Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While they were very rude to proceed with booking a weekend you said was bad--inexcusably so--OP was rude for not getting back to them within 24-48 hours.

It takes no longer than 48 hours, TOPS, to look at your calendar (which should be up to date; hello, it's the digital age), and propose a few sets of dates for your spouse to confirm. This can all happen within a few hours, and there's really no excuse why you can't get it done in a timely manner.

I bet if your boss asked you about dates, you'd have an answer faster. If you CAN get it done for your boss, you CAN get it done for your family; who should be more important to you than your boss.

You have no idea why it took her so long maybe they were work plans plans , plans with other people, things that were still up in the air, there are lots of reasons why you do not get back to somebody within 24 to 48 hours and I know good and well that my mother nor my mother-in-law would make plans in that way if I had not gotten back to them in two days they may react reach out again and say do you have a date or not but they wouldn’t do that and your bullshit about how your family is more important then your boss, go sit somewhere, just go in a corner and hide.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While they were very rude to proceed with booking a weekend you said was bad--inexcusably so--OP was rude for not getting back to them within 24-48 hours.

It takes no longer than 48 hours, TOPS, to look at your calendar (which should be up to date; hello, it's the digital age), and propose a few sets of dates for your spouse to confirm. This can all happen within a few hours, and there's really no excuse why you can't get it done in a timely manner.

I bet if your boss asked you about dates, you'd have an answer faster. If you CAN get it done for your boss, you CAN get it done for your family; who should be more important to you than your boss.

Exactly! Why so slow OP? Did you just not want them to visit at all and they called your bluff?

Doesn’t explain why they picked that eeekend, though.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow - everyone answering must have very young families to stress over such little matters. My son is 8, my father is dying. I'd cancel pretty much anything to have him visit. I know your parents aren't dying so I hate to be so dramatic, but there has to be some understanding.

This is such horseshit. While I'm sorry for your situation, it's got nothing to do with this, and using guilt to get your way is the classic example of the boundary challenged. You need some self-reflection.

You are very weird. I'm not using guilt. I'm saying I have priorities in check because of my immediate situation. Relax.

Speak for yourself then. How does your father dying have anything to do with OP? Don't project.

OP's post and specific question was: How would you handle?

That's how I'd handle, and why. But further, when you are able to look at the bigger picture, you place more importance on family than other crap. And finally, for the record, I never said the kids should miss anything. If it were me,
I'd make Friday night a great evening,
I'd share a big family breakfast Saturday morning,
I'd take both kids to their parties Saturday, and fit some visiting and fun in between,
I'd tell Mom and Dad to check into a nice hotel Sunday afternoon and plan a fun evening on their own
I'd tell them I cannot take them to the airport Monday because it's a religious holiday that I'll be spending with my family and inlaws.

Remove the sticks from your butts and be a little flexible. Life is too short to stress over one weekend.

That's how I'D handle!

That sounds absolutely exhausting. And they had plenty of “family” time planned already.

No dying parent in the picture, no reason why they couldn’t come another weekend.

Anonymous wrote:While they were very rude to proceed with booking a weekend you said was bad--inexcusably so--OP was rude for not getting back to them within 24-48 hours.

It takes no longer than 48 hours, TOPS, to look at your calendar (which should be up to date; hello, it's the digital age), and propose a few sets of dates for your spouse to confirm. This can all happen within a few hours, and there's really no excuse why you can't get it done in a timely manner.

I bet if your boss asked you about dates, you'd have an answer faster. If you CAN get it done for your boss, you CAN get it done for your family; who should be more important to you than your boss.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While they were very rude to proceed with booking a weekend you said was bad--inexcusably so--OP was rude for not getting back to them within 24-48 hours.

It takes no longer than 48 hours, TOPS, to look at your calendar (which should be up to date; hello, it's the digital age), and propose a few sets of dates for your spouse to confirm. This can all happen within a few hours, and there's really no excuse why you can't get it done in a timely manner.

I bet if your boss asked you about dates, you'd have an answer faster. If you CAN get it done for your boss, you CAN get it done for your family; who should be more important to you than your boss.

Exactly! Why so slow OP? Did you just not want them to visit at all and they called your bluff?

Anonymous wrote:Similar issue with MIL. She asked to come that weekend. We are all Jewish. DS has a birthday party on Saturday and he's going. We also have plans to go to synagogue on Monday morning and MIL isn't observant and doesn't want to go. DS started Hebrew school last year and we're trying to get him more involved in holidays and traditions. MIL will say things to DS like "Ohh, you don't want to go to services! That's boring! Stay here and play with Grandma instead!". Then we'll have to convince DS that he's going, when he was previously excited about going before MIL tried to convince him otherwise. It's also DS's own birthday weekend and he had made plans to celebrate with some friends, but MIL doesn't understand why he's not content with just celebrating with her. Basically she's not happy unless we cancel all plans just to sit around and stare at each other.

We told her we already have set plans for that weekend and that we're not changing them. She said OK just to get us to allow her to come, but once she's here she'll start whining about how DS isn't around every second to spend time with her. When this happens DH is on board with me at the time, but then months pass by and she manages to guilt trip DH into having her come here again just to pull the same stunts.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While they were very rude to proceed with booking a weekend you said was bad--inexcusably so--OP was rude for not getting back to them within 24-48 hours.

It takes no longer than 48 hours, TOPS, to look at your calendar (which should be up to date; hello, it's the digital age), and propose a few sets of dates for your spouse to confirm. This can all happen within a few hours, and there's really no excuse why you can't get it done in a timely manner.

I bet if your boss asked you about dates, you'd have an answer faster. If you CAN get it done for your boss, you CAN get it done for your family; who should be more important to you than your boss.

Exactly! Why so slow OP? Did you just not want them to visit at all and they called your bluff?

Anonymous wrote:While they were very rude to proceed with booking a weekend you said was bad--inexcusably so--OP was rude for not getting back to them within 24-48 hours.

It takes no longer than 48 hours, TOPS, to look at your calendar (which should be up to date; hello, it's the digital age), and propose a few sets of dates for your spouse to confirm. This can all happen within a few hours, and there's really no excuse why you can't get it done in a timely manner.

I bet if your boss asked you about dates, you'd have an answer faster. If you CAN get it done for your boss, you CAN get it done for your family; who should be more important to you than your boss.

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, I told you that weekend doesn't work for us. I wish you'd listened when I told you I'd get back to you with an alternate date. You're welcome to come I guess, but we're going to be running around a lot.

And then don't cancel anything.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow - everyone answering must have very young families to stress over such little matters. My son is 8, my father is dying. I'd cancel pretty much anything to have him visit. I know your parents aren't dying so I hate to be so dramatic, but there has to be some understanding.

This is such horseshit. While I'm sorry for your situation, it's got nothing to do with this, and using guilt to get your way is the classic example of the boundary challenged. You need some self-reflection.

You are very weird. I'm not using guilt. I'm saying I have priorities in check because of my immediate situation. Relax.

Speak for yourself then. How does your father dying have anything to do with OP? Don't project.

OP's post and specific question was: How would you handle?

That's how I'd handle, and why. But further, when you are able to look at the bigger picture, you place more importance on family than other crap. And finally, for the record, I never said the kids should miss anything. If it were me,
I'd make Friday night a great evening,
I'd share a big family breakfast Saturday morning,
I'd take both kids to their parties Saturday, and fit some visiting and fun in between,
I'd tell Mom and Dad to check into a nice hotel Sunday afternoon and plan a fun evening on their own
I'd tell them I cannot take them to the airport Monday because it's a religious holiday that I'll be spending with my family and inlaws.

Remove the sticks from your butts and be a little flexible. Life is too short to stress over one weekend.

That's how I'D handle!