don't want your older kid to feel resentment toward the baby.

OP here. I thought about this, too. If we didn't have a party, I would not say it's because of the baby, I would give her some other believable reason. She's young enough that she very well might not put 1 and 1 together. I would also plan some other activity, such as family outing to Disney on Ice (or whatever is going on then that she would want to go to) for her birthday so we would still celebrate it.

Stop kidding yourself. She is five and she can figure it out for herself. You don't have to have a huge party but you do have to do something beyond a cake! It isn't her fault that you are pregnant! Why should she suffer? Also, why can't your DH host a party for her? Stop assuming that your child is stupid!

Life is going to be really hard for OP with two if she’s this overwhelmed by this task. One of the kids in my DD’s class is now one of 4 and he and his sibs’ joint birthday party (all boys born 2 years apart in the same month) was a week or two ago. Mom and dad both work full time and they pulled off an awesome party in a local rec center (so they did most of the work) and attended with their 2 week old in tow. Grandparents took care of the baby at the party. Seriously impressive.

I love these rare consensus "OP you're wrong" posts!

We had my daughter's third birthday party at Little Gym when my younger daughter was 4 weeks old. You will be fine. It is doable.

Have the party. Front load the work as much as possible (ordering cake, getting guest list together and evite drafted and ready to send, set up a calendar reminder to actually send the evite, getting goody bags done, whatever). If you have a nanny who can lend a hand with the baby at the party, you’re fine. You can do this!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I did this. I didn't want my daughter to feel displaced by the new baby. I did as much planning as I could in advance. Grandma watched the baby so DH and I could attend the party (didn't want to expose baby to bounce house germs).

Sigh... I guess I can do this.... not looking forward to it, but it's doable. No grandparents in the area, but I know her nanny would be okay with watching the baby during the party.

What exactly is the problem? You have your husband and a nanny. The venue does all the work. Stop being selfish and lazy

THIS. I had a party for my DD when the baby was 6 weeks old - we did it at a jumpy place and went ahead and ordered the full package (rent the whole place, the venue provides a party room, decorations, plates, napkins, pizza, juice box, veggie tray, cupcakes, even the candle). I literally didn't have to do anything. We had our trusted in home provider come watch the baby at our house.

I have 3 kids and work full time and have planned about 25 parties at this point, ranging from very little work to a lot of work. I really don’t see this taking more than 30 minute, all of which you can do from the couch while baby is nursing.
1. Book party online — 5 minutes.
2 order grocery store cake online - 5 minutes.
3. Create and send evite — 10 minutes
3. Respond to call from party place week before party to confirm numbers — 5 minutes
What else is there to do? Don’t do gift bags but if you feel like you’ll be socially shunned, order a box set of something like magic tree house books and give one to each kid.
Honestly, I think it will be a nice opportunity to see other adult human beings, as lots of adults stay for 5 year old parties. In which case I might order a cheese/fruit platter and a box of coffee or something too, so adults can snack while the kids play. But that’s optional.

We threw a graduation party in our home for my BIL when our third was 6 weeks. 40 guests. Invitations, decor, catering all ordered before baby came. Cleaners came the day before. A couple family members helped set up. It was totally fine.

We then had a 4th birthday party at a venue when baby was 10 weeks. Ordered decor and favors from Amazon. Got a cake and venue did everything else. I wore the baby, nursed when I needed to. No big deal.

Sure, do it at a venue, book the party and send invites via evite, and then have DH go and you can stay home and nap. The laser tag party I did for my son was the easiest to plan, and honestly it didn’t take much planning.

Have the party. Order some books for favors, pizza and juice and cupcakes for food. Have it at the same gym. I had a horrible recoverubwith my first, but was back to normal with my second by 2 weeks. It’s so much different the second time.

We had a birthday party for my eldest when our twins were about eight weeks old. Of course you have the party. We had it at a bowling place that took care of everything including pizza, drinks, balloons, and cake. For favors we ordered beanie boos from Amazon, plus the venue provided arcade cards and prizes for each child. My mother in law and sister in law came down to visit and helped with the babies for the duration of the hour and a half party. It was probably the easiest party we’ve ever done.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had to check the dates on this post: Your baby is due in 4 months, and you’re here wringing your hands over a party that is in 6 months? And you have a nanny and spouse that can help with all of this. Really???

When you finish this, can you address my holiday cards and reorganize my closet with all this free time you seem to have?

This is what happens when grown adults outsource too much of their life. She’s a SAHM with a nanny and a husband but she can’t even handle literally scheduling a bounce house party that’s 6 months away and has to spend November concocting a pretend struggle about it to feel like she’s doing something.

You don’t even have to call. You can do it online.

And she’s the “designated party planner” according to her own comments. But still. Too hard.

I'm in the same situation, baby is due in late May and my older daughter will celebrate in late June.

My plan is to do it at a bouncy house place and preplan as much as humanly possible.