?

Oh, having sex in your room at age 18–no risk associated with that??!!

Not the PP, but my freshman DS also has a girlfriend already and I'm not really expecting him to be celibate. Secular family, no reason for this particular 18 year old to save himself for his wedding night. He's had girlfriends before and I assume this would not be new territory.

Still, he would definitely be risky for him to have sex in his room because his bed is lofted really high and seems kind of rickety.

Oh, having sex in your room at age 18–no risk associated with that??!!

Oh, having sex in your room at age 18–no risk associated with that??!!

DS already has an exclusive girlfriend. I kinda wish he'd date around a bit, but I think pizza dates and Netflix and chill is cutting down on partying....so there's that.

How Much is Your College Freshman Partying?

Why would you know?
You shouldn't know. There's something really wrong with you if you think you know.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well my niece is having a great freshman year at UVA. How do I know? Instagram! The party pictures are there...

How dumb can she be? My friend's daughter was kicked out for underage drinking. Both found on IG. First one was a write up thru the RA. The second was the school dean and a panel. She was stripped of her merit scholarship.

Not sure that happens anymore. My dd attends a northern SLAC. Everyone is drinking and everyone is posting about it.

Is that impacted by private vs public? I went to college in the 70s, many states had 18-yo drinking ages for awhile there, I went from a state with 18 to a state with 21 but it was a private college and absolutely no enforcement of drinking age, plus I'm pretty sure at the time you could legally give your kid (or your underage bride) alcohol (can't in my state now, I know, not even wine with dinner at home, I think they allow communion wine but that's all). Alcohol was built in to official celebrations (idk who paid for it though). Police could NOT come on campus without a warrant, although we were careful not to allow town kids to participate (small enough where we all knew each other). My impression is that the rules have definitely tightened up in the years since, to what extent affected by any changes in state laws I have no idea.

Not long after that my brother, who was 21 and in a state college, was caught with beer in the dorm with his roommate, just the two of them, got expelled.

Personally, it comes down to money for me.

My parents didn't give me a dime after I left home at 18, and I paid my way through 8 postsecondary years of school via scholarships, loans, and working. Accordingly, they had no visibility nor should they have had insight into my spending, social life, grades, etc. I was responsible for myself.

By comparison, if I'm paying for my child's education (or if they did) it is an investment like any other. There is a lot better ways to spend thousands of dollars than having a kid get in academic trouble because they can't keep their house in order due to partying. I'd want visibility to make sure my money isn't going to waste. I'm pretty confident I am an outlier on that, but it's not about helicopter parenting. To me it is money management.

I just now got a call from my freshman in a top 20 who is carrying 19 credits. I know he has been to a couple of parties but frankly, he has not had time for a lot of socializing due to his courseload and particularly one course he took which is requiring 14 plus hours of honework each week. He just called me to tell me he wants to drop it, which is 100% fine with me. I trust his judgment and it’s not going to effect his graduation date because he has AP credits for this requirement. This was an honors level math which was very difficult and apparently the class typically shrinks by half every semester because of kids not being able to keep up. I am proud that he tried it and also proud he is making the decision that makes the most sense for his physical and mental health. TBH I don’t want him spending all his time in the library or study rooms. The school he is attending is a lot of fun on game days and there is tons going on otherwise, and I want him to have a balanced college life...and that might include some parties. I do know he is not A huge drinker, but he will have a beer or two for the social aspect, but not to get trashed. Glad I had the phone by my bedside tonight. It is totally out of character for him to call me, so he clearly wanted to bounce it off me and I am sure he has been feeling anxious about it.

Anonymous wrote:What school?

Clemson